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Pain going into the incision, less ROM and where did my laughter go?

zigazziga Posts: 143
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:56 AM in Neck Pain: Cervical

I just wish I could handle this better. I am 8 month post op and I progress and then back again.

I have pain going into my incision, going into my chest. It feels as if I had a cut inside. I wonder if is the muscle they have to cut to go in?

I am doing Tai Chi, walking and started physical therapy again. The pain also goes up to my left ear and arm. It feels sore. I wander if I did something wrong. My surgeon told me I could do anything I want. I don't do everything I want because pain stops me.

Yesterday a friend hug me and I scream. It feels like a cut inside. I told my physiatrist and she recommended me to see another one.

Even speaking or doing any kind of face is painful in my neck. Laughing is very strange I don't feel able to laugh as before, I use to laugh a lot, I wander if the change of motion change this. Has anyone has experience change in the way you laugh or cry?

I want to do anything that is in my power to feel better. I get depress but now I am fighting back. Before I felt so angry at having surgery, because I notice I felt better before that all my focus was on regret and nostalgia. Seeing my friends cleaning and moving around like flash gordon amazes me. I took so much things for granted! Now I can see how people move around like working ants.

I want to go back to work. Has anybody experience what I have and has get better and have go back to work.

Hope all of you sleep well! Hope your feel better! Enjoy anything that you love!


I have move on thanks to many of you people.


  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,862
    I apologize in advance not know the date of your surgery. And also the type of surgery that was performed and to what discs?

    All those come into play when laying out the next step.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • My surgery was ACDF C5C6 it was performed on january 26, 2011. I feel a lump in my throat that comes and goes. A lot of pupping in my neck and the feeling of feeling that I can not rest my head, I feel like if the bone graft is bigger that what it should be.

    I feel so strange and so alien because I haven't heard anybody complain on change of laughter or change in personality. I was so use to to move in certain ways when I talked, and now I just feel I keep quiet because I can not express as before. sometimes I started talking and start moving as I am use to and then it hits me I just can, and this disorients me.

    I wish I could adapt to this as many of you have done it. Man have more fusions than me and I don't hear them complain in change of loosing spontaneity when talking. I have a friend that has all his neck fuse, he has a cage and if you could see him... he moves very graciously with his limitation.

    But then I get so mess up in pain and coordination with this fusion. Moving my shoulders up hurts, turning my head, trying chin tuck... bending gives pressure in my head, hugging is painful, smelling stuff, cleaning.

    I want to clean! I want to help!

    To cook and wash the dishes has been like a big deal!

    I turn here because I feel my surgeon haven't been clear with what can I lift, the physiatrist is better with this but I feel I need more structure, she doesn't say, you can lift so many pounds and then this many... She is very clear in telling me to do the exercise as long as the pain permits, not to exceed. Then my surgeon tells me do the things even if you have pain.

    I will go with doing tai chi, I have discovered this helps me and walking.

    But sometimes I just want a pillow between my vertebrates.

    Sorry for my English not a native speaker.

  • Hi Dilauro,

    I know you have a lot of people to answer to. I was wandering if you know of people that have injured their surgery and then gotten better.

    I was able to move my head back with little disconfort, but know is very painful, it feels as if I have a cut inside. Is a localized pain that comes with certain movements.

    Have you heard of people that recover from this.

    I am sometimes very negative. I got very mad with the outcomes of surgery because I feel worst. My phisiatrist, sent me to another phisiathrist. I guess I will need an MRI to see what is happening.

    I am no more willing and determined to get better. I am just hoping that this will help.

    I read about an article here of alternative therapy it has to do with gates. This was very interesting. I used to have network spinal analysis (NSA) an it used to help a lot... but as I submerged in the world of looking for help I got mixed up with different treatments and with fear so this brought up a lot of anxiety depression and more pain. This lead me running into the surgeon.

    I don't know if this kind of therapy would work now. I wish it would. But guessing on its explanation I wonder how confused is my body with external stimulus. Because the gate hypothesis is that we have different fibers that transport different sensations, one for example pain. But if we for example provoke a different stimulus like a tender massage, or the feeling of another sensation which we know will not harm us this could inhibit the pain message to the brain. Because the pain may travel more slowly than the other stimulus.

    I use to love the sea and affection of others, the messages, and music... but as I associated the sea with a place that I don't longer enjoy as before this stimulus becomes painful, music also puts me nostalgic because I want to move my neck to its rhythm. I love to play with dogs and before surgery I did not touch them a lot because of fear, but a remember cuddling with a kitten. Now to do this is very painful. This is why I now see how fear can make us ultra prevent from things we love. I avoided a lot of things I could still do before surgery and now I noticed that they are extremely painful and overwhelming. For example I could clean the bathroom or do laundry nowwwww WOW is a mission.

    My brain then decided to punish me, for example I got sad when I saw a dog or listen to music because it reminded me of my fear and because it is no longer pleasant.

    But every day I try to be more optimistic thanks to some of the community advices. Today I decided to start reconfiguring my thoughts and to redefine those stimulus. I want to listen to music again and be thankful for all the dancing and all the good moments it gave me. I will enjoy it as I can. The sea, I will be amaze by it again and again. As I took neurontin my skin sensations change and I stop going into the sea. I regret this because I could still enjoy it without pain, I did not have so much pain before surgery, and no pain at all in the neck. So i was waiting for surgery to enjoy the sea again and dance in it. It was a meditation that I took away from me cause of fear.

    I mourn all this losses, all the enjoyment movement grant me at sea, taking waves and hugs, playing with my nephews, I wanted so much to play with them as before. I am a kid inside, I was a teacher and had to use a lot of body language to teach.

    But today I start again wanting to get better, thanking the ocean, music, friends, patience of others, all the friends that could not stand me, the subways, the trees, the mistakes, the stars, the rivers... I forgive me for trying to much to understand what was happening, for entering into a surgery in such a vulnerable state and grant me the possibility of getting better.

    I will be better, and hope all of us will be. I will be better. I will stand every day and do the best I can.

    I will open gates of pleasure to block those gaits of pain. Wow I am in so much pain now that it is so amazing for me to remember being in an office of a neurologist thinking I had it bad, now I can feel the bad, but that is the past attacking my will and now I will concentrate in getting better.

    So do you know if someone have rehurt and gotten better, I hope so. At least I am going to be one of them. Just wandering if you know if its all about time.

    Thanks to anyone that reads this extra long message and thanks in advance if you answer. thanks

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