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New mum struggling to cope

AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,671
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:33 AM in Depression and Coping
Hi all
I'm new to the site and am actually writing this on behalf of my sister - could really use your comments and ideas please.
She's a new mum and is really struggling due to excrutiating back pain - she had it during pregnancy but has basically been house bound ever since baby was born 2 months ago. - There seems to be loads of info about pain during pregnancy but I can't seem to find much specifically post pregnancy. She was hospitalized 1 weeks prior to the birth as she couldn't stand / walk due to the pain.
She recently moved and doesn't know anyone in her new area so she's isolated and it's getting so bad that she feels suicidal.
She's having physio but there is little or no improvement and they don't seem to be telling her what's wrong / how long it's going to take to get better - if it ever will. The most I can glean is that it's 'muscular'. She says that all her weight seems to be in her hips and that she can't sit up / walk for more than 5 mins. - It's a complete nightmare with a little one as she has no choice but to put herself in positions that hurt her even more. - She can't even sit and log onto this forum at the moment as it's too painful sitting at the computer. She's been on pain killers and I think they took the edge off the pain - but that's about it. There's also now a possibility that they'll take her off them completely as they're concerned about her mental health.
Has anyone been through something similar? Any ideas / comments welcome.


  • :H Welcome to the forum. You are such a sweet sister to post this note on behalf of your sister. I know it is so helpful to her to have you act as your advocate as she has her hands full dealing with the new baby and such excruciating pain.

    I know there are mothers on this site who may be able to offer some advice on your sister's situation. You mentioned that your sister's problem is muscular -- has she had x-rays, MRI, etc. to rule out disc issues with her lumbar spine? If it is muscular she may benefit from deep tissue massage, myofascial release (another form of massage), a "tens" unit or acupuncture. I suffered with upper back pain for many years and it was totally muscular. It took awhile but I finally got relief through stretching, heat, ice and massage.

    Certainly, since it is so critical for your sister to get out of pain due to caring for a new baby, I would be sure to press her physicians to do more to help her out.

    Take care Silky and Im sure you'll get more posts about your sister's situation from our community here.

  • i am more concerned with the depression. i found certain painkillers made me depressed. my recommendation would be to see a psychopharmacologist in order to find the best solution for pain and eliminate the depression. when i stopped the narcotics my mood improved. another consideration too is that there may be an element of depression due to the delivery of the baby. depression can really increase pain levels. once depression is gone her pain level may drop.
    i hope thing improve

  • Some women have a tipped uterus.
    It can be normal,tipped forward or tipped backwards.
    some of the time a tipped backwards uterus may cause no pain but some times it will.
    During pregnancy a tipped backwards uterus can cause some pain in the back that can get very painful,and linger forever.
    In the old days they would say a women with uterus tipped backwards cant get pregnant...WRONG....
    From my own experience removing the uterus and cervix took that awful pain away. That is not why I had a hystro. but the everyday awful pain was gone after surgery.

    I have back pain from top 2 bottom these days but its not that pain that I believe your sister might be having. The way you explain it sounds oh so familiar.
    You are a great sis to try and help your sister.I have a sister just like you.

  • Thanks for all your replies, it's given us lots to think about. She hasn't yet had an MRI Deltalady and it sounds like there are a few other avenues that could be investigated by her physician.
    I never considered that the painkillers could be contributing to the depression Pete, she has actually just changed them so maybe that will help. THey're also talking about giving her counselling at home which I think would be of great benefit.
    I've never heard of a tipped uterus Ladybug - would they have picked that up on the ultrasounds through her pregnancy?
    I've passed all your comments onto her so she's armed to ask more questions when she sees her physio and physician. - Definetly think this site gives great support through the forums for when she can get online. - Things like this really make me realise how important my health is - and how debilitating back problems are.
    THanks again for your support
  • Silky,
    One might suggest that if her PT is related to a muscular problem that in itself may well be the cause and over time and the correct procedure this will get better. Every birth is a physical experience and can in itself create temporary problems; unless her history had some specific back specific problems no investigation may be initiated.

    This is a life changing time even with existing children and the continuance of pain never easy to endure once the birth is past, you are being supportive and that is what she will need right now as well as practical help, pain is one thing, pain and a new baby requires special care and attention.

    With new experience come extra concerns everybody has many issues to deal with at this time and every adjustment a seemingly difficult barrier. Hopefully this episode will pass and the joy of children eventually shines through, you are the sister we would all like and doing a fine supportive role.

    My niece is due to have a baby soon and my own tentative experience of three children will again be called upon, wish me well I may need it.

    Take care, John
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