Hello, I have two torn and degenerated lumbar discs and had two more discs (midback and neck) ruined by medical malpratice. It has been > 6 months and I can still only sit for 5 min w/o pain in lumbar region and neck, and only walk a few hundred meters - sometimes up to 800 yards but cannot get buttocks to really work well together, and if I walk too much it hurts awfully for a week. My work involves sitting all week. I know I should be glad I can walk at all but - I lost an awful lot of my quality of life. I used to walk ten miles for fun, and four miles every day. Go traveling. Love to clean my apart.
I have had a very hard life, this was supposed to be the good times finally coming. Then this happens and the mishandling accident ruins me even more. Now all I have left is working in pain and incapacitation, alone, serving only to serve others - as a worker.
I have had to deal with all, all alone, even the days when I could not stand up straight or walk at all. No one there for me except to pick up medicine now and then (if I asked - and asked and asked - and believe me, when one really needs one's friends, one finds out that 90% of them are nothing of the kind). What reason is there to live when life is pain, pain, pain and I cannot even walk for real, am alone, isolated? I so envy horses. If they are injured, they are put to sleep but humans - who can feel and conceive the full depth of their physical incapacitation and know it will never change - we, we are forced to live. I feel like a ape in a cage, asked to do my tasks, otherwise ignored and left to my incapacitation, isolation, pain and grief - and yet expected to smile.