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depression, surgery 2 wks ago

llfoster22lllfoster22 Posts: 14
edited 06/11/2012 - 9:02 AM in Depression and Coping
i am doing well physically, no pain, up and walking, so why all of a sudden am i crying having "dark thoughts" thinking about my life, lots of "shoulds" i should have been better mother, where is all this from, anyone else feel like this


  • I've had uncontrollable pain shooting down my left leg since about May 2011. Got an mri, and it showed a cynovial cyst at L4-5. Had a surgery (laminoforaminotomy) in late november,2011 to remove this cyst from L4-5. Docs said it was caused by alignment problems and degeneration in the facet joint. 7 weeks later it grew back, same pain all over again. Had a TLIF on April 2. About 3 weeks post-op. I can sort of identify with what you are feeling right now. I walk around the house acting "mopey" a good part of the day. Things I normally do, "bore me" and I do a lot of thinking and analyzing about everything, it make for a reeaal, reeaal, reeaal long day. BUT I KNOW THIS,"THIS IS NOT A PERMANENT SITUATION". Just remember to try to think positive. I know this sounds like a hard thing to do. Just try to do your best, Remember these feelings are only going to be a temporary thing.
  • thank you so much for your kind words, i do need to hear that this is only temporary. and to be reminded to think positively i hope your recovery goes well and these days of blue feelings get shorter for us. but like you said (thank you) it takes our own effort to remember this will go away to not let the dark thoughts get so big
  • I had both my knees replaced at the same time and was in a hospital bed a LOT for 7 weeks and boy did I have the blues BIG time. Your normal ;)

    My Dr even told me that sometimes the sleep meds they use in the OR can cause depression, weird dreams, thoughts etc.

    However if you are worried then I seriously would talk to your DR.
    L1 - S2 "gone" useless in 1 way or another. DDD. RA. Bone Spurs. Tons of nerve damage/issues. Stenosis. Both knees replaced. 50 yrs old. I had a great fall (hence my user name) at age 41 and it has been a domino effect every since.
  • many people have it after surgery myself included .i was ;;;depressed ;;; for about 2 month post surgery .it NORMAL .don't worry if will go .wont start getting worried about it .i remember crying in the shower and feeling so frail i could not believe it .anything would set me off .its because your body has been to hell and back and been pumped full of very strong drugs and it take a lot longer to get rid of the drugs that you would think.just take it easy and if you are still worried after a couple of months then seek medical advice .
    tony {UK}
    1997 laminectomy
    2007 repeat laminectomy and discectomy L4/L5
    2011 ALIF {L4/L5/S1}
    2012 ? bowel problems .still under investigation
    2014 bladder operation may 19th 2014
  • thank you for responding to my post. i am now 4 weeks out no more depression you were right, it is temporary. thanks again for your support!
  • thank you so much for sharing your experience, just a week to wait for my op so if same happens to me at least i will think back to this thread and be reassured it is a normal part of recovery, i do hope your recovery goes from strength to strength! thank you again.
  • Things could always be better. I've faced so many things through my life and come out the other side. This winter has been the darkest for my mind though. I sort of hit a wall as far as recovery and want it to keep getting better but this is it I'm thinking but I know it takes time. My first two surgeries 20 years ago, it took 5 years before I was walking some what normal. Still painful but a lot better the before with the pinched nerves every other month. Then I'd spend a month on my back. So that's better. It's hard to look at the big picture when your in the middle of a pile of stress. Pain, stress, anxiety all seem to go together. Some days I'll have pain where I can't even follow a lecture because my minds is busy trying to suppress the pain. Those days are so taxing. Lately I'm pushing myself to keep building to build my way out of depression. My mind is thinking about what I'm doing and the meds. help suppress pain to let me keep going. Just some days the meds don't seem to work. Going to a pain management doctor on Tuesday the 22nd. Hope to get some answers and a direction to go. The things I can't do becomes parts of who I am being taken away. I'm becoming less and less of who I was. Won't be dancing any time soon or running miles.

    the deer friend, Bob
  • I had my 2nd surgery check-up Thurs. I told my Dr. that the 1st surgery was amazing. No pain, felt ready to get back to my old self, etc..

    Suprise! I re-herniated. It's been 2 weeks since the 2nd surgery and my doc prescribed Zoloft.

    He says it's not so much that I had an 2nd operation, it's mostly because some people don't realize that even though they felt good to begin with, when this happens, you come to the realization that yes-your back sometimes REALLY is that messed up and NO-you will be NOT doing the things you normally did before for a while. ( A long while it seems). He says it DOES get better.

    I hope so, because as a person who can usually find something funny in the worst situations, I haven't found one thing to smile about in about 3 wks. :(

    I wish all of us luck who are having problems. HUGS!
  • I've been feeling rather blue all winter and spring. I find that it gets painful to walk even around the house at times. I don't have pain in my back but in my legs. They also feel weak. I was doing the bike at PT and that's when my knee went crazy in pain. It's been like that for two years now. I wonder how much pain a person can take because it keeps me from listening to lectures. I had to have a second surgery 2 years after the first one to get rid of scare tissue that built up. They opened up the nerve root too. Recovery doesn't happen over night. I wasn't walking "normal" for about 5 years after the second surgery. I'm at a point now where recovery isn't happening so fast. That's depressing. It takes days to do things I did in one. I saw a video a friend did about a guy that was in a wheel chair who is now walking again.
    Hearing his story makes me want to do more and I will too. I hope I get out of it what I put in. Don't know if I'll be dancing all night again. Well that's okay just want to get around more.

    It's cold and raining here and so I'm aching all over. Well time to get to bed and SNL.

  • llfoster - super!!!!!!!! :D
    L1 - S2 "gone" useless in 1 way or another. DDD. RA. Bone Spurs. Tons of nerve damage/issues. Stenosis. Both knees replaced. 50 yrs old. I had a great fall (hence my user name) at age 41 and it has been a domino effect every since.
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