But the emotional pain. The pain that brings you to tears multiple times a day. The job I loved SO much for 10 years is all but gone now. Going from being a strong, independent woman to having to rely on my boyfriend to support me and help me just pick up my laptop or open a bottle of soda some days. I didn't have to think about being motivated because I just was and now it takes an hour to get the energy to get in the shower after I take my son to school. Going from being someone who could sleep 8 hrs easily everynight to being lucky to get 4 in a 24 hr period. And I try to sleep alot.
And what makes it all so much worse...?
How about dealing with the nurses and/or doctors who just really don't get it. I'm in enough pain and it's affecting every area of my life the last thing I want is to be talked down to by these 'professionals'. Friday as I was finishing up an MRI and the doc at the hospital was prescribing me essentially all the Fentanyl and Dilaudid I wanted, there at the hospital through IV, because they had been trying for over an hour to just relieve a bit of pain. I was even showing signs of pain while under max sedation so they kept pumping Fentanyl and Versed into me. Now at the exact same time as all this is going on, my nurse at the clinic was leaving me a message saying they wouldn't prescribe me anything for the weekend and I shoud go to the ER if I have any more pain (only have it 24/7). Because I had left a message asking for some pain meds the day before. I haven't had a prescription for almost 3 months. Anyways, my thought is this was really the last thing I wanted to deal with. I left the hospital and when I checked my voicemail I immediately called and left a message for the nurses at the clinic which of course was never returned. I just get so frustrated dealing with 'professionals'. They believe it's their way or no way but I'm not so much a believer of that theory. I'll go find another dr. I've got WAY to many medical issues to be dealing with nurses who think they know everything. One even lied to my Mayo nurse last week because she was too lazy to place an order. I eventually got the lie resolved and the procedure ordered but I just don't need those stressors from 'professionals' I've turned to for help.
So I guess I'm really just venting about the care I've been getting from the nursing staff at the clinic. I hate to switch my PCP again since I've finally got this one pretty close to understanding me and some of my medical oddities. So I'm going to call the office on Monday and talk to my PCP and let him know what went on in the office last week when he was out of town. If he doesn't do anything about his staff treating patients this way then I'm gone.