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chronic pain and travel

strakerstraker Posts: 1,851
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:32 AM in Chronic Pain
hi all ..as some off you know i have just returned from a planned visit to the isle of man to see my daughter ,,never again!!..i had to cut the visit short because i was {am } still in so much pain .the point of this post is .when you take away your home comforts like recliner /walk in showers etc .life fro the disabled becomes almost impossible.i have spent the last 5 days in agony and just wanting to come home .the short time i did spend with my daughter i had to spend it lay on my ex wife's couch! we have not being able to do anything like go for a meal out of a trip because i was too uncomfortable ..its not fair that this chronic pain robs you of small things like going on holiday i was so happy to get home to my house where everything is geared around me .it will take me weeks to get over this trip as my pain is sky high at the moment ..was it worth it ??? no!!


  • Straker, I'm so sorry to hear that your visit didn't go well, and left you in pain. May you find the relief that you need quickly, now that you're back home. I do know how you feel, my fam lives only 1/2 hour away, but even so, my visits are cut short, because I am too uncomfortable and the drive back home is hell if I stay too long.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • Yes I have similar problems visiting my family. They are in Connecticut and I'm in New Hampshire. This is about a three and a half hour drive one way. I already tense up when I have to do highway driving. Lifting my arms for anything increases my pain. It hurts to wash my hair in the shower! So that's another thing that increases my pain, having my hands up on the wheel for 3 1/2 hrs, even with no pushing or pulling. So by the time I get there, or back, I'm in incredible pain. I only like to go if my husband can go and drive for me but he works weekends, and my family of course plans parties and get togethers for weekends.

    You're also right about leaving the comfort of home. Around your own home you have coping mechanisms and strategies that you are used to so that you can get through the day with as little pain as possible, and you can't bring everything with you. Even sleeping on a different mattress or surface can increase your pain like crazy. I think my biggest problem is that my family expects too much of me, let's go here and there, let's do this and that. And instead of explaining over and over that I can't do it, I sometimes stupidly give in and just do what they want and pay for it in increased pain later.
  • Hey, buddy - I'm sorry that your trip hit you so hard. It totally sucks that you go on a vacation to see someone you love so much and it turns you into one big ball of pain. I hope you feel better soon. What did your daughter say about the visit?

    I remember last February I posted about having company come to our house for a few weeks and how much pain I was in when they left. A big part of that was that we didn't have enough bedrooms and my husband's brother planted himself in my recliner, sleeping in it every night and he made it his official place to be. The stress of trying to entertain is just too difficult.

    Take care of yourself, bud. I hope you starting feeling better soon.
  • i had to travel an hour in my car then 3 hours on a ferry then another hour in my car ,,so when i got there i was finished before i had started! and as for showering my mums shower is over her bath .and i have a walk in type .it was agony so much so that on my last day i did not bother to shower before i left to do the return journey {this is not like me i always shower before leaving the house {i must have looked like a tramp not had a shave and in my baggy tee shirt and baggy shorts and orange crocs i did look a sight! ..what a relief when 8 hours later i reached my house and could get in my bathroom!! but today i am so sore its untrue i hurt like hell
  • to be honest cath..because my daughter is 13 {going on 25!} her old dad is the last person that she wanted to see .she is at the shopping with her mates and hunting for boys stage so i could have done all i did on the phone! i spent most of my up time talking to my ex wife !
  • ~X( What a bummer! Happy you're back home and can get a little comfort.

    Is it possible for your daughter to come and visit you at your house instead of you tring to go to the isle to see her? I don't know how old she is but if she's of age and can make the trip to see you, it would be a nicer visit.

    I can't imagine being jostled about on a ferry for 3 hours (just shoot me).

    My sister wants me to come to visit her in Houston. It's 11 hours to New Orleans and then another 6 1/2 to Houston from my home here in Orlando, I used to fly but haven't in years -- can't get over the claustraphobic feeling. Anyway, I've been feeling a lot better the past month and am thinking of making the drive. I don't know what will happen to my sciatica in my left leg. I have this vision of my driving two hours and then stopping to get a motel room -- can you imagine how long it would take me to get there (LOL!) I can imagine what the inside of my care would look like with my bag of ice packs, heating pads, ointments, back supports, ten unit, etc.

    Straker, take care and maybe a swim will help relax you and take the edge off the pain. So sorry a trip for pleasure turned out so badly.

    Thinking of you and sending healing and comforting thoughts your way,

  • Wow, sounds like a huge disappointment! I can't imagine traveling like that at this point! I agree with Judy, can't your daughter come to YOU? I really am sorry you are in such pain, and I will pray that you are able to bounce back (haha) quickly!

  • is 13 .but she wont go anywhere without her mum at the moment so maybe in a few years she may visit on her own.we talk on MSN and the phone .
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,865
    I can remember some of my earlier trips and how much I suffered about arrival at the destination. Some times it would take 2 or 3 days before I was back to semi-normal and then on the coming home leg of the trip, the same thing

    Were they worth it to me?

    The standard trips were only because it gave my wife and my family some well deserved R&R. So, I tried to just suck it up and not show how much I was hurting.

    We flew to Italy in 2003 (one of the reasons was to see my son in Lucca) The plane flight killed me, for about 4 days I had to pace myself, rest/sleep for a couple of hours before we could get up on the road.

    I would do it again in a heartbeat
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • you are a braver man than me ..my friend!!
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,865
    just further along the total recovery cycle for Spineys.
    Straker, it does hurt to hear the different things you take on and which gives you pain. But your pain, is something we can share to everyone on Spine-Health.
    Things that are know to create problems, you can let people know first hand. And to me, getting up front first head information and knowledgeable is so very important
    Thank you for allowing me to get to know you
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • Talk about adding insult to injury...
  • You know... I really do admire you for putting forth the effort to see your daughter.

    We (your Spine-Health family) know... how much pain you battle with and I'm so sorry to hear your trip was miserable. I was hoping to hear some good stories.

    I'm glad you made it home safe and you didn't find yourself in a strange emergency room due to a slip or a fall.

    Keep up the good communication with your daughter via phone, internet, text messages, etc. Although she seemed preoccupied with her teenage stuff... she saw you on that couch and I'm sure it hit her heart. I can guarantee before she falls asleep each night, she thinks of you and will always remember this trip you made to see her.

    You're a good father, Straker.

    Rest up in that recliner and vent whenever you need to.

    Hope your pain subsides real soon.

    Tammy >:D<
  • your recliner, did you get yours fixed yet Straker? I sure hope so...
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • Straker - sorry that the trip really presented some obstacles for you. Unfortunately or fortunately your story may help others - being prepared for in increase in pain while on a trip - and making some plans ahead of time. There is nothing worse than trying to solve a problem in the heat of the crisis. I am so much more clear headed, if i plan before the emergency happens.

    Our family is planning a camping trip near NY city at the end of the month. The drive is what I am most worried about - it hurts to be in a car for long periods of time. This trip should take @ 8-9 hours. Sleeping on an air mattress, may be something else I need to think about too.

    Thank you for sharing your story - you got me thinking too - oh and my meds will be up near that time....i will need to plan ahead for that too

  • yes treveling is tough when youre in pain. i'm sure you'll return to "normal" soon. at least your daughter got to see you. after the pain abates i'm sure youll be glad you made the effort. one thought i had was next time you go, live it up. get a nice comfortable handicap room at a hotel with a pool. the daughter can come over for a visit. make it a vacation where you get to relax, swim, eat out and see your daughter.
    hope you feel better soon...
  • some kind and good comments made .re recliner its beyond economical repair so i am getting a new one !! its going to be a rise and recline leather monster !and its coming at the end of this month .Pete good idea re hotel and they visit me .but having spoken to my ex wife {and she saw the state that i was in } she does not want me traveling again and feels that its would be kinder to visit me ,{plus she has a lot more money than me and good health} she may be my ex but she was shocked to see me in such a lot of pain and not the man she once knew i think she was quiet upset to see my demise we have talked on the phone but face to face is a different matter if you know what i mean .
  • Hey Straker,
    I'm not laughing at your pain...just picturing you lying on your ex-wifes couch...for days....
    I know what you mean about the traveling,I am supposed to be going on a little trip to the bay area(SanFrancisco)next week,it's only 400 miles and I will not be sleeping on anybody's couch,but,I don't know if I can do it! I hurt so bad right now,it takes me a couple hours in the morning to get it together...but my niece is traveling 900 miles to get to where I am,so she can go on this trip,my daughter is so excited,my husband's been working bookoo overtime,and he's wound so tight anyway,maybe it will calm him down a tad,so....I think I would feel worse if I told them all no.So I will probably go...in the long run it will probably be worth it.
    I can be in pain there,or I can be in pain here,what the heck...maybe some good seafood is what I need.
    Take care and enjoy that new chair...Sagehen
  • nick of time as my back has gone in to overdrive re pain and ache ..since i have returned the lower back is on fire and the other 2 bulging disc that have not been operated on are giving me hell {i know this as they are above my original scar and i dont normaly have any pain there} but since i have returned my back is in a bad way and my right leg feels like it does not belong to me {you know the usual stuff burning cold/hot/painful foot and numb toes {ain't life fun!!},so my old knackered recliner is having to work overtime as i have not been off it since returning from my trip .the new recliner is the celebrity twin motor Hampton in antique brown leather ....i carnt believe that i am getting excited about a bloody recliner!!...lets just hope that my pain settles down to its normal level and this is just a blip ...but i am so glad to be home back to my lovely kind red head ..i have never been good at being away from home but when you are ill it make it even worse ...{has anyone heard from MING??}
  • I'm sorry the trip was such a bust. I know you were disappointed. Being able to IM you daughter must help you stay in touch tho.Isn't technology amazing :O) My son and I IM each other most nights, even if only for a short time. I'll bet you're looking forward to the new chair! Did you fly? One thing I have discovered when I fly from Oregon to Florida, clear across the US. Always multiple stops. I always request a wheelchair at the gate. They take you and any carryon luggage to the next gate you will be flying from. I used to feel funny about asking, but not anymore. Airports are so big, and I can't get from one gate to the next quick enough, or if I do manage to, I suffer for it. Flying when your neck and back hurts is not the best way of traveling. Take care friend, and hope you feel better soon.....haven't seen Ming lately either.

  • yes its arrived!! looking forward to many happy hours on it!
  • <:P :D :D I can picture you now lying in your new recliner, full of pain killers with a big smile of satisfaction on your face.


  • Sorry, Straker, you had such a bad experience while traveling to see your daughter. I had a similar experience the middle of May. I traveled from Florida to California to visit my son, which is approximately a 6 hour flight. I was in so much additional pain while there and after returning home the pain continued. My pain level is still very high and I'm only hoping to get back to the level I was before making this trip. It's just a bad situation to be in. Most people who never suffer chronic pain just don't realize what we're all going through. Hope your pain eases up for you. By the way, your 13 year old daughter is too young to travel alone, with all the weirdos out there today.
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