Welcome, Friend!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Veritas-Health LLC has recently released patient forums to our Arthritis-Health web site.

Please visit http://www.arthritis-health.com/forum

There are several patient story videos on Spine-Health that talk about Arthritis. Search on Patient stories
Protect anonymity
We strongly suggest that members do not include their email addresses. Once that is published , your email address is available to anyone on the internet , including hackers.

All discussions and comments that contain an external URL will be automatically moved to the spam queue. No external URL pointing to a medical web site is permitted. Forum rules also indicate that you need prior moderator approval. If you are going to post an external URL, contact one of the moderators to get their approval.
Attention New Members
Your initial discussion or comment automatically is sent to a moderator's approval queue before it can be published.
There are no medical professionals on this forum side of the site. Therefore, no one is capable or permitted to provide any type of medical advice.
This includes any analysis, interpretation, or advice based on any diagnostic test

finding an unexspected surprise

jayhawkjjayhawk Posts: 1,032
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:42 AM in Back Surgery and Neck Surgery
10 days post op 360 L4-5 fusion that was complicated. I am the type that cleans/organizes before I go to bed, won't go to bed with a dirty kitchen, organizes the night before, puts on a bit of makeup even when I go to the gym, and enjoys putting coordinated outfits together with a cute hairstyle and coordinating assessories.

This surgery threw that to the curb. While in the hospital, I didn't even know I had hair, and no one else seemed to notice either. So after countless days in the bed, with transfusions, breathing treatments, moriphine, etc., I had dreadlocks coming off the left side of my head. I looked alot like Medusa. I kept saying I didn't want visitors, I was too sick and on too much moriphine. My family~my brothers, sister, sister-in-law, and one of my dearest girlfriends didn't/wouldn't listen!

They showed up regularly! :-) I would groan, as I really was at my worst and very sick! They helped me walk to the bathroom, reach things and watched over me as I slept.

At the time, I was horrified! Now I understand what a gift it is to have family and friends who love you and are there because there is no way they can stay away!

This weekend was my first weekend home~Friday was only my 2nd day home! Again, I said, please no visitors, I'm just not ready. Oh, did I mention, that I look like I've swallowed a watermelon? I have an unbelievable amount of swelling. So no cute PJ sets for me~they don't fit. :(

Again, no one listened to my "no visitors". My little sisiter showed up Friday night with 7 bags of groceries and her PJ's! :-) My daughter came home after staying a week with a friend while I was in the hospital. Everyone wanted to be close to me, but I had to be laying down in the bed. So they brought in chairs, hung out with me, held my hand when I cried due to the pain, waiting for those 30 minutes to go by before my next round of pain meds. My daughter and sisiter made a huge palet on the living room floor, mattress, blankets, pillows, comforters, stuffed animals. My bedroom is directly off the living room floor, so they can see me (and watch over me!) My sister and daughter slept there and my hubby on the sofa. All so close to me (the other bedrooms are on the other side of the house).

Last night, my daughter wanted to sleep with my so bad. I am just not ready. So she and my hubby, one of the dogs and one of the cats slept on the palet. This morning I asked if they were going to put it back and they were both horrified! They have decided they will sleep there until "I am better"! They think they won't be able to help me if they are in the bedrooms on the other end of our house!

As I walk through my home, it looks like a child and a man are in charge! :-)

What am I learning? I am learning that all the love and insistance of "family time", "family dinners", "family game night" etc are all coming back to me in the form of unconditional love! :-) My job is to stop pushing this love away amd allow others to do for me!

I am learning, it's OK if I don't look like me, swollen, large, ratty hair, sunken eyes, haven't showered in 10 days. It just doesn't matter! They all love me and temporarily aren't seeing the matted hair! :0

I'm learning it's Ok if my house looks like a child is in charge.

I'm learning that there are many ways of doing things and it's ok if there is a mess afterwards, take a deep breath and let go!

I am learning the true meaning of unconditional love!

I know my story scares many of you who are waiting for surgery. This is why I wanted to share this part of my journey also. To show that there is a silver lining in every journey..... Shari


  • What a beautiful story.And what a great family you have.You don't find that very offen.Just remember after you get better give then a hug and kiss for us for taking great care of you

  • From bad comes good. When we are tested we rise to the occassion. Your family was tested and the cream sure did rise to the top!! You should be proud of them and they should be proud of themselves.
  • Awe thanks Jim and Kris! I really am blessed and I truly believe things happen for a reason! i'm beginning to see the light!

    jim~ I promise to hug 'em and tell them thank you! What a wonderful comment for you to have left! :-)

    Here's to a great Monday! Shari
  • What a beautiful story! You are obviously loved very much and I'm glad you're accepting that love and "letting your hair down", so to speak. Thanks so much for sharing this with us. Wishing you a speedy recovery! :)

    2009 Foraminotomy C6-72010 PLIF L4-S1Multi RFA's, cervical inj, lumbar injLaminectomy L3-4 and fusion w/internal fixation T10-L4 July 17Fusion C2-C5 yet to be scheduled
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,730
    I didn't know my wife had a twin sister! Don't sweat the small stuff. Enjoy the love! >:D<
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
  • You are truly lucky to have such a great family and friends!

    I've found it's been hard to ask for help and also insisted on no visitors. It's always those wonderful people closest to us that ignore us and, in the end, make you feel truly blessed to have them care and give so much.

    Wishing you a speedy recovery.

  • for your very encouraging and lovely story.
    I guess when the cards are down, that's when we learn what things are really important.

    I know that my family will look after me well too. They are already showing that, especially on days when I feel an emotional wreck because of all the anxiety about surgery.

    Keep moving on in your recovery journey, and remember these days. Once you have moved on, away from them, you will have some special memories of how much they loved and cared for you.

    Keep healing
  • Shari, you amaze me. You have found what time amidst your pain to see love, to embrace it, to share it, and to realize...love is the greatest gift.

    You have a wonderful family! It seems they are all there to make sure you are not alone and that is something to hang your hat on...that you are a success.

    With each passing day, things will get better.
  • That is so wonderful to have such an amazing family! I'm in awe of you. Unconditional love is all I read in your post. You're truly blessed. Get well soon. Take care. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • :D :D Your story makes me believe that there are angels on earth -- all around! You are truly blessed to have such a loving, warm family.

    Take care of yourself and rest,

    Happy healing,

  • Life is Magical is it not?

    What a lovely story. Thank you for sharing.
    You have taught your family some great lessons along the journey. And the journey continues to teach.

    You have obviously built a strong BRICK home. Now, you must sit back and enjoy the strength it offers you. (And of course you do know I do not mean materialistically.)

  • Thanks for sharing and yes, you are truly blessed with a wonderful supportive family. You've given them so much and they appreciate it by being there for you.

    I was blessed by beautiful friends who called in every day and kept my house clean and helped with the dogs. Initially I found it hard to accept this help because I was brought up to be independent. I've been able to show my appreciation to my friends as best as I can.

    I hope your recovery goes smoothly from now on and please let us know how you're going.


    XLIF L2-4 20.8.15
    ALIF L4/5 2009
    Laminectomy/discectomy L4/5 2008
Sign In or Register to comment.