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A man in pain

jj-from montrealjjj-from montreal Posts: 60
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:52 AM in Chronic Pain
From the beginning of time, men were the providers, the warier, and the strong ones. Even in today’s modern times, man has a defined expectations…Am I less of a man, if the above definition no longer applies to me any more..?
I’m sure I can speak on behalf of most men, when I say that if a man looses control, he looses his ability to create, and if he can not create, his entire existence comes in to question.
It took a very long time, and a lot of soul searching to come to terms with my new reality, and maybe a little help from my 6yr old…
My daughter gave me the reality check of a life time on where my palce really is. One day I was in bed. Not wanting to do much of anything, or be around anybody. My daughter, who was always told not to disturb me, came bursting into my bedroom with a smile from ear to ear. Those days I was hibernating from reality. She showed me that she got an A+ on one of her projects that her and I worked on..She told me that had I not helped her she would have failed. To be honest, I can’t remember what my participation was in her project all I know is, I made a difference…
Keep smiling


  • Wow that's great about your daughter and you helping her. Just because you're disabled doesn't mean you don't have input or less of a man. While not a man my Grandmother had MS and slowly went from walking to a wheelchair when I was a teen living with her and she is one of my greatest mentors in life. Thanks for sharing this positive news. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • Good to see you posting, though I'm sorry you've had that soul-searching that many of us have had to do over the years.

    Children - they can make all the difference in the world. You're still daddy to her and she loves you for whatever you can do, however little it may seem to you, it's very big to her.

    Thanks for sharing. No, you're no less of a man, but I understand how one might begin to think that, given a certain set of circumstances. Just keep being a daddy and doing the best you can. You obviously makes your daughter happy, what more really makes a man?

    Take care and I hope you're feeling better.
  • Love this story! It's amazing what a child can teach us adults. I'm glad her success was your success.

    I wish you more good moments like this!
  • came to be like this. Before you did not know of the Pain and suffering you could bear, you did not realize just how important your family is. Being a man is not providing and procreating. It is being there for your family with your love and emotional support.

    Your daughter realizes this, soon you will too.

    So says the 29 year old who no longer has a uterus or the ability to have children, cook or clean most days.
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