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Coping with Family

TraseeTTrasee Posts: 571
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:47 AM in Depression and Coping
Hey fellow Spineys,

As much as I have been on and off the forums in the last year, I have never posted here much. I have only dealt with post surgical depression myself. But my sister has been diagnosed with bipolar and borderline personality disorder. For about 25 years she has suffered depression that seemed to come and go. Right now she is worse than I have ever known. Getting adjusted to the proper medications takes so long. This has been so traumatic for our family.

She currently lives with me and the stress of this disease is pushing MY pain levels through the roof. I try to be understanding but the constant need for drama is just wearing me down. I wondered if any fellow posters have dealt with this, coupled with our own recoveries or chronic pain? She is currently in therapy on an out patient basis. This seems to be as slow a process as fusion recovery.

I hope everyone is well and as pain free as possible :)

Thanks and Hugs,


  • I don't want to worry you..but it has been my experience that bipolar disease will affect your sisters family lives forever..in some way.
    My mother was diagnosed when I was 13..she has caused fights in the family...lost her home..blew money..bounced checks..stopped taking her meds a million times..lived with all of us at some point.

    I am sorry you are having to deal with this on top of everything else. I don't have any easy answers for you..When my moms meds are working well she is stable..but she has her manic phases and depression phases..I know her like a book after so many years..I know just by talking to her on the phone what phase she is in.

    My mom now lives in an assisted living apartment. I love her but it has been very hard over the years.
  • Tonya,

    I feel for you! Your mom sounds exactly like my sister. She is a mess financially. I am supporting both of us right now. And the fights are doozies. I had to tell her last night, I can no longer live this way. She either becomes an active participant in controlling her disease or I am leaving. I am not trying to be cruel, but my sanity and recovery are suffering at this point. And undortunately there is no other family willing to help anymore.

    I appreciate your response! Just seeing someone else's experiences helps.

  • Traci,

    I haven't had to help a family member with Bipolar or any similar disease. I just wanted to give you major Kudos for your helping her. You just have to make sure you don't compromise *your* health in the process. Support proud *HUGZ* woman!!!

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • It may be true someone with bipolar doesn't seem to have control over themselves with intensely loving some movie more than any they've ever seen, over and over again. I am not bipolar but have serious issues with depression and being all or nothing, paranoid, dramatic, and overwhelming to those around me. It is soemthing I am trying to accept and learn to live with, mostly the fact that when it comes to these overwhelming emotions the trend continues in a very predictable way. However, I don't have a low self-esteem like before, I don't have self-destructive addictions, I haven't been gambling or blacked out drunk in years. I have changed. Someone I know has been struggling with bipolar his whole life. Today he is a family man who has torubles but does the best he can, he no longer drinks and self-destructs. I am just wanting to give you some hope, even though the burden might not change, the person can. You did the right thing in demanding your sister be responsible for her actions, this is healthier for her than letting her stay dependent. This doesn't mean you don't help it means you help her help herself. whew!
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