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When is sex allowed or safe?

gar0262ggar0262 Posts: 164
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:24 AM in Back Surgery and Neck Surgery
I know that this is a tough question, but I must admit, my dr did not specifically say when it was okay to have sex after surgery. All I've got to go by is the post op instructions, and all it says is when incision is healed. I had a laminectomy with plif and hardware on sept 15, with the typical restrictions of 10lbs weight limit and no blt. I feel it is too soon, but my hubby seems to think I'm healed cuz he's already hinting at it. @) I know that all doctors have differnet opinions and that we all heal at different rates but I need help here. :S


  • Hiya Gloria, :?
    This is a subject we all think about, but some how we avoid to apraoch it 8} . I personally think its down to how you feel in yourself. :)

    Angie :H x

  • to my dr and he said its dependent on when YOU feel comfortable with it, He said dont start with nothing wild and crazy but when you feel comfortable enough it should be fine! good luck..lol
  • I read somewhere that it was up to how you feel, and then you should be the partner on the bottom. Good-luck, Sue
  • He said if you can do it without breaking your restrictions and without increased discomfort to go for it.

    On the other hand there was a post a few weeks ago about this topic. There are many ways to be intimate and intercourse doesnt need to be the focus. Its worth looking up and reading.

    Take care,
  • I had sex for the first time but its like everyone is stating. It's when YOURE ready and think you can handle it. The position I found to be good was with the woman on her back and the man on his left side with the womans right leg though his and her left leg over his torso around his waist. Kind of a scissor position. I also wore my brace to make sure I restricted movement. :))(
    Hope this helps.

    Take Care,
    Christina :)
  • christina that was interesting at the least =)) =)) =)) =))

    glor yes it all comes down to you being comfy. i think i waited last yr till 6 wks. cause even at that point after we were done UGGHHHHHH i was sore no doubt and the next day.
    but a good sore if that makes sence :/ :D O:)

    i kept a ice pack on my incision. stayed on my back.
    im not telling anything else =))
  • lol... :))(
    Yep I was sore the next day too :P

    Christina >:D<
  • Then tell the hubby you love him, but back off!! =;

    Don't do anything until you feel completely comfortable with it.

    One Love,

  • I think I waited like 2 weeks, or a week and a half. I am hurting today but not from anything like that. I fell asleep last night at 9pm, and woke up at 8am and forgot to take my percocet and valium, and I woke up with every muscle in my body KILLING. It's amazing what the Valium does. I have that pain in my knee and behind my knee they call "growing pains". Sucks. I just bought a second heating pad so I could use one for my back and one for my leg. Blahhhh! Lol.
  • Forgot to add... I was told "as tolerated by pain"
  • I think it depends on your surgery but like all activities, you'll soon know if you over did it! :))(

    You'll soon know when you ready, physically and emotionally.

    If hubby is too keen, remind him how major it all is! =))
  • When I find a partner???? lmao

    :))( :))( :))( :))(
  • From the caution in the sound of your post, it sounds to me like you aren't ready yet. You said you think it's too soon, so that should be the deciding factor.

    You also said he thinks you are healed? Even if you decide you are ready for sex, he needs to be fully aware of your concerns and the fact you are not ready for crazy-monkey sex. He needs to keep the training wheels on so to speak. If he can't proceed at a slow, careful pace, then don't do it. Is he hinting that you are normal now and can do other things too, like bend and pick up stuff? I just want to make sure there's not a deeper concern here, like maybe he's not being sensitve to your restrictions?

    Keep us updated on how things go! ;)

  • I never imagined the amount of responses I would get to this question but I am so thankful to all of you for your responses. >:D< Some of them were quite interesting :))( I am so glad to have found this site, as it has been a life saver. O:)
  • I hurt all the time. I've hurt since my laminotomy surgery in December of 2011. Is it possible to hurt the rest of your life from a degerative disc, or do they eventually stop hurting? Obviously the surgery did not turn out the way I expected it would. Doctor says my disc probably needs to come out. Another doctor said fusion only works 50% of the time. He wants to do a bone scan on me. I feel like I've been disabled since my 2011 surgery. I've been working all this time, but now it hurts to sit all day and I'm quitting my job in December. Does anyone have any advice for me?
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