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Shoot Me Now, Please!!

lisa burekllisa burek Posts: 855
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:48 AM in Depression and Coping
When it rains it pours...
Today I was supposed to have my 2nd opinion appointment for my c-spine. I say "was" because I had to cancel it this morning.

I had some muscle ache in left hip/butt last night, nothing too horrible. Well, this morning while taking my meds I had a coughing fit due to this miserable head cold and totally spazzed out my back big time. Of course this was within 5 minutes of needing to leave for the bus, and my kids had to witness me yelling/crying in pain and barely able to move. Why did they have to see that??

Its pretty ironic to cancel a spine appointment because you threw out your back. Oh well......I feel better typing it out.

Have a good day spineys,



  • So sorry to hear this, that sucks...

    AS for shooting you, NO, wait your turn, I think their were others in line 1st.... :O

    Hope you get it unspazzed soon. Gee Firefox does not consider that to be a word. It considers unspeakably a word, will that do?
  • OK, I'll try to be patient and wait my turn!

    If "ginormous" (hate that word) can make it in the dictionary why can't "unspazzed"? LOL
  • Trying to do "old" things again. I have a shed that the base is rotted out of and I was trying to level it out. Lots of cramps and screaming muscles to follow.

    I managed to get it better than it was, but it was kind of sad to have to sit on the ground to dig. Not being able to bend over enough standing to get it done.

    One son is moved out and the other is 18 and totally wrapped up within is Lacrosse and senior year of highschool. He is being courted by half a dozen colleges along the east coast due to his high GPA =D> and Lacrosse skills. Add those two together and the coaches all want those stats. They want good players and a GPA that makes their programs all nice and shiny. I want him to be happy, but I also want him to keep the goal of a useful degree at the end of his schooling in mind.

    Anyway, that left me sitting on the ground digging by myself.

    It took several hours for things to calm down once I surrendered and quit for the day.

    I don't know what is worse, the pain, the cramps, or their "afterlife".

    Working along the edge of the woods, 4 wheelers buzzing around my neighbors property while he screamed directions at a child much to young to be on one. The dove that landing 4 feet away from me while I was taking a sit break. Sunshine, nature and misery all wrapped up into very strange bedfellows.

    I have a month before I see my shrink. I hope I can stay on track long enough to make it till then.
    He is very, very busy and trying to see him sooner would be problematic at best.

    Again, I hope your back calms down, and really understand how it feels to miss that appt.
  • you had a major pain flare-up and had to cancel your c-spine appt.

    I hope your back pain eases off and that you don't stress yourself about having to cancel your appt.

    Keeping you in my heart-thoughts and wanted to encourage your to trust when these things happen beyond your control, this is my heart-surrender when it happens to me..."that somehow you will see it all fits together anyway perfectly" :)

    Seriously, I hope you can trust the process of how this unfolds for you, I know the surrender isn't easy, and when I stopped beating myself up for what I couldn't change, it was amazing I actually did see the change served me well. I know you have your back pain flaring, and you doing tlc for you brings you to a valley of peace and rest, and eventually to the mountain view with a renewed sense of how things can unfold for you.

    Pray that is so for you....and so hope you can talk to your children about the chronic pain and how you are finding ways to find things to help you with your pain. Bring them into the conversation and ask them to share with you what they experienced and felt when they saw you in so much pain...big growth step and way to nurture them and put them at peace about an uncontrollable painful moment.

    I remember my Mom would deny her pain when I was a child, and try to deny it was bothering her, it made me feel very insecure, if she just would have talked about it and connected with how I felt thru it and made that secure connection with me, neither of us would of been in denying pain.

    Hope this helps...everything truly unfolded the best it could for you, but what you do with it is where it can be empowering for you, for you taking care of you, for your children to share with you of your spine problems, win-win situation.

    Also hope this finds you resting well and the pain easing up and you feeling restored. Gentle (((hugs))) to you.


  • Lisa,

    So sorry you threw your back out, especially in front of your kids. Don't worry too much about them--kids are resilient.

    I take it you were going to drive yourself to your appointment and there was nobody else to take you? I hope you can get it rescheduled without having to wait a long time.

    I hope you're feeling better this evening. :)

    2009 Foraminotomy C6-72010 PLIF L4-S1Multi RFA's, cervical inj, lumbar injLaminectomy L3-4 and fusion w/internal fixation T10-L4 July 17Fusion C2-C5 yet to be scheduled
  • for your kind words of support. Thankfully my Mom took my girls to her house for a sleepover, since they don't have school thurs. and fri. Praise "Mimi"!! She's the best.

    Thankfully the aches have calmed down to the point that I can move without screaming, yeah!

    Wrambler, how are you today? I hope you are feeling better.

  • I don't think I am suffering from anything that spring won't correct...are we there yet?

    I feel the same stupid way, but do not want to mess up your thread with my problems.

    How are you doing? Did you get rescheduled?
    I hope better for the 1st and yes for the second.
    Soon I guess goes without saying!
  • You can always "mess up my posts" with what you are going through. Yes, spring. The only problem with spring is that we have to get through the winter, ugh. I may not be bi-polar, but I am "uni-polar" (LOL) on the depression side. Feel free any time to PM me when you are low, sometimes just typing it out and having another spiney say "I hear ya" helps.

    Thankfully back is feeling a bit better and am waiting for a call back from the spine Dr.

    Take care,

  • Here's today's story....

    My Valium script is due. I call the Pharmacy as I want to check to make sure they got a refill ready. At this point I am 100% sure I put it on the auto refill. NO, seems I did not do that and it runs out today. I have the girl fax a refill request to my doctor and tell her I will call them also.

    As I hang up the phone this cloud of befuddlement lifts. I remember the doctor handing me the paper script as Valium can not be done electronically. :O Then as I sit here feeling stupid, I remember that I placed that script in the glovebox of the Jeep... L)

    So, I just left work, went up to the pharmacy and personally handed the girl my script and apologized for adding extra work to their already crazy Friday.

  • I just mentally blacked out with my prescriptions too. Thought I called for a refill and didn't, of course one pill left.....It would be so much easier if they all were due for refills at the same time!

    The good news is that at least you got your meds. It drives me crazy: My prescription plan won't refill until a certain date, which I can understand. However, trying to consolidate trips to the pharmacy is my goal, not to "score" my meds early. Oh well, hang in there.

  • I have 5 including toothpaste...
    Every time I get the refills close to one or two days we change something and they all get scattered again!
  • Glad to hear you've unspazzed a bit, lol. You don't need to tell me about coughing fits and hurting yourself, that's how I actually herniated a disc in my neck!! Had severe bronchitis turned to walking pneumonia, and one bad coughing fit did me in, I can tell you the exact moment, and that was over a year and a half ago... Hope you continue to feel better, and get your appointment soon! You as well Wrambler, and we all have those moments, not to worry!!
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • What might help is if your pharmacy offers this... Mine is Walgreen's and I've set my prescription profile to remind me a week out that my prescription is needing to be refilled via e-mail.

    Another trick I've used before this option became available is when I refill, I take 5 of the pills and put them in the previous bottle. When I see I am down to 1 or 2, I call - then put the 5 pills back in the bottle. :)

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,730
    I'm so sorry to hear about your bad luck. Don't worry about the kids. THEY are probably worried sick over you!
    Good luck, Jim
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
  • what would I do without my spiney family?!

    Brenda: good suggestion on the meds refill. I'm going to try it.

    Thanks smiley for your well wishes.

    Jim: been thinking of you dealing with your Mom's illness, sending good vibes your way.

    Take care all,

  • Hope it works as well for you as it did me Lisa!! :)

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
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