How do you worry?
It is only natural that change and imposition, and the future itself with pain are difficult notions to accept of endure as the perception of our what may happen plays in our heads. Every procedure is greeted with the same expectation of hope and some improvement and we embrace disappointment through gritted teeth and look towards the next path of light.
Even when our condition itself mandates some surgical intervention that greener pasture is always in our thoughts if not the reality. As time goes by that realism of having to adapt takes precedence over what we thought the outcome would be and as a community that hope never fades and we all strive for some improvement. It is natural to worry and part of the evaluation process, where that threshold of continuing concern develops into depression differ for us all, as most believe that chronic pain and depression itself are inexorably linked.
Time has taught me to worry incrementally and address each element separately and face the imminent challenge before worrying about the next one, this is never easy, and I could see that the loss of my employment was an option in the future and attempting to keep that thought of just today that did become reality, understandably difficult.
My most recent reading looked at the concept of catastrophising, where we leap that middle order of incremental worry and go for the worst option possible and see that as the next logical step. Most of this is how we think and not reality, even if it were an option we need to adapt to the ideal that although one thing has not worked we must look for another with the same hope and enthusiasm or falter.
We as many, have progressive and continual disappointment and need to show that strength that we have and use every day to get through, we all do a good job and should acknowledge that to ourselves.
Take care and good luck John