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Having a horrible day and I just need to vent =(

Mandalina07MMandalina07 Posts: 22
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:32 AM in Lower Back Pain
I had a follow up visit today with my spine doctor, it was only the second time i've seen him because he is a workers comp doctor. I previously had my own spine doctor I was seeing on my own insurance. He told me that since the spinal injection didn't work that my next step is surgery. I do want to have the surgery (microdiscectomy on L5-S1), but I have to meet with the injection doctor on the 23rd and discuss with him if surgery is best. Then workers comp has to approve it which is a whole other issue. On top of the surgery on the worst herniated disc, I have to get spinal injections on the other two herniated discs (L3 and L4) They hurt really bad when I had them done, and I am not looking forward to 12 injections at once!!

The spine doctor put me back to work FULL TIME eventhough I told him since the injection on friday the pain has gotten worse and even the percocets aren't helping. He said I can't lift or bend but I have such a small work space I have to. Plus, my work space is definitely not conducive to my injury. I have to push myself around on grooved ceramic tile and my chair is old and the back doesn't even lock in place. I am pissed, I do want to go back to work but maybe a half day or work from home until I can at least get back to 50% of what I was before my injury! He did prescribe me Lortab but how am I supposed to drive 16 miles to work every morning while im high? lol

If the injection doctor agrees to me getting surgery then it has to be approved by workers comp and scheduled which would probably be late July. Sooo... I go to work for about a month only to have surgery and be out for at least another 4-6 weeks? Real smart.

Also, I have FMLA and have already used 6 weeks, by law you only are secured your job for 12 weeks so they can even terminate me if I do have the surgery and am not back within that 6 week time. I really could care less anymore, im really dreading going back to work because both my bosses were upset I was going to be out plus the one that snapped and cussed at me the day I left. I have been applying for jobs randomly but until I feel better there isn't much I can do =(

This whole thing is even making me depressed because I can't do anything for too long, I have gained weight because im not active, im completely bored all the time and I don't even know one day to the next if I have a job, how im gonna feel, etc. It's horrible!

Sorry to whine and complain on here but since none of my friends understand and I don't really talk about my feelings to anyone but my boyfriend I figured here would be a good place to vent. lol I appreciate whoever got this far. Thanks for listening =)

P.S. I think I need to get on some kind of anti-depressant, I am not an emotional person but I can barely handle all of the feelings im having and my boyfriend who works from home and is with me 24/7 is having a hard time dealing with my moodyness. Does anyone know how I would go about that? Do I need to have a psychiatric evaluation or see a therapist?? I do have insurance so do I just call one up?? I don't know anything about that but if someone has advice I would love to hear it!!


  • Sorry you are going through all of this. I know how it feels to sometimes feel like I should have a mental evaluation and that I am nuts, and that's all me. Why would my man want to stay with someone like me? Ect and the list goes on. I have been suffering for over 2.5 years, and then I decided that it was time to turn my life around.I believe that in order to feel any better, your mind has to REALLY want to feel better. I began changing the way that I thought to help change the way that I feel. I also changed my diet, and forced myself to exersize as much as my body would allow. I was doing spinal strengthening classes 2 times a week with my Neuro for nearly a year before I realized Hey! I am beginning to feel better. But there was something more that I needed to get myself back on my feet. So, I got a puppy. I was nearly on the verge of a wheelchair. Now that I have my puppy, I have to take it on walks, ect and it keeps my mind off the pain. I can now go jogging, swimming, bike riding, and hiking like I have wanted to in years! Not saying you should get a puppy, but you are not crazy. Maybe try to find something that is a doable hobby of some sort to help you. Excersizing as painful and hard as it was, has changed my life! I had gotten to the point where I couldn't keep a job and nearly didn't graduate college and pursue my dream. But now, I am a graphic designer for Betty Crocker and loving life! :)

    I am 22 years old and suffer from T1-T12 disk herniation, scoliosis, and reverse curvature of the neck.
  • If workmans comp is involved does that mean you were hurt on the job? If so I don't see how they (your company)mess with you.
    I really don't see how you can be fired for being ill, being under a Doc care and all that.
    I don't doesn't right that's for sure.
    Get Well,
    Two Lower Lumbar Buldging Discs andL5-L4 is reputured

    Meds(Lortab10mg/500 3 t.d.,
    Nabumetone, Lexapro, Allapurinal and Soma(at night)
    Age: 55 State: TX
  • Thanks, yeah it was ruled work related. I was only seen by the WC doc for 5 min each time. I told him I was in pain both times, I even broke down and cried in his office today because I was so frustrated trying to explain how I felt and how this is effecting me. He put me back at FT - 40 hrs, only restrictions were no lifting over 10 lbs. I can barely sit comfortably for a few min let alone all day without pain, yeah right! I know they shouldn't do anything but they are sort of incompetent at my work so I wouldn't put it past them to screw up! Thanks for the well wishes =)

    Oh and as far as being terminated I mean because i've used 6 weeks FMLA already and if I have surgery thats another 6 weeks FMLA. They could terminate me if they wanted to, if I go over the 12 week FMLA.
  • i am dealing with workers comp too and what a pain. i had to go out and get a lawyer because W/C didnt want to send me to a dr. so that is something you may what to think about. they will mess around and not call you back just hoping that you will just drop it and go back to work. yes your company can still can fire you hurt or not. i had a dr. just like yours sending you back to work not caring how you fill cause they are with W/C. i got a lawyer to help me with that and to help me get my benefits started when i was out of work. i just had surgery and it does get to you not beable to do anything while your hurting all the time. i have been out of work for 2 and half years. just stay strong and dont give in to W/C cause you do have rights but you have to be careful with it. good luck and hope you feel better.
  • it's 4 am. i'm on the floor, in pain, reading your story and i really feel bad for you. To have such back trouble and to have to contend with rules, red tape, possible job loss. poor working conditions. you need some help and i really feel for you. I'm no lawyer or dr. just a fellow pain sufferer who wants to help.
    That said here are my ideas......

    your pain, and the various drugs you have been given are enough reason for you to be upset. if you are on oral steroids they can cause confusion and depression. Pain killers can get you down. You sound like a perfectly sane, stable person who needs some help with her situation. I don't think you need to get involved with a psychiatrist at this time. What you do need is a dr. to guide you through this turmoil. My guess is that if you go to your primary care dr. he can help you with your meds. I would think his services should be covered by insurance.

    I would also contact a lawyer to guide you through this problem. He can tell you your rights and he can help you bargain with the insurance company regarding your care and compensation while you are not working. the insurance company is on the hook for your care. It was ruled a workers comp event so the insurance co. is on the hook. i think you are in the drivers seat, not them.
    keep us posted and know that we are behind you all the way :-C

    best to you, pete
  • Mandalina, Pete is right. Get yourself a w.c. lawyer. I did that. I called and found one who is really good, w.c. is all he does. He took my case for free, only gets paid if I win. Once he went to bat for me, w.c. was not so much "on the muscle," and I really was thankful to have someone who knew the system working on my behalf. So I hope you call and find one right away.

    Your frustration, anger, and sadness are understandable. Dealing with work, w.c., pain, uncertainty, even the weight gain. . .sounds like I was listening to myself! You aren't alone. Try to do some little nice things for yourself, get yourself a lawyer, keep writing here. They say to write anytime, and you will get love and support from those who know exactly what you are going through. It's been helping me, and I hope it helps you too. Take good care, Mandalina.

  • Hello Mandalina,
    I would suggest you get a WC attorney to represent you.I had a WC issue several years ago and my attorney was a life-saver.She advised me to see MY Drs as well as the WC Drs.She advised me to take care of myself and let her handle the case.That's what I did.I had insurance through my job and everything was turned in to them,then when my case went to court,part of the deal was,my employer had to reimburse my insurance company. I had a cervical fusion and I didn't wait on the WC Drs to "approve" anything.I too am in NV,so if you need to talk PM me.My attorney is in Carson City...Keep fighting...and take care of YOU Sagehen
  • I don't think you need flma if your injury is work related. flma is for a medical condition personal or family related not injuries caused by your job. I feel for you but I have some suggestions to help you feel better. Cymbalta helps calm the spine pain down and is a anti depressant. Chronic pain does cause depression. The next step is find a swimming pool and just get in and walk around, your pain will vanish. Another thing is to reduce the inflammation and exercising in the pool will help that. There are anti inflammatories too but you cant take them a week before any injections and they need to build up a few weeks before you will see any results. I swim a lot and I feel great in the water. Another thing while your at work I use those heat wraps you get at the pharmacy and apply them to your back, that will keep the muscles loose and reduce some inflammation too.
    2005-ACDF with Corpectomy at C3-C-5.
    2006-L4-L5 diskectomy.
    2009-Cervical laminectomy at C3.
    Steroid injections series x 4.
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