i just had fusion surgery jan 5th, L3-4. i am in tears because i read just a few posts and its everything i've been going through. i'm so happy this is normal, terrified at how long it will be and realizing that i have really been in the dark. my doc tells me nothing. my friends and family are up and down, i'm either doing too much or i'm doing too little. i feel the judgements everyday. my boyfriend is frustrated. i'm in hell and now i realize that it's not gonna get better anytime soon. i hate the percoset, it makes me sick and i still hurt. i have a herniated disc above my fusion point and i feel it. the doc said it would be ok, and it's not. my pain has always been on the left now its on both sides. god, i'm just randomly bitching here. i'm sorry. i just don't even know where to start. i'm in so much pain, mentally and physically and i just don't know what to do. i'm losing my life and i can't do anything about it!!!!