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This is what I want

This tread is pretty much open to whatever your feelings are.
Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com


  • Is that specific enough?

    I truly am amazed by the bravery and resolve of so many in this forum that have it so much worse than me.

    Suffering with these pinched nerves is enough to drive me crazy!! I am so happy for the understanding & support I have found in these forums!

    Thanks & Good Luck to all!

    L5S1 REMOVED herniation. Years of pain & compression. Microdiscectomy complete!! Trying to be super smart & safe with recovery!
  • MarniMMarni Posts: 45
    edited 08/28/2012 - 11:28 AM
    I want to be the person I was BEFORE all my back problems. I want to live without the uncertainty of what tomorrow will bring . I want to be the wife, mother, daughter and friend I always expected myself to be. I want to thank everyone on this site who opens their heart, shares their experiences and sometimes, just listens with empathy. I've only been a member a short while, and I truly don't know what I did for the last 15 years without SH!!!

    May we all have more 'good days' ahead.
  • I want to live without pain - even if it's just for 1 day!
  • I want to LIVE,LAUGH and SING. I want to dance when the urge strikes me. I want to touch my husband when I want to not when the pain allows me to. I want to work hours and hours on end without the pain making me stop. I want to be able to pick up my grand-babies when ever they want me to. I want to be able to leave my house and not worry if I have enough of my pain med with me. I want to go to my son football game and not worry about they pain being so bad that I have to leave. I want to take country drives with my husband and not be in pain. I want to clean my house and not be in bed for 3 days or so. I want to take long walks in the woods. I want to go hiking with my family. I want to go camping and not worry about the pain.I want to stop seeing the doctors and doing test.. I want to be NORMAL and PAIN FREE.. What is it I want ? MY LIFE BACK!
    shiela diodati
  • I want to know my surgeon will wake up the morning of my surgery and be alert, feeling well, undistracted and ready to do his best work ever!

    I want to know that if I have issues with pain after surgery I will be heard and treated with utmost respect, and not be viewed as a patient who is drug seeking! This scares me more than having surgery.

    I want to know that I will do everything I can to heal well and maintain a healthy state of mind.

  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,833
    I hear what you are saying.. But at the same time, I am thinking that many of the things you want to do can be done.
    Its sort of like a debit/credit system. We make deposits (the good things for our spine) and then we take out credits (when we do things that will place a strain on our spine).
    So, its sort of like picking and deciding what is the priority. I know, it would be great to be able to do all of that. But, for many of us, that might be something that is out of the picture. But, we can still find those things we love and prepare for it.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • Good morning, Yes you are right. I can do those things still and I should be thankful I can do them when my body allows me too (On credit). Yesterday was a bad day. It was raining and I have had insomnia for a while now. However I just want to be able to do what my family does. We were the spur of the moment kind of people and now I watch the season change right in front me from my window. I spent a lot of time on here yesterday reading other people stories and I realized I was lucky. I was able to be kid and do kid things, some of these young people never got to do that. Then I read the spoon theory. I realize what I want is not to be in pain. But most of all is I decided I want to live and I am going to. Everyday I will do one thing for myself and I will push myself to do that task. If I cant pick my grand baby up then I will sit him on lap. If I cant walk in the woods. Then I will sit at the state park. I know I will have bad days like yesterday. But I will also have good days like today. I have to remember I am only human and I can only do what I can do. I think my biggest fear is hurting myself worse and I know that if I allow the pain to get out of control it so hard to get it back under-control, so I think sometimes I might also limit myself and not push myself enough.. I need to stop being afraid.. So to you question. my answer is. I do not want to be AFRAID anymore.
    shiela diodati
  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,730
    To be pain free with no drugs, no surgery.
    I would gladly consider everything I've lost. everything I've suffered over the years. As a down payment on this. And no hard feelings.
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
  • Brain picks up on no pain real fast trust me! There has been times injection stoped the pain for short term and the boost of energy i felt was like a high wanting to do many things and did some as its such a great feeling just to go fishing and not feel the stress of the pain and able to walk normal and stand normal without feeling like legs will give out any moment,

    People that dont have this kind of spine issue have no idea how good they have it and how simple things are for them and they cant enjoy simple things in life that most of us would kill for ! They complain about life when they have no reason to complain as they are healthy and dont have any idea how much worse life could be simply because they never been where most of us have been and going !
    If they can find a reason to complain then you damn right we have more rights to complain when our complaint has basis and they have nothing,

    The finacial hardship alone that comes with a spine injury to many is enough to go over the edge ! I dont know of anyone who is enjoying the financial riches becoming disabled and giving up a good paying job to collect ssdi as if it was a career choice and enjoying any benefits of having a spine injury,

    But trust me there are morons out there in the world who think some of us have it made as we lost our ability to work and forced to deal with our spine health and have no idea what our life has become ,
    And of course those are the people who ask us for sympathy as there life is always so complicated so they think and we need to feel sorry for them so they think because of course there life should always be more important to us then our own life and i am sure i am not the only 1 who have noticed this around me with family and friends who suround us !

    Now you tell me! Am i the only 1 who knows people like that out in the real world or do i speak for majority here say I !

    For the few who dont know what i am talking about consider yourself lucky if most people understand your situation within your family and friends,

    Fact remains is society frowns upon anything other then whats concidered norm and most cases dont understand many spine conditions along with many other conditions and no you are not just assuming maybe you are over reacting to people when it seems they dont get it, They realy dont get it and never will !

    Why should they get it if they dont have it, They know they dont want it and thats all they need to know,

    So if you already had every surgery under the sun and next person asks you, Why dont you have a dr fix it ?
    Just pretend you never thought about going to see a dr about it and let them think they just had a brain storm and now you are on your way to beter living and life long hapiness thanks to there help,

    You will save yourself a lot of time and frustration trying to wake up every brain cell 1 by 1 in other persons head thats stuck in stupid !

    Ok so what was the topic here again? Oh feelings ! Well i cant share my feelings as all can see, I am much too reserved !

    Flexicore ADR 2004 resulting nerve damage l4l5 Fusion 2006 same level, 2009 hardware removal with lami !
    2012 scs implant ,
  • It cool to put energy in to helping others! But at the end of the day its also ok to put the energy in ourself as everyone has to look out for #1. And no shame in puting ourself 1 st when dealing with such severe spine issues,
    Nobody will look out for you beter then yourself !

    And i dont mean to sound selfish but hopefuly my posts reflect how i learned to deal with my situation dealing with my personal chronic pain and how i learned to draw strength to go on living even when life dealt us a bad hand ,

    My view of the world in a comical way helps me deal with a bad situation and my hope is that others as well can laugh at themself no mater how bad things are and even if its a twisted view of things in the world , Its ok to be a litle twisted sister !
    Flexicore ADR 2004 resulting nerve damage l4l5 Fusion 2006 same level, 2009 hardware removal with lami !
    2012 scs implant ,
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