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It's really me! Need support right now. Will explain......

eajosepheeajoseph Posts: 315
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:49 AM in Depression and Coping
Hi to everyone on s-h

I saw that some of my buddies from long ago are still around (were online when I signed in again). I'm sorry for being gone for so long. Know that I have thought of you guys a lot but never seemed to have the strength to get online. That means little time to read or reply to email, forget about MySpace or Facebook, my online time was to pay bills and research WTF is wrong with me.

Things have gotten worse lately. I've thought about going to the ER at least 4 times since Sunday but have struggled to get through each day and pray that tomorrow will be even a little better. A song just flashed through my head "Will tomorrow ever come?" Garth Brooks????

I'm desperately searching for doctors that will think I'm worth their effort to help me. The RX witch at PM told me at an appt that I had to accept the fact that the person I was is dead and gone; mourn the lost and move on. How's that for a smack upside the head. I'm trying to find a new PM doctor; maybe one that would see me at least once a year. The RX nurse is all I've gotten for over a year; the dr is too busy to see a patient. And she has the personality of the wicked witch's evil step-mother. I'm not being dramatic.

I don't have a neurosurgeon any more. He disliked my honest assessment of him and called me uneducated and irresponsible. whatever I did find a really nice (so far) neurologist. Have done 2 sleep studies and will see where this goes later this week. She recommended a RA dr; I got an appt for Feb. I pray daily, usually several times a day, that somebody will help me. Soon would be great but doesn't seem realistic.

For those of you that read this and don't know me from the past, I'm not usually this down and unable to see any light. PMS doesn't help either. For any of my old buddies from before, I promise not to take such a long vacation again. I'm glad you guys are still to be found. I hope you will be the ones with great stories of how you've gotten better.

Be Back Tomorrow! I promise.............


  • Hi Beth;

    It's funny, I was thinking of you today, as I was looking back into the older threads. You probably won't remember me, my on-line name used to be smiley735.

    I don't have much to say, except try to hang in there, and I know that you're using every possible tool that you have to relieve your pain. If it does get too bad, that it has serious detrimental affects on you, then do go to the ER to get some help. Do you have a pcp that you can call for an appointment, that can help you?

    There is something you said, that does ring true though, about mourning the loss of our former selves. It is a process that all of us have to face at some point, but if they said that in place of treating your pain, well, that's just not right at all.

    Anyways, sort of glad to see you back, obviously not for the reason that you are. I hope you get the pain relief soon that you so badly need. Take care;

    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • I have you as my first buddy from Spine Health here and often checked to see of you've posted. So good to see you here although not so happy you're having pain and not having any answers right now. That's absurd that you haven't seen your PM Dr. and only his difficult nurse in about those words...

    I'm glad you have your Neurologist giving you referrals and testing though. I don't know if it would help if your neurologist could contact your PM Dr. or better if you found another Dr. if your pain isn't controlled?

    Usually at a year you would be requiring a medication review by your PM Dr. so that's absurd if he's not seeing you. I hope your RA Dr. will be able to help you. It's not a easy road to take this one we're on something like the road least wanted to travel I say. I still need to come here almost daily for support so hope to see you more and hope if you end up at ER the ER Doctor gives your PM Dr. a call and asks why you're pain isn't controlled. I pray you get some relief and answers soon. Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts and prayers for you. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • i sure would not be impressed with the way your PM dr does not see you, and you are left with this nurse, who was very tactless in how she spoke to you.

    i would also try fing a new PM dr, one who actually sees you, try talking with your PCP and let him/her no wats happening.

    your neurologist seems good, have a chat to him/her

    good luck
    take care
  • I assume you are taking opioids for your pain. They can wreck your hormone levels making you feel like crap....no energy and depressed. Have your GP check your hormones. It can be treated and you just may get your old energy back, at least a lot of it.
    Just a thought.
    Patsy W
  • Beth I hope you find a new PM doctor and can get some relief soon.
  • Thanks for all your support and encouragement. I did find a new PM facility and fired the old one!!!! I am now going to a facility that does PM, PT, Accupuncture, has a Pain Clinical Psychologoist, and more. It's in Woodlawn, MD (near Baltimore). It's associated with U of MD.

    The PM dr is changing one med at a time to see what will give me better pain control. Sent me to PT, getting ready for aqua-therapy; the PM dr is worried about it a little because taking a shower is absolutely torture for me. Hubby and I call it water torture. :))(

    At least the dr and everyone else I have met seem to have a plan and are willing to work with me and not cause me a ton of pain in the process.

    I'll keep you posted. Thanks again for your support. It means a lot to me. >:D<
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