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If you think; you’re the only one affected by your chronic pain –YOU’RE mistaken!

jj-from montrealjjj-from montreal Posts: 60
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:28 AM in Chronic Pain
Take my word for it, everybody around you is affected.

In my experience it is crucial; that everybody without exception; parents grandparents children – (significant other) who ever is directly involved in your immediate life
All have a sit down with your pain doctor and have them ask any question, let the doctor answer, believe you me it carries a lot more weight if the same words came from a doctors mouth, then yours.
I remember some of the question; my parents both in the seventies asking the doctor if I’m going to become a drug addict? My son asked if I was going to die, my wife just simply asked;
“Please tell me when am I going to get my husband back?”.
I will be honest with you; it was not easy for me to sit back and listen to them, to see the desperation on their faces. I never realized how much it affected them.
You know something; at the end of the day, my pain situation did not change, however;
Now when I take my pain killers in front of my parents I’m not questioned any more, when I have one of my flair ups and my pain levels are extreme my kids know, this will not kill me( leaving toys on the floor so I could trip over them will)
As for my wife, well let us just say; we are optimistic.
Understanding the situation with the “right” information is, one of the most important step in the recovery process
Remember; as bad as you feel a hug goes along way, they need it.

Keep smiling
A little back ground;
I’m a 48yrs old male, I have moderate to severe chronic pain everyday of my life for the past10 years,
I was diagnosed with; myelopathy, steno sis in the neck, severe D.D.D
At 37 I had to have a lamanectomy from C3 to C7 inclusive, do to herniated disc that affected my spinal cord. The doctors have made it very clear that there is real nothing left to try, medically.
Presently I can not feel with my hands, no sensation, I have pain from my head to my toes. I have been on every type of pain medication and all stopped working after a while
Now I take Lyrica and and medical marijuana
(My advice to the world ,” acceptance, never give up, keep your self occupied . get physiological help, just to put things into prospective. Try to smile)


  • i have to agree with yo on all off that.
    a few days ago my husband sat down and chatted with a few off my friends from here and i must admit it worked!!!
    i have noticed a change in his attitude towards me.
    it was a casual conversation but i think it made him sit up and realise whats going on.
    im glad it happened and i thank my friends for doing this.
    others should try it ...idid...and it defo works.

    LOVE P
  • the thing with our illness our backs etc is that no one can tell just how ill we are ..for example my brother in law had a MVA and is now wheel chair bound and has mental health problems .{he was a fit man with out any health issue before the crash} but people now treat him with respect .they will say things like .make sure that Stuart is OK and leave the stairway clear for Stuart etc.but even tho he is more disabled than me .he is hardley in any pain and enjoys life more than me.but no one {other than Kath} knows just how much pain and how hard it is for me to do the simplest of task}and i dont get any special dispensation...another example.i went to our locale swimming pool the other day and i took my walking pole with me .people held the door open ...people talked to me and i did not get any funny remarks when i pulled up in a blue bay in my car.i left it a week or so and returned to the pool minus the pole .no one talked to me and no one held the door open..strange how much notice people take of a walking pole ,,dont you think?
  • You are right about the whole walking pole or my cane as I like to call it. Unfortunately i never thoughtI would need it at the age of 32 but things happen. I don't always use it unless I'm going to be walking for a while or a longer distance than my leg pain and back pain allow. But it is funny the way people treat you different when they see the cane compared to when I don't have it but I'm still in the same amount of pain. I sadly even notice it around the house with my wife and kids, now thats sad. Especially since my wife had back surgery three years ago you would think she would understand a little more but its as if she forgets until the cane is out. Ahh how funny life is.
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