I have a posterior spinal fusion schedule for Oct. 29. The closer it gets to my surgery date the more panicked I feel. It doesn't help that my boss seems to think that my surgery isn't necessary and that "I just need to loose some weight." Instead of being supportive and understanding, she keeps pointing out how inconvenient it is that I'll be off for 8-12 weeks. She actually told me that I should have considered her vacation and feelings when I considered surgery!
Besides work I can't seem to quiet my mind and quit playing worse case scenario. I've never had a surgery before and I've never been in the hospital. I'm so fearful of the unknown. I've made several lists and I've arranged for a family member to stay with me for a few weeks, but I still don't feel prepared. The pain keeps me pretty limited in what I can do so there isn't much to take my mind off my worry. I'm also don't have much of a support system. I'm also trying to quit smoking, and that is pretty much impossible at this point with the anxiety and panic attacks. I have an appointment with my PCP on Tuesday to discuss my panic attacks and smoking. I'm hoping there are some meds that can help.
I'm really trying be positive but its really hard. I know that I've got to be driving my best friend crazy with all of my worrying. Is anybody else feeling this anxiety? And, how are you dealing with it?
PILF of L5 S1 on October 29, 2013. Psoriatic arthritis, spondylolisthesis L5 and fractured L5 and DDD