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Words to live by...

NumbskullNNumbskull Posts: 1,526
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:48 AM in Matters of the Heart
Somebody had this posted on their profile on facebook, and I just had to share it myself:

There comes a time in life when you have to walk away from all the pointless drama and negativity, and surround yourself with people who make you laugh so hard that you forget the bad and focus on the good. Life is too short to be anything but happy.

Being a chronic pain patient, I think this is such an important mantra to live by. Every once in a while, I have to take a close look at myself and my life, and weed out the negativity, as it just contributes to the pain.

Anyways, just thought I'd share. Life is too short to focus on, or be negative. Enjoy what you have, as others may not have it. If someone is being negative towards you, just smile, and say "Have a nice day!" Who knows, it just might spread!
APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own


  • Thanks for sharing this Kelly.

    There is so much truth to this!

    Sometimes it is difficult to rearrange our thoughts into laughter, but I always give it my besst shot!

  • My all time favorite when someone is trying to get under your skin say Thank you with a smile and walk away. Those are the days you are the most in control.
  • Kelly,
    I sometimes in closing suggest people be kind to themselves, as we are the bigger critics of all the things we can not longer do, positive thoughts do pre-empt positive action and even if we delude ourselves into the notion that we can do these things we once did, even for a fleeting moment we have broken that cycle of negativity.

    I do have times when I actively do not mention the P word and give myself time off from being me, Sternbach R, the PM academic said, “that it takes equal effort to be negative so why not be positive” once we start any sentence with yes but, I would but, we have already set the foundations of momentum towards not doing what we should be, laughing and seeing fun things is infectious, they are all around we just have to look more diligently to see them.

    We all live between that truth of what we would like to be doing and our painful reality, perhaps a laugh a day will keep the doctor away, who knows. I am a positive person and worked hard to share this illusion, however positive we are, living in constant pain is not easy, we are the determinants of our own game face, and it is a gift to ourselves. In keeping it real we know our limitations and aim to live within them.

    As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”

    Take care and be kind to yourself.

  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    John, you are so right. I try to never say I can't. Also, laughter is the best medicine as they say. I know that I don't laugh nearly enough but I do try. My brother got a silly message on his phone the other day and he and I laughed until we cried! I told him I need that to listen to everyday! It was so silly really...it said this is your cat when he sees you naked and the cat laughed and jibbered something and for some reason it was hilarious! Our son's thought it was lame of course but hey, it worked for us.
    Hope you can have a good laugh today.
    Hope we can all have a good laugh today.

  • I try to use 'positive affirmations' mainly for my own self growth especially since negativity can bring you down and one thing about being in a negative situation when you get out of it you're overjoyed! And there's nowhere to go but up. Onward and upwards friends. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • thanks for the reminder! it is easy to get bogged down in the negative! life is made for love and happiness!!what a wonderful thought and way to live!! L, Jenny :)
  • A marvelous sentiment.
    How do I reduce my reaction to "pain". Well, for me, using the word, only gives it repeated focus in my life. I much prefer to call it 'discomfort'. I am not completely comfortable with naming it, as I have found that it can allow myself to fixate on just what is wrong with myself, and forget to enjoy all those things that are right with myself.

    As youngsters - we all heard the word no - about 60,000 times, depending on the Psyc study you read up on.

    With these issues with my spine, over 3 decades, how many times could I have used or heard the word, "pain", or had my internal speak, set me up for "hearing" it or using it, in despair. The sub-conscious mind is set to hear and believe anything it keeps hearing repeatedly. So, with a simple thing like the word "no" and the effect it has on our development, why not change our outcomes, by using the same Psychology, relating it to pain - or discomfort.

    In the end - I am in charge of "programming my computer." If I keep that in mind, it really is a long term strategy. There comes a day, when you figure out, "look - I have not noticed "discomfort" as a primary thing, for awhile." And awhile -is something that you cannot even quantify. I just know that I am feeling well, and not really tied up in my spine.

    What I find that comes to the surface - is a quality called "GRATEFUL ACCEPTANCE". I have time to focus and enjoy all of those things that provide a lifting to my attitude and character.

    Negative people, are not considered, I just move away from them, I am not going to fight, just move, as Tzun Zu, when pushed, I pull and step aside.
  • Centurion45,
    However positive we could be, we have to be realistic in the achievements that are possible, aspiration is a motivator only if those ideas are attainable, even if positive attributes do not provide the expected improvements they as Centurion said, have filled that void where negativity can originate, we were in encouraged in PM to rationalise every pain thought before accepting it as our truth and not letting those small beginnings create inertia for more negative conformation and momentum.

    Even positive has to be reachable otherwise we create repetitive disappointment, not intentionally more inadvertently through our ambition and tenacity. I only acknowledge elements of acceptability that enable me to move forward, the totality of acceptance is not necessary. I do what I need to get the job done, that idea that we are the originators of our future is realistic if we focus on those aspects that we can change and manage more effectively that which we cannot, and this takes experience, time to learn.

    I too congregate towards positive people and flourish through that osmosis of progression, I have become less tolerant of those who cannot help my plight and selective in my associations. We all have negative and indecisive moments, negative as a strategy will have a shelf-life and only a progressive phase on this journey.

    Take care.

  • I found Shinzen, about 5 years ago. For a year, I wondered how to incorporate his idea of equanimity. In the face of pressure, to stay the course, to reduce suffering and reaction to zero, so pain is just there, but not a focus. For a time, I felt it was a completely unattainable plateau. Then as I kept working away, I felt that I did reach a plateau, and came upon a bright vista, shortly after. Completely unexpected, but in a lot of ways, the answer to my searching. Now - I realize the plateaus and vista's are part of my journey.

    I was asked what my expectations were, for pain control. I bluntly answered, that I expected to be in control of pain, until the day after I died. It's been more than 2 decades since that question was asked of me. I know I did not have the wisdom, at the time, but my have been open to divine direction.
  • Kelly, great post, I really like it, think I gonna make it on a paper and put on fridge, so true,
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