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What am I looking for?

sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:32 AM in Depression and Coping
I come to this site several times a day hoping for....what? Hope. Encouragement. Answers. Support. Understanding.
I read all the new posts. I try to offer all the above if I think it'll help someone. A lot of times I feel like I have nothing to add. I get depressed. It seems like everyday I have new complaints. New pains. I know that compared to most I'm very lucky. I'm able to get out and do things. To take care of my family. Why do I feel so depressed? I feel like giving up sometimes. I feel like I'm useless. I know that soon this mood will pass and I'll get back to being thankful for the life I have....soon.
I know this isn't making sense. I'm just venting, whining, and feeling out of sorts. Sorry.



  • U r soooo not alone!!! US "SPINEYS" all face the ups and downs with dealing with our problems!!
    That is what these forums are for...for people to vent and get things off their chest!! Just KNOW u r NOT ALONE!! God is and always will be right beside you!!
    KEEP THE FAITH AND NEVER LET IT GO!! May God bless you in your time of despair and depression...we all have been right where u are at!!

    GOD BLESS and keep ur head up!!! We r here to help pull each other threw these hard times!!

  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,846
    We have good days and we have bad days. Thats sort of the life chronic pain sufferers have been sentenced to.
    But with every down negative depressed times we all have those good happy days.
    Many times I think our biggest challenge is having the inner strength , support and positive outlook to get us over the hump days. None of us need help when things are going good.
    Over the years, I've tried to come up with ways to help get past the bad times. For me, its doing something for me, whatever that may be.
    - Blasting music real loud while being outside.
    - Going on my boat
    - Going down into my workshop and move things around
    - etc
    I know these are the actions that help me get past anything. So, really its finding something that will do it for you.

    And please, you never need to apologize. We are a family here, the Spine-Health family that looks after one another and tries to always help one another. So, think it this way, if there are times when you feel that all you are doing is creating posts about your problems, look at all the other times when you are there helping other members.

    We live on a two-way street in Spineyville.

    You watch my back and I have your back
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • Debbie, we are here for you! Know that we care, and will always listen, and if we have something to offer, offer it. Please don't ever feel you can't come here and "whine". We all do it!

    Take care! My thoughts are with you. >:D<
  • You've been an echo for many people here with this post. The very down days we have come along and we feel lost, not sure what to do with ourselves, nothing seems worth doing.

    It's not necessary to answer people's questions here when you're looking for answers yourself, or to offer support when you have no strength to give, or to lend hope, understanding or encouragement when that's really what you're needing. But it is necessary to come to us with your questions, ask for support, hope, understanding and encouragement because we're family and this family you have here understands everything you're feeling.

    Nobody can take this pain from you, but we can offer our hearts, our ears, our eyes, and our arms to give you big hugs. Vent, whine and feel outofsorts - we're here and know how you feel. I'm sending you a great big hug!

    Take care of yourself and I look forward to see you smile again.
  • O:) My mother's favorite saying -- This too shall pass! And as Dilauro said, Spineyville is here for you whatever mood you're in! I fight the fight about feeling useless also because I compare what I'm able to do now versus my former pain free life. That's normal -- we re human -- it's part of the condition. You have value every day, no matter if you're doing absolutely nothing. :D Hope you get to feeling better soon -- I know you will -- I think you deserve a nice pice of CHOCOLATE! OR a scoop of your favorite ice cream OR some big fat french fries -- think comfort food.

    Sending uplifting thoughts your way :) Take care,

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    Thanks. I know you're right. It just hasn't been a good day. I hope that you are doing well.

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    Thanks. I don't know what I'd do without you all. Hope you're having a good day.


  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    Thanks for being here to listen. It means a lot. Hope you have a good evening.

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    Thanks. I hope you know how much I appreciate you. The hugs really help. Hope you're feeling good today.

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    I've actually been telling myself that this too shall pass...and I know it will. One thing about feeling so low....I just about have to go up from here. Thanks for all the thoughts. Hope you're well.


    You're so right...I need chocolate ice cream in a bad way. lol.
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    I want you all to know how good it feels to realize that you're all here to come to and knowing that you'll understand. I'm sorry that you're all dealing with chronic pain. It does make you so much more sympathetic, supportive and understanding. I know that some of you have dealt with your problems for years. Thank you for listening and being here for me. I'll try to get out of this mood and leave you alone!
    I hope that you all have a great, painfree day.
  • Guess what? We won't let you... "leave us alone"!

    Just as you won't... "leave us alone", right?

    Right! :D

    Debbie... we need each other through these tough, tough times. We've been through the many ups and downs, the pain both physically and mentally.

    There are days where we find oursleves being the strong one, to lift another up. And, there are days where we are at our weakest and we need the strength of others to help us through.

    None of us like the feeling of being depressed, but we need to share that feeling and get it out. This is an area I've been having to really work hard on... expressing how I feel. I tend to bottle everything up inside... particularly my pain and depressing thoughts. I feel that I am burdening others, when I complain. But... that is not true at all. As much as I want to help others... that's how much others want to help me.

    I hope you are feeling in better spirits today.

    Please vent... anytime you need to. We are all here to listen and help you.

    Take good care.

    Tammy >:D<
  • Hi Debbie-what a thought provoking posting. I know that there have been may times I have looked on the site hoping to find a "quick-fix" for my spinal issues, and been left feeling disappointed in myself. The upside has been all the support I have seen from complete strangers to another struggling spiney, it makes me feel comforted to know people here do understand and don't judge-they give advice and understanding-then they pay-it-forward when they can.Big Gentle Hugs- Paula
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    I have been in a better mood today. My brother called me this morning and asked if I could trim his shrubs sometime (I've always taken care of everyones shrubbery and landscaping) so I did. I will pay for it tonight.... I'd say it'll be another long night. See, my family doesn't realize how much pain I have. I've always loved doing stuff for everybody. It's just so hard on me now. But then again, being outside all day and feeling like I'm accomplishing something really makes me feel better.

    How are you today? I've been reading your signature line and boy you've had it rough haven't you?! I'm glad you're doing so well with your recovery. I'm sure your exercises are making you get better quicker. I know if I just sat down here I'd be much worse. If I have a real bad day and lie around a lot I hurt everywhere! Sorry this is so long. That's one side effect of my pain meds. When I take a lot of them I talk, and talk, and talk, and.....lol. Thanks again Tammy.
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    I think that's my problem. I expect a quick fix. I come here several times a day hoping for some hint of a 'solution' or some miracle method I can try that has worked for someone else. There's always someone to show their concern, sympathy, and encouragement. It helps more than anything to have so many friends who understand. I hope you know what I'm trying to say. I can't put it into words very well.
    I hope you have a nice weekend.
  • We all stand in a circle on a mountaintop looking outward towards the sun.
    Those who need to sit form an inner circle and those who cannot even sit are at the center.
    Somehow we all manage to hold hands no matter how far apart we are on the mountain.

    That's what I like.
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    You have a better way with words than I do.

  • I just don't worry about the vowels, if you worry about where the vowels go, you'll never get past the beginning, and that's very important.

    Now, if you just counted all the vowels above, you have got a problem and missed the point which may or may not be there to begin with and another thing is that you should never ever worry about inserting pauses or take run on sentencesintoconsiderationwhenyoutypebecause if you do then the vowels get intheway andsuddenly your completely lostastowhat you were writingaboutin the 1st place!

    Now being in firstplace is a wonderful thing for some people andeven dogsonoccassion but not for peoplewhoare consumedby counting vowels...

    Actually, if your a great typist, it's better to just close yer eyes and hit random keys and hope for the best but i think we have enough politicians as it is...

    But ifyoureally want my opinion, just read what the spaces in between are saying andthen let me know'cause i've no idea...
  • Jim, you are so awesome.... Loved the first post, laughed my a$$ off on the second one, thanks :p

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    youreanut =))

    only kidding,
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
  • GOOD!
    Now to work on all the others here!

    Ya'll may not realize it but if I can make you smile a little from time to time, then that makes me feel better!
    Pass it on!

    Did i mention I'm starting to hate (well, minorly dislike) mowing? At least when it's really hot out. And I didn't even get a sunburn!
    I'm tired of being halfway between albino & clear!
    I could stand next to a polar bear and he wouldn't even notice!
    Unless he's in the water then it'd be all blub blub, scream, drown, blub, thrash, whine, etc...

    Sad but true,..

    some polar bears just don't like the water...;>)
  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    you have to get out of the shade to get a real tan. lol. Then again, polar bears are cute. 8}

    Thanks Jim. I needed the laugh. :))(
  • Your welcome, just send a signed blank check to my address...;>)
  • Encore... encore!

    =)) =)) =))

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    It's in the mail.
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