Im new here and dont want to start off as someone who is just whining..I guess I just feel I have no hope left. Ive been living with this pain for so many years now I have forgotten whats its like to feel pain free and normal. Im not the same person i used to be, I have become so fatigued from medication, depressed and unmotivated. My focus is always on getting through the day and easing the pain i feel.
As if the back and neck pain arent enough along with the migraines and depression, several months ago i started have pain in my left arm that is almost as bothersome as the back and neck...sometimes i can barely lift my left arm up and being left handed that makes things even more difficult.
I just got the wheels in motion for a new doctor. I dont have anything against the doctor i had who did my cervical and spinal fusion surgeries, he was very nice but I dont think he helped me. Out of desperation I asked him the last time i saw him if i could have a total disc replacement like ive been reading about and he said that i am not a candidate for that surgery and to be careful about these radio and tv ads that claim they can fix these type problems because they cannot. I sort of gave up after that.
Pain medication mixed with anitdepressants and sleeping pills because i cant sleep without them have turned me into a walking zombie. I found myself missing several appointments with my doctor because the effort to get there only to leave feeling the same just didnt seem worth it.
Now I am waiting to hear back from this new doctor if he is willing to see me. I feel it may be like a mechanic, in that when they know another mechanic has been under the hood taking things apart and attempting to fix them the dont want anything to do with it. I asked the triage nurse taking my information if that was the case and she said thats why they ask all the questions, so the doctor can decide if he wants to attempt to help...
I feel like if he says no I am destined to live like this forever. Right now that seems impossible.
Thank you all so much for listening to me,