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Pre-op depression - bad mood and no motivation

Cath111CCath111 Posts: 3,702
edited 06/11/2012 - 7:40 AM in Back Surgery and Neck Surgery
I'm so cranky today and although I don't really feel depressed per se, I'm in one of the worst moods I can remember. My patience and motivation are zero and I feel like if someone around me makes one wrong move (including my puppy) I'm gonna lose it on them. My concentration is also extremely short.

I feel like I have a lot to do, but luckily I've warned my at home nurse (my MIL) how I'm feeling and she's told me that she can take care of everything and for me to rest today. She's an angel. But I just hate this horrible feeling I have in my head.

Do you think this is normal? Has anybody else experienced this the day before their surgery?



  • It's the stress Cath. Even though you have done this drill before with past surgery. You still have the stress, apprehension, fear, concerns, etc...

    Take some deep breaths. Try not to think so much about the surgery. Easy to say I know. You're stressing yourself out and need to let it go.

    It's ok. Just kick the dog or the SO, whichever is convenient... LOL.

    I'm kidding on that btw. Please don't ban for my post. Ok grumpy? ;-)

  • It's odd because I'm not consciously thinking about the surgery very much, so maybe it's a subconscious thing.
    Please don't ban me for my post. Ok grumpy?
    Thanks for making me smile. You sounded just like my brother (which in this case, is a good thing).

  • Dear Cath,

    Yes, what you are feeling is 100% normal.

    Do you have any anti-anxiety medications you could take?

    It's not uncommon for doctors to prescribe these, prior to surgery.

    I felt the way you are feeling right now, just before I had my hysterectomy. I wound up calling my doctor and he prescribed two Valium pills for me to take.

    See if Valium or Xanax is on your no-no list of medications to take. If they aren't listed, I would call the doctor and ask for something. It will take the edge off.

    Are you in the mood to listen to music by yourself? Sometimes, that is a great escape. If you go to YouTube and want some humor, look up Mumbles Drive-Thru and the other Mumbles stuff. Picture yourself going to a drive-thru and talking like that. If you're really agitated... go to a drive-thru and do this with your mother-in-law. A good laugh can get rid of frustrations REALLY quick.

    Keep us posted with how you are doing. You're in our thoughts and prayers.

    Wishing you peace of mind,

    Tammy >:D<
  • I'm sorry that you're going through so much but obviously I understand.

    Let's hope it is worth it.
  • I have some Xanax and just took one. My MIL is taking me out for Mexican food (my comfort food from heaven).

    Thanks for the thoughts, my friend, it's a comfort to know I'm not alone, although not enough of a comfort to keep me from being cranky.

  • I think this is normal. I'm telling you...a few days ago I was ready to Kung Fu Panda everyone around me!

    Please know I'll be praying for you through your procedure and look forward to chatting when you're back home and up to it!

    Maybe we'll meet in chat tonight since you're procedure is tomorrow.
  • I was thinking about askng for something myself. I'm trying to keep busy with work and chores and amazingly I think my husband is trying very hard to be nice and helpful. I am worried about the morning of my surgery. I am scheduled for 11:30 and my surgeon is doing a 3 level fusion before me so I am sure I will be pushed back. I can't imagine how anxious and hungry!!! I will be that morning. With any luck they will have some happy drugs for me to take while I am waiting. Would be nice if they let me go to my room before surgery instead of sitting in a waiting room - wishful thinking!
  • Enjoy your mexican food and Xanax, too.

    The combination of both, will take the edge off.

    I might grab my tushie pillow tonight and log into chat, myself. (I haven't chatted on here yet and am looking forward to it).

  • DITTO!!!

    Holy cow, I've been ranting and raving and NOT acting like myself at all since last night. It was like a switch got flipped and I lost all my patience and have been really on one since. I feel like my head is going to explode (that's probably the blood pressure though)

    Just waiting for now. The hospital is calling later to give me the time to come in tomorrow.
  • I was in a really bad mood the few days before my surgery. I felt like I had loads to do and no time. Plus all the idiots around me who kept asking if I was nervous. Nervous... OMG!!!
    I think part of it is knowing that you can't do anything after the surgery for such a long time. In the end I just opted out and left the housework and most of everything else too!
    Look out for yourself. My surgeon told me that now is the time to be selfish. Good advice that I have taken on board as much as possible.
    Good luck by the way.
  • Hey don't sweat the small stuff. You are "on deck" and next up to bat. It's very normal to have any range of emotional response from one end of the spectrum to the other. When I get into this type of mood I like to take my iPod and head phones and just turn up the volume and tune out the world for a while.

    You have a great support team and nothing to be worried about. Think about how great it is going to feel tomorrow when the anesthesiologist says "I'm going to give you a little something to relax" and you feel the meds start to work their magic in your veins.

    We will be here waiting to hear from you or someone who can give an update on your surgery and progress. As the great Franky (who goes to Hollywood) says ... RELAX!


  • I'm sure I would feel the same the night before surgery. It must be very stressful, but you are trying to carry on, so just feel horrid.
    Have a lovely meal out with your MIL (she sounds lovely, and understanding). I wish you all the best for tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you and look forward to hearing from you the other side of surgery, once you are on the mend.
    Tomorrow is the day you have been planning and waiting for. Just try to relax and let the surgeon do his thing.

    I'll be thinking of you too. Hope that your hardware removal is straight forward, and that you'll be surprised how good you feel afterwards.

    Take care, both of you.
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,732
    And I was going to post, I had a long post going when my dell tech. called to install my new security and I lost it all! ~X(

    So I'll start over. I have felt the same or worse. And yesterday my surgery scheduler called to fax me the pre op appoints.
    This morn. I didn't want to get out of bed. And when I did, I feel like you, but also depressed, confusion, can't concentrate, (or don't want to), everything agitates me, I have no motivation at all!
    I've been in a funk every since I decided to have this surgery. This is # 6 and I had told myself, no more! But this is new. A XLIF. And the way it was explained to me. It seemed like a no brain-er. And still does.
    I've been trying to cut back on my meds for this surgery. But now may not be the best time. 1 of my meds are diazepam, (valium) 5 mg. 2 x a day. And I've only been taking 1 before bed. And skipping the morning dose. It sounds like maybe I should be taking both of them in the morn.
    Good luck, Jim
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,732
    You mentioned a couple that I forgot. Head ache coming out of my neck. and my issues are lumbar!
    And how could I be tired? I slept 9 1/2 hrs?
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
  • cath,being grumpy is normal! and in my experience the people who love you the most are the recipients of the rath----it is nerves, and planning, and preparing--from the time we first go to the dr. through all the tests,injections,meds,etc-to zero hour---thats alot for a person to deal with!all of us spineys are pulling for you,and when you wake up in the recovery room it will be the beginning of a new life of less pain!
  • :) :) :)

    Thank goodness there's food to soothe the savage beast in us when we're feeling funky. Rant on honey! Just the stress of it all getting to you.

    Best thing is seeing the anesthesiologist coming toward you -- they should wear wings!

    You're in my prayers for a successful surgery -- take care of you and let us know how you're doing after the surgery as soon as you're able.

  • I know I'm always grumpy when I'm stressed. For me the worst part is when I start second guessing myself about whether to have the surgery after all.

    Best of luck for your surgery tomorrow. It will all be over before you know it. Hope it all goes smoothly.

    Amy - good luck to you as well for your hardware removal.
  • no need to stress. sit back. relax. youll be having a nice sleep. plenty of nurses and doctors to walch over you. think of it as vacation. best of luck

  • I'm only online today during my breaks - yes, I totally allowed myself to be scheduled to work from 9-9 today thinking that it will keep me busy. I guess it's ok as long as I don't bite the patrons heads off! LOL

    I won't even get home before I'm supposed to not eat or drink anything. Oh well - my stomach is doing so many flip flops that I don't think I could eat if I wanted to.

    I did get the call - 7:30 a.m. Mountain Standard Time.

    Thanks all for thinking of me. I'll have DH bring in his laptop so I can get online in the hospital. My laptop decided yesterday that it didn't want to access internet or turn on unless it is plugged in. I usually do not sleep at all in the hospital, I don't really watch tv and I know I'll not be able to read. SH is my lifesaver!
  • Hi Saltzworks,

    I wish you the best tomorrow and hope you feel much better with your hardware removed.

    I agree about trying to sleep at the hospital... I have always had a hard time, too.

    We'll look forward to hearing how you are doing, once you are able to let us know.

    Best wishes to you,

  • It's really good to hear all your stories. Basically, it sounds like we're all the same when we're getting closer to surgery time.

    My surgery got moved up to 3:30pm instead of 1:30pm and I wasn't as po'd as I thought I'd be. Doris Day keeps singing Que Sera Sera in my head. I wish she'd shutup. I decided that I'm going to have a single piece of toast at 7am tomorrow just to keep my stomach from making those horrendous noises when I get to the hospital at 1:30.

    And thanks to all of you that reminded me of the anesthesiology angel that comes and makes you happy and carefree while you're waiting for surgery. She's the same one I had for my ACDF and is a wonderful lady.

    I wonder how I'm going to sleep tonight. Jim, I know exactly what you mean - I've been sleeping over 8 hours a night and I'm constantly exhausted.

    Anyway, thanks for sharing and the kind words. I'm thinking about all of you who are facing surgery soon and hoping all goes well. It'll be nice to touch base on the other side, my friends.

  • I feel so much the same as Cath. My surgery is scheduled for Monday, January 11th and I am going through the same emotions! I think my family thinks a demon has possessed me. I am totally not acting like myself and quite frankly I would not want to be around me! Good luck to you and let us know how you are doing.


    January 11, 2010- TLIF L5-S1.
  • I had a MicroD over the summer and mother-in-law was a saint trying to help but at one point the stress of urgent surgery, trying to tie up loose ends at work, dealing with insurance companies, doubting myself over whether I had picked the right doctor and gotten enough opinions, having inlaws over, not being able to do the stuff I normally do (I was an exercise fiend), and what not, I was on the last nerve (though my puppy is always able to cheer me up).

    I'm headed in for surgery and some days are worse than others. It's a revision MicroD at this point and waiting to see doctor for one final check up before scheduling it (new doctor) and I have days where I don't need to hear about how I have to be careful . . .I know I do but until the surgery stuff has to get done and work still has to be done b/c it pays bills and it keeps me distracted from the fear of surgery.

    It's ok to be crabby, we will all still like you here.
  • Cath,

    The stress is normal before surgery. Of course it is late when I see this thread so hopefully you are fast asleep by now. Are you sure about that piece of toast? You know I have issues chewing gum and saved a piece I chewed the day before and was chewing prior to surgery to calm me down. Almost didn't have surgery over that gum. Who would of thought, had a good 5 hours work on it. Anyway, hope all goes well tomorrow and let us know when you can. Take care.

  • Praying for you both this morning.
  • Thank you Jelly :)

    It's been interesting so far this morning.

    First we get a call just as we are to leave the house - the Dr. has an emergency and I need to wait until probably 9:00 before I come in. It's not bad, only an hour and a half and I thought, yeah, I can take my daughter to school and then get to the hospital.

    Well, that didn't last long. About 15 min. later they called again to say come on in, he's going to work on my first.

    Now I am in the waiting room at the hospital waiting for the page to go in.

    Can you say NERVES!!! I'm sweating through my shirt and my light jacket. My stomach is rumbling like nobody's business too.

    Better get offline and talk to the DH for a bit.

  • Don't know if you will get a chance to read this before your surgery, but

    take a deep breath, and put yourself into their hands to deal with your problem. Soon, it will be behind you and you'll be telling us all about it and how much better you feel.

    Chat with you soon.
  • Well, thank you all so much. I guess everybody who's facing surgery goes throught that crabby stage so it's nice to know I'm not abnormal. LOL

    Tamtam, I didn't eat any toast. I didn't and won't eat anything at all. I'm just happy that I can have my morning coffee. If they took that away from me - boy, talk about crabby!!!

    DNice, thanks for liking me anyway. LOL

    Jellyhall, thanks for the prayers. That always makes us feel good.

    You all are so wonderful and I'm blessed to have you all to come to when I need some help. I'm feeling strangely calm today and I think that's normal, too. It's finally here and I'm ready.

    Thanks again, my spine friends. Take care and I hope you all are having a good day.

  • So glad to hear you're calm today. It won't be long now. Will be praying for you! :)

    2009 Foraminotomy C6-72010 PLIF L4-S1Multi RFA's, cervical inj, lumbar injLaminectomy L3-4 and fusion w/internal fixation T10-L4 July 17Fusion C2-C5 yet to be scheduled
  • Catch you on the 'flip-side'.

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