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An Embarrassing Question! :)

AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,671
This is so embarrassing. But, I will ask it anyway... :)

I honestly thought my leg pain was slowly but surely disappearing a couple months ago. Then, my husband and I had sex, and it seems like from that moment on.... ouch again! The pain has stayed for about 2 months now.

Does anyone know if certain positions can actually re-rupture a disc? I've had 2 lumbar laminectomies, and after this second one, sex seems to be painful the day or evening after.

Sorry... this is an odd question, I know. But, I wonder if we should be doing something different, or if we shouldn't be having sex at all. :(



  • I don't know, but I am interested know too.
  • I don't know if I can answer your question, but I can say that I haven't had sex in a long time. This is probably TMI, but even being on the bottom I hurt so bad I can't hardly get out of bed for 2 days afterward :(
  • My guess is that it is a nerve issue rather than a disk reherniation/herniation. I see your issues are with L5-S1. That area is most closely connected to the pudendal nerve and the entire pelvic floor. Weak pelvic floor muscles can cause symptoms of pain that feel just like a herniated disk. My guess is that your nerves in that area are already highly sensitized from being compressed and then from the trauma of surgery. When you have sex, it increases the blood flow to the area. It may be just enough to get those nerve sensations aggravated, or at least, more sensitized.

    But, as usual, ask your surgeon next time you see him, or call if it is really bothering you.
  • I'd like to know the solution to this dilemma also. To me, anything that bumps the pelvis around can cause pain before and after /:) . Perhaps it is a good idea to take something for pain 30 minutes prior ;) You gotta do what you gotta do :( They say the uninjured partner should "do all the work". I'll just leave it as that 8>
  • With the partner "doing the work" still doesn't work for me :( :''(
  • I understand. It does take two to tango :D
  • Thanks for the comments, everyone. I was surprised to see how many people answered this.:)

  • Really? :D Just kidding O:)

    This is something we all want to know but are too afraid/embarrassed to ask :)
  • I wish when the doctor says that you are allowed to have sex, he/she would pass out a sheet on "how to" after back surgery.
  • =))

    It's not that it isn't working! lolol

    It just takes 2 days to recover!!!
  • Hi Jay, I wasn't thinking something wasn't working..I mean..I'll just leave that one alone.. =))
  • I figure it's bad enough having back and leg pain, but the thought of not being able to... is even worse.

    I just got married 2 weeks ago, and having to tell my husband I can't have sex would be like telling him a bad joke. :) Can you imagine? "Oh ya, by the way - now that we're married, I should probably tell you... not only can I not do laundry, lifting items over 10 pounds or unloading the dishwasher; but the doctor also mentioned that I shouldn't have sex."


  • Congratulations on your recent wedding <:P I think things will work out, after all your fiancee knows what's going on but I understand this is not how you planned it to be. There are other ways to show affection such as hugging, kissing, holding hands, snuggling together ;). I certainly know how back pain throws a wrench into everything, and all we can do is work around it when possible. Are you traveling for your honeymoon?
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    That's the only way I know how to describe it. I try to not let my hubby know how bad it is. I agree with Jay. Even being perfectly still on my part it's still torture!
  • sex .is just another form of exercise .and you can injure yourself at the gym just as easily as you could injury yourself having sex with jim! {my little joke!}.so i would not surprise me at all .have you been to the doctors ?
    i would not be embarrassed there will be many on here wishing they could have sex! let alone brake something whilst in the midst of passion!i have not been able to manage sex for 2 years due to pain and reduced sensation in the married quarters..so get yourself checked out .then .well ..what ever .. take care
  • It sure would be nice to be able to have it without pain- it really kills any good feelings you get and then you can't hit the proverbial "home run". :|
  • OK, a confession to make. At times when the pain is really bad, I'd wake my husband up and demand for sex, and it has to be good, because i think something is released in the body, and pain will be minimized. With regards to position, side by side is best, with your bad leg on the top.

  • csp, the same thing happens to me. My husband and I went from what I/we felt was a "normal" amount of sex to maybe twice a month. We've tried different positions, every one leaves me with a severe nerve pain flare up for days after. I don't usually have pain during (natural release of pain relieving endorphins), but just the thought of how bad I will feel after has seriously killed my sex drive. Cuddling and snuggling is great but it's no substitute for the real thing, and doesn't really make either of us feel any better. I'm just hoping all this pain crap will be over soon...
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