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Words of Wisdom

NumbskullNNumbskull Posts: 1,526
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:58 AM in Matters of the Heart
Do You Believe?

So I subscribe to a site that sends daily positive thoughts of wisdom, and this was today's, that I just thought I'd share.

“The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to reflect their inner beliefs.” –James Allen

Do you believe you can do work you love? If you don’t believe it, you likely won’t try for it.

Do you believe you can be in a happy relationship? If you don’t believe, you likely won’t open up to it.

Do you believe you can adopt that healthier habit? If you don’t believe it, you likely won’t stick to it.

Do you believe you can fully release your anger toward that person who hurt you? If you don’t believe it, you likely won’t let go of it.

Do you believe you should be treated with respect? If you don’t believe it, you likely won’t require it.

Do you believe this moment is good enough? If you don’t believe it, you likely won’t enjoy it.

Do you believe you deserve happiness? If you don’t believe it, you likely won’t let yourself feel it.

It’s not true that anything is possible—I can say with absolute certainty that none of us will grow wings tonight and fly out our bedroom windows. But it is true that far more is possible than we often realize.

It starts with what we believe. And beliefs are thoughts that aren’t fact—meaning we can change them if we really want to.
We can change the stories we tell ourselves. We can change the limits we’ve set for ourselves. Most importantly, we can change what we do for ourselves, starting right this moment. Every passing second is a new opportunity to be who we want to be, if we believe we can.

I may not always have believed the best about and for myself, but in this moment, I choose to believe and act on it. Do you?

While I don't believe that if we believe that one day we'll be completely pain free, we will be, I do believe we will have moments or days of lesser pain if we keep that train of positive thought. I also believe that we should live for those days and not take them for granted, or those around us. And I do believe that all the statements above are so true, respect in ourselves - and others, anger, living as healthy a life as possible, our happiness. What do you believe?
APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own


  • ... in Santa Claus.

    Does that help? image:)" alt=">:)" height="20" />
  • I firmly believe in positive thinking, and it can benefit pain. At least in that case pain doesn't stress us so much - we know how stress can worsen it - and over the years I've learned to try to see the positive in every negative situation. How many of you know that the Chinese character for "crisis" is also the one for "opportunity"? Don't get me wrong, like everyone else I'm down at times, but I try not to let it last too long. Counting my blessings helps, as does "turning lemons into lemonade".

    At the first 12th Step meeting I went to 23 1/2 years ago, I was given a hefty "dose" of tough love, the person saying to me, "If you keep that ("that" meaning self-pity) up, it's going to be "poor me, pour me a drink". Did I snap out of that state lickety-split! I hope to never forget what that man said, which put me on the road to positive thinking.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,875
    I do believe.

    I know that if I didn't and forgot about having a positive attitude, I wouldn't be ere today in the capacity that I am

    It is because I do believe and I always try to maintain a positive outlook that I can move ahead.

    What I have always found interesting, is what it takes or what motivates us to believe and to move ahead.

    For me, its two things:
    1- Seeing so many others in far worse conditions
    2- Being here and trying to get others to get that positive approach
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • So I changed the Main Title as some may have noticed, as I received a new e-mail the other day that I thought I'd share... Funny how sometimes things like this pop up in our lives when we really need to hear them, as I have certain things going on in mine that this certainly applies to, but I also think that it absolutely applies to our journies in our lives in dealing with chronic pain and all that it can bring with it as well.

    “If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.” - Ajahn Chah

    It’s hard to feel peaceful if you dwell on why you should be angry. If you want to feel free, let the story go.

    It’s hard to feel good if you feel like you deserve to feel to feel bad. If you want to feel happy, let your self-judgment go.

    It’s hard to feel satisfied if you feel like everything needs to be perfect. If you want to feel content, let your perfectionism go.

    It’s hard to feel balanced if you like you need to be busy. If you want to feel centered, let the pressure go.

    It’s hard to feel relaxed if you’re clinging to fear or anxiety. If you want to feel at ease, let your worries go.

    It’s hard to feel loved if you mistrust everyone else. If you want to feel connected, let your suspicions go.

    It’s human nature to cling to things that don’t serve us from time to time. But every moment is a new opportunity to let go and be free. Take a deep breath and let go.

    People are always asking how we "accept" our new lives and forget our old ones, how we move on. Most of it is simply letting go. It's not an easy task, much easier said than done. But once you're able to, the freedom from that burden is phenomenal.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • Howdy. I took some days off here to try diferent things to seriously get my mind off the pain because this aint easy, Had a good day or 2 so was almost feeling normal untill nerve flared up again, i almost started to enjoy myself finding some energy to do stuff,

    Went to the shooting range, got some stuff done around house which as no big deal for thats mostly what i do between pain,

    So what i believe is= nerve will always hurt , and thats a fact jack!

    I have done some serious soul searching to come to terms with having to learn to live in pain for life, Problem is i am not liking it no mater how much you want to come to terms with it, Soon as nerve pain lets up even for a short while i get such a boost of energy to live life and do somerhing exiting but it never lasts long enough,

    Ok dont ask me why i posted this here posibly being way off the original subject,

    But just to bring to you guys attention i got another inbox email here in sh from a person name Timex, Prety much same kind of email as before from fused78'

    I tried to send a responce to tell the person i realy am not interested in any private conversations mods had but it did not let me respond,

    I am not realy sure what this need is from who ever is sending it to me and probably others, So who ever you are if you reading this grow up and please get a life because most of us have our own personal issues in life and realy dont care about what you are sending us,

    It realy is so silly as if this was some sort of reality tv show or something,

    Timex or who ever you are please save the drama for your momma, I would have to guess its someone that for some reason has it out for the mods, And life is realy very simple in my view, If you dont like something and you are in no more need for suport its simply time to move on and find something more constructive to do,

    I would not want my private conversations shared posibly with others in some cases so not sure why you feel the need to invade someone elses privacy, Its become obvious that this timex has become obsessed with everything around spine health and cant let go and thinks everyone else is interested,

    Life goes on no mater what hapenes and draging a dead horse aint going to bring it back to life so just let it die who ever you are,

    Flexicore ADR 2004 resulting nerve damage l4l5 Fusion 2006 same level, 2009 hardware removal with lami !
    2012 scs implant ,
  • All the Fun You Missed

    Another excerpt from today's e-mail...

    “Don’t let the past hold you back; you’re missing the good stuff.” -Unknown

    There have been times when I’ve regretted that I missed out on so much when I was younger.

    Because I held onto pain so tightly, I missed out on countless opportunities for fun while sitting alone and feeling bad for myself.

    Because I felt so insecure for so long, I missed out on the chance to make strong friendships while shutting down and assuming people would hurt me.

    And because I was afraid of failing, I missed out on all kinds of professional opportunities while doing what felt easy and safe.

    Now, in my early 30s, it’s tempting to look back and feel bad for squandering those years when I was so full of potential. Then I remember: I still am.

    The other night, I attended a family function with many of the amazing, interesting people who I didn’t fully appreciate when I was caught up in my personal dramas. I planned to leave early because I was somewhat tired, but I ended up dancing until the last song with my big fat Italian family.

    I remember looking around at my cousins, ranging in age from 11 to 35, my aunt in her 50s, and friends of all ages in between, and recognizing that we were all the same on the dance floor.

    We were all losing ourselves in the music, likely thinking about nothing, simply choosing to be together and move. It was almost as if in that moment, we were ageless. What had come or what was coming didn’t matter right then.

    All that mattered was that we all had the same choice to make: sit it out, or dance (yes, like in the song).

    That’s the choice we’re faced with every day.

    We can focus on the fun things we could have done but didn’t, or we can do something fun right now.

    We can dwell on the mistakes we made in past relationships, or we can focus on enjoying the relationships we’re in right now.

    We can think about all the opportunities we missed out on, or we can focus on embracing possibilities right now.

    There will always be something we didn’t do yesterday, but we get to choose right now how yesterday looks when we get to tomorrow. Right now, whatever age we are, this is our chance to live.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • A couple of more from today...

    “Sometimes questions are more important than answers.” -Nancy Willard

    A friend of mine once told me she frequently asked herself, “When is the other shoe going to drop?”

    Whenever things were going well for her, she braced herself for an impending fall so that it wouldn’t be too devastating when things changed, as they often do.

    Despite her intentions, this didn’t protect her from pain; it just kept her from fully enjoying what might have been some of the most fulfilling experiences of her life.

    I realized then that I was also living my life around fearful, defeatist questions.

    What if I never find love? What if I don’t have what it takes? What if I messed up my one big chance?

    They always danced around fears of uncertainty and inadequacy—and because they frequently dominated my thoughts, I consistently acted from a tense, frightened place. These questions felt like self-preservation, when really they were emotional self-mutilation.

    And they repeatedly instigated a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you frequently look for answers to questions about worst case scenarios, you tend to find them, real or imagined.

    It reminds of this time I read about a woman who feared for years that she had cancer, even though she had no symptoms and doctors saw no medical proof to corroborate her suspicions. Many years later, when she received a cancer diagnosis, she said she almost felt relief because she finally knew she was right.

    She attached to her panic over the potential for sickness, and in doing so began suffering long before there was a physical cause.

    We can’t change that some things might not last, and things might happen that we wouldn’t have chosen. But the reality is there are just as many positive possibilities as there are negative ones.

    We get to choose where we focus our energy—whether we dwell on everything that might go wrong, or imagine everything that could go right. What we think dictates what we’ll do, and that plays a big role in what we create.

    It all starts with asking ourselves the right questions. What are those? I don’t know—I don’t have all the answers. But I can tell you mine:

    What if I let myself enjoy this moment? How can I appreciate myself and other people in action today? What’s good around me, and how can I contribute to it?
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • “Don’t fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The saddest summary of life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.” ~Unknown

    Too often, we allow fear, worry, and doubt to dominate and define our lives. We allow them to steal our joy, our sleep, and our precious dreams.

    I made up my mind, very young, that I would push forward no matter what.

    I was 17 and pregnant when I married my boyfriend. We were young and foolish, and because our only plan was “love,” I gave birth to three more daughters by the age of 22. My last pregnancy was twins.

    Kristy, one of the twins, was born without a right hand. My biggest fear, at the time, wasn’t how we would make it financially, but how would Kristy make it?

    How would she hold a bottle or a swing? In a culture where we worship physical beauty, how would she adapt?

    Kristy faced many struggles, but she was a fighter, and she pushed back. Hard!

    She held her bottle with one hand. After she sucked it down, she would toss it, grab her sister’s bottle, and drink hers as well. She learned how to swing by putting the right chain in the crux of her elbow.

    Her biggest struggles were in school, where she was teased, mocked, and bullied. It was painful to watch, but her sisters helped protect her.

    She was determined to keep up with her sisters. She followed their lead and learned to play soccer and basketball in elementary school. She would go on to play sports for two years at the University of Chicago.

    One of Kristy’s biggest fears was that boys wouldn’t want to date her. She didn’t date in high school. However, I don’t think it was because of her physical challenge but because she challenged them in sports and would beat them—their egos were bruised!

    Today Kristy is 35. She was married last month. I think Pete is a great match for her. He is strong, has a lot of energy, and participates in marathons as well!

    If you want to know happiness and realize your dreams, you have to be willing to take a leap of faith despite being afraid.

    Too often, we hold back and play it safe, in order to avoid becoming successful, feeling embarrassed, looking silly, being hurt, and facing rejection or possible failure.

    We cling to fear from our childhood, traumatic experiences, and the negative media, like Linus, from the cartoon strip, Peanuts, clings to his security blanket.

    It’s our responsibility to acknowledge, face, and dissolve our fear.

    Are you willing to begin now, to dig for the courage to do all the things you were meant to do, but haven’t yet begun? If the answer is yes read on!

    The following tips will allow you to face fear and put it in its place.

    1. Get comfortable with fear.

    Invite fear into your life. When you fear something, move toward it. Feel it, and breathe through it.

    Do the things that frighten you. Action builds courage. Tell yourself, “This fear will pass.” Your world expands as your courage expands.

    2. Make your dominant thoughts positive.

    Fearful thoughts attract more fear. Positive thoughts attract success. Instead of expecting the worst, train your mind to expect the best. Make positive assumptions about your future.

    3. Don’t give time, attention, or energy to fear.

    Hold yourself accountable. Be consistent, be prepared, be dependable, and focus on solutions.

    Be innovative, take the initiative, and go the extra mile. If you don’t take action despite your fear, opportunity will pass you by.

    4. Never dwell on scarcity.

    Learn to think, speak, and live as an abundant person. Turn off the news. Celebrate what you have. Be generous.

    Focus your attention on being ready, willing, and prepared for the beauty, wonder, connections, good fortune, and favorable circumstances that are yours if you are willing to work and be open to it.

    5. Revisit your victories.

    Strengthen your belief in yourself by reflecting on the last three years of your life and every success you’ve experienced.

    Close your eyes and feel the celebratory emotion of each one. Bring the same drive, persistence, and talent into now and allow it to inspire and motivate you.

    6. Live vicariously through the victories of others.

    Use the success stories of others. Read how the Brooklyn Bridge was built. Study the success of Steve Jobs, Walt Disney, Steven Spielberg, and Oprah Winfrey. Take note of the courage they developed and follow their path to greatness.

    7. Ask your family and friends for encouragement.

    My family can see my strength when I forget I have it. At my request, they don’t hesitate to remind me of all trials and triumphs we have come through. They’re generous with praise and encouragement. Ask your loved ones to do the same for you.

    8. Create a support group of friends or colleagues.

    Robert Folgrum said it best in his book, All I Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten: “When you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.” Sticking together makes tough times easier and easier times more fun!

    9. Plan to be great.

    Step into your power and dream big. Follow it up with calculated risks and deliberate action steps. Have no doubt about your success. Your dreams are at stake here!

    You have the power to do what it takes to break through any obstacles that stand in the way of yourself, your dreams, and your happiness.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
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