I know I have been posting down in Mind/body under depression. (I'm kind of a nut job) L)
I also try to find humor in whatever I can, so be that what it is, I've got a couple of ponderings I want to ask in a more direct manner. Not buried in some other post.
I'm a little past 48 hours into my trial. The single lead was placed on Wednesday at about 10:00 am. It took the PM 3 holes and about 4-6 attempts to get it in. He did some massive tissue manipulation as I have a wrong way dip in my spine and the clearances are very close making things very hard to work through.
Once it was placed they tested coverage and while they did not get "full coverage of my bad shoulder it was close.
Now I wonder what if anything others have experienced with cervical trials. Mine is VERY positional making it frustrating to get the full effect. If I set it and things are in the sweet spot. It is truly wonderful! I am in love. However I can not always find that sweet spot
My ponderance is that with a permanent version this will go away as things "scar" down. I know I am not the only one to go thorugh this, so, I need some input and thoughts on how much postional differences remain and for how long with the permanent version.
I can't help but feel some fear, what sane person would't carry a little fear and trepidation going into this?
I can't shake my thoughts that what if I let this happen and it does not work or something goes wrong. The other side is of course the thought that how can I possibly not do this? AAAAaaaaaaahhhh! OK, deepbreath. OK, I got it.
I want to think that this may indeed be MY answer. Not perfect, but it appears this will allow me to become more like what I used to be. I'm pretty sure the coverage I have will very likely allow me to work through my pains and while not eliminating them it will allow me to toss the Norco and manage with ITC's, perhaps, Neurontin, etc,
Is that not enough of a reason to battle thorugh my fears of surgery #5? :?