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Lockjaw, or can't post syndrome

WramblerWWrambler Posts: 1,588
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:43 AM in Depression and Coping
Anyone else get this way?

I know I am not doing well when every time I try to post I delete it and don't.

I see my shrink on Thursday, so I hope to get some inkling of what we can try next. He mentioned he wanted to try something else back in January. Both of us agreed we did not want to go there in dead winter as I need to do a taper off of Lamictal before going on the "new" med.

I was having trouble before losing Chewy; that just put the icing on the cake. At least I know that this extra depression and feelings of loss are "normal".(still miss him) I know it was his time and we had reached the end of the journey, just not ever ready to say goodbye.

I don't know if I mentioned on here, but it seems so tragic that so many people, pets, etc; seem to fight their way through a long rough winter then just go when spring finally breaks. For the last three years we have lost an aunt, an uncle and Chewy, all on Easter weekend.

I told my wife and friends next year I am not doing Easter anything.


  • I am so sorry that you loss chewy.I know how hard it is to say goodby to a pet. It seem so sad that they alway go in the winter instead spring. All of mine when in winter to a few weeks befor spring. So if ever you need to talk I am here.

  • I'm sorry to hear of your loss of your family and pup at the same time each year at Easter. I hope all goes well with your Dr. appointment and your new medication trial. Take care of You. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • I am so sorry about your Chewy----there is a site called Rainbow Bridge-that is for healing after pet loss.I have used it several times,it is wonderful---
  • I feel like my life resembles this old tune some consider to be...
    the perfect country western song.
    "I was drunk the day my mama got out of prison
    And I went to pick her up in the rain
    But before I could get to the station in the pickup truck
    She got ran over by a da*ned old train.
    So I'll hang around as long as you will let me
    And I never minded standin' in the rain
    You don't have to call me darlin' darlin'
    You never even call me....
    Well I wonder why you don't call me...
    Why don't you ever call me by my name."

    "You Never Even Called Me by My Name" is the title of a song written by Steve Goodman and John Prine, produced by Ron Bledsoe, and recorded by country music singer David Allan Coe. It was the third single release of his career, included on his album Once Upon a Rhyme. The song was Coe's first Top Ten hit, reaching a peak of #8 on the Billboard country singles charts.( I got the first batch of info from an obviously incorrect source, the above info is wikipedia based and hopefully correct! )

    I see the shrink on Thursday and I know we wanted to try the new med, so I tried to start tapering off my Lamictal...Yeah, don't think I can do it.
    You see while it does not help my depression/bi-polar typeII symptoms, it kicks the Cr*P out of my pain! drop the dose from 75mg and the pain in my back just charges back in like gangbusters in about 2 days! So, I am depressed in the middle of spring with everything green, but things don't hurt so bad. Trouble is, I'm depressed.
    I know all the "right" things to do, problem is getting them done.

    Well, just got to hope my shrink can work up some magic potion. Probably time for little talk therapy and cognitive work, again, sigh...
  • wrambler >:D< I am SO sorry you have lost chewy :(

    I hurt even thinking about life without our mojo ( dog ), so I can image how you feel with your loss. Please keep talking and seeking ways to heal.

    I hear you about Easter time - OMG! Yeah I would be like skip that weekend in my life calendar after all you have been through. OR try to turn that weekend around into something good ;)

    By the way I too can relate to that song lol
    L1 - S2 "gone" useless in 1 way or another. DDD. RA. Bone Spurs. Tons of nerve damage/issues. Stenosis. Both knees replaced. 50 yrs old. I had a great fall (hence my user name) at age 41 and it has been a domino effect every since.
  • I'm so very sorry to hear you lost your best pal, Chewy. I know you were dreading this day, understandably, and my heart feels heavy for you and your family.Chewy was such a special member of your family, you have every right to feel as low as you do now, but remember Chewy would want you to smile often when you think of him and his antics. I felt like I'd met him from your avatar, he was a beautiful dog! Take care of yourself!

  • Edited by Z06. SPAM content against forum rules.
  • Wrambler he's got some nerve! Why he chose your post we'll probably never know. I'll take 2 eggs, toast and spam. TC. CHarry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • Chose lots of posts.
    ARG...I Pm'd Z06 as he is online now, or at least his circle is green!
  • If anyone finds anymore of that SPAM for pills stuff let me know and I'll go fix it. That spammer types quick...
  • :D :D :D :D :D

    Feel for you that you're having a rough patch right now. I have a very healthy respect for the best of Satan's weapons, depression. My grandmother and mother had anxiety and depression issues and I've had to deal with it my entire adult life. Hang in there! The doc will get you on the right medication. It takes a bit of trail and error.

    Had to laugh when you quoted the David Allen Coe song -- I went to College at LSU in the early to mid 70s and saw David many times in a small venue called the Kingfish in Baton Rouge. Standing right up close and personal to him as he sang that song.

    The good ole days! carefree and footloose AND back limber! (LOL!)

    Take care,

  • Just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and how you are doing. I hope you find some relief with different meds. Talking is always good too, whether its to your therapist, or us at SH.

    It stinks being depressed when spring comes. I always count on it to bring me "up". However, this year, not so much. I won't bore you with my "woes", unless you need to get to sleep! HaHa.

    Sometimes it just feels a tiny bit better to know there others out there who can relate to what you are going through, and even though we don't "know" each other, we do in a sense, and care for our fellow spineys. Here's hoping you feel better soon.

    Take care,
  • Hi Wrambler...I'm sorry I didn't see your post about you pup. I know how tough it is to lose a 4-legged family member.

    Anyhow, I hope you are doing ok.
  • Getting used to it. The realization he won't be there to trip over comes a little quicker and hurts a bit less, day be day.

    His ashes are at the Vets, and we have been so busy we have not been able to pick them up. Not sure I want to deal with that, I know my wife doesn't either.

    I hope I can get them/him back in the next day or so.

    They were 12 very good years, just 2.5 months short of 12 years. He was a good boy right to the end.

    My youngest son is unhappy with us. We told him that the next dog would be more akin to a lap dog. Chewy was an Oorang Airedale, they bred them larger in the U.S. than the European version. he could lay his head down on the dining room table, yes, DOWN.
    Weigh between 104 and 110lbs up till the last few months, then dropped to 100lb and we knew it was all muscle loss.

    Anyway, we will get another, unless we stumble across the "right" pound puppy we will try for a European Airedale. Although the sight of Chewy standing guard was impressive. He loved to "talk" to people to greet them. Problem was that unless they knew him, it just sounded like growling and scared them! He would lower his head, growl and wag his tail.

    Where ever he is now, I hope he waits for me and is there to greet me on the other side.
  • So I don't get things to confused.
    I just picked up his ashes.
    There is a verse with his ashes I have never heard I posted it here. I think I put He is home for the subject line.

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