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Was it done on purpose?

miammia Posts: 72
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:42 AM in Matters of the Heart
Hello,I guess I just need to rant and vent a little bit.I feel kind of strange saying this out loud so I'll write it here,maybe someone will read it and help me.
My d/h (dear husband)has a small thermal blanket he keeps on him in his chair in living room.No problem there.He uses it every night,still no problem.He gets up to go to bed and the blanket ends up in the floor.That's my problem.I have asked him repeatedly to please pick up the blanket.Put it on the couch,in his chair or on a bed somewhere but PLEASE do NOT leave it on the floor as I almost end up in the floor every night along with it!
Well, it finally happened on Friday night/morning.I was at pc at 4 a.m. from just can't sleep well, I got tired so got up to go to bed and yes,I didn't look very well,it is dark and down I went.
My feet got tangled in the blanket and I landed on knees and elbows.I got some scrapped skin from elbows and I am so sore now after attending a wildlife dinner(working) for his church,on Saturday.I can hardly move.I know it's just stoved up muscles.
I would feel it if it were more but I am so hurt that he doesn't care enough to pick up the stupid blanket!That hurts me worse than my body right now and I am hurting pretty bad.Close to going to er but not quite.
He apologised in a round about way.He told his sister he left it in floor and I fell and that he was sorry he left it in floor.
He is acting like I should be fine,no soreness or anything.I am having to keep my walker close by because I don't feel steady right now.I can't use my cain as my strong arm is hurt worse.
I am so angry and hurt by him.He did pick up blanket last night and put it on the couch.I live in a small 2 brm so there's not a lot of room anyway,so we need to pick/up after ourselves.
o.k. I am done,I complained,don't feel any better yet,just so darned hurt he doesn't care enough to take care,not just for me but he could have been the one to fall too!
Thanks for listening,pain free day n nights sent your way~~~~



  • I'm sorry to hear you fell. My husband left his black shoes on the front mat and made me trip all the time but when he saw the pain I had after he never did it again. I hope you can arrange to have your husband to come with you for a talk by your PM Dr. It straightened my husband up thinking I could just get over it and get back to work. I don't think he left it on purpose but for sure he'll never leave it on the floor again. I have a small lamp on all the time because I get up all times through the night. I hope you're feeling better soon. Take care. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • mia - I feel for you, I have the same issue with my hubby :(

    We share a small office and each and every day, several times a day I trip over his office chair that he refuses to push in - I have explained it to him 100000 times - makes no difference. This is just one of the many things he does/does not do each day that makes our home a land mine for me.

    Charry idea is a excellent one!

    I have taken mine to every appt. though. I think I am married to a jackass :O

    But hopefully yours is not like mine and he will "get it" and see it as it really is soon! :)

    L1 - S2 "gone" useless in 1 way or another. DDD. RA. Bone Spurs. Tons of nerve damage/issues. Stenosis. Both knees replaced. 50 yrs old. I had a great fall (hence my user name) at age 41 and it has been a domino effect every since.
  • Mia, it's absolutely okay to vent to us, I'm just sorry it didn't make you feel better after. I know how you feel about hubby not picking up after himself, it's so frustrating, and makes the situation even worse when you end up hurting because of it. Maybe if you move the blanket every night, away from the chair, like maybe fold it up and put it away in a closet or something on the way to your bedroom, he might get the point and start picking it up at the end of the night? But, hopefully, he already has got it, and it won't happen again. I hope that you feel better and recover quickly!! Take care.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • I'd do what i do with the kids, they're for ever leaving things lying around that i trip/stand on, so they get one warning then in the bin it goes or if it's expensive they lose it for a week.
    Tell hubby if he ever leaves it lying around again, you'll throw it in the bin, I bet he'll remember then.
    Hope you recover quickly.
  • Hello everyone, thank you for posting back with the ideas for me.Well, he did it again last night!I woke up around 1 a.m. and going very slowly (in case) and there it was...on the floor in front of his chair!I couldn't believe my eyes.
    I picked up the blanket and put it on the couch far from his chair.I haven't said a word to him as yet,I don't want to say something I can't take back....I am so angry and hurting in my heart.My d/h goes to the same pain managment office.He has a bad back and knees.
    He knows all to well what I am going through which makes it harder for me to understand why and how he can do this?!Maybe he thinks he hurts worse or something?He had surgery about 10 to 12 years ago and mine was postponed indefinately.
    Anyway, when I think I can talk and not yell I will have a talk with him.This hurts me so much it's almost a physical pain.
    Please don't get me wrong,he is a very good man and helps me a lot but he also acts (a lot of times) like he has no clue what's going on with back pain.I am totally lost.Thanks again for letting me vent and the helpful ideas.
    I am calling Doc 2day about doubling up on some pain meds,stomach,elbow and both knees,with a headache of course.Thanks again @) ~X(

  • It's really frustrating when you feel like your feelings don't matter.
    When you have calmed down I would talk to him about how his actions have made you feel
    and then...
    I would give him one last warning then throw that damn blanket in the bin! :D
    Sorry to hear your pain, it always get's worse when your feeling stressed.
  • I would sure find a place that made it a PIA for him to go get when he wanted it.

    Maybe you should get a roll of stickers and tell him every night he folds the blanket and puts it on the chair as a good boy should you'll give him a sticker!

    Since he has back and leg pain, why in the world would he place it somewhere that is hard for him to pick it up too?
  • I feel that I am just as responsible if not more, for ensuring that there are no hazards to myself in our home that pose a risk to me.

    I'm the one who knows what is hazardous to me.

    I'm the one who will fall or be hurt.

    I'm responsible for me and to expect others to feel the same way, seems like an unfair burden to place on them. If others won't help or don't wish to make it a point to help me, it is still my responsibility to take care of myself.

    Sorry that you fell. I hope you feel better soon.

  • I agree with Wrambler. I think I would put it in the upstairs closet for him to go and get everytime he doesnt pick it up. It is hard for me to understand how he can forget, after you fell once. Or maybe saftey pin it to the couch so it doesnt fall off? Or treat him like a child and get the mitten grippers and put them on the edge and attach to the fabric so it wont fall on floor? :?
    I hope you dont fall again. Take care, and vent away here, when you need to. We all understand. Have a good night, maybe shuffle through the house so not to trip over something. >:D< Hugs, Robin
  • Yes,I agree it's my responsibility also to watch out for things concerning me.He sleeps in a lift chair mostly for his back,when he gets up during night he drops blanket by chair and can reach it eaily when he sits back down.I think that's why.We discussed this and since the blankie has been on the couch.
    Thank you for all suggestions.We have nightlights all over the house,a trailer actually but we have them everywhere so we can see.It was a dark night and I wasn't fully awake so I guess I can blame myself as well.
    I saw doc and he said my bone in knee was bruised but would be ok.Elbow has scabbed and almost healed,so am better.Now go to doc 22nd to have date set to remove SCS.Then I will be better even more.
    Thanks again my friends, gentle hugs...p.s. men do seem to stick up for each other***~
  • Well, saw my pm doc and he said I bruised my bone @ my knee.Nothing major sot hat's good.The elbow is healing up icely now too.Everything seems to going along ike it should now.I of course am more aware as I should be and make sure all nightlights are burning.I try to wake up more before moving around too.

    In 2 weeks I go in to discuss removing my SCS,will be better with it out.Thanks again for letting me vent...gentle hugs~
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