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I feel so sad, why?

Mary GMMary G Posts: 1
edited 11/10/2014 - 9:26 AM in New Member Introductions
Two weeks ago i had L4L5S1 fused. Im doing very well physically. Im 73 yr old woman, my husband/caregiver is 78. Hes doing an excellent job of taking care of me but sometimes i just feel so heavy and sad and i cry for a lit y le bit. This is not like (me usually. I dont mind crying but has anyone else experienced this. Of course i have to rely on my husband a lot.


  • LizLiz Posts: 7,832

    Liz, Spine-health Moderator

    Spinal stenosis since 1995
    Lumber decompression surgery S1 L5-L3[1996]
    Cervical stenosis, so far avoided surgery
  • Welcome to Spine-Health Mary.
    Well.. you are going through a lot having recently had surgery, you may not like having to rely on your husband to help with your healing. Of course, there is nothing wrong with needing some help, but some of us don't always do well with it. Also, this is that time of year, when the days are getting shorter & shorter, and the time change (if you have EST in your area), doesn't help matters.

    I do suffer from seasonal depression (though not every fall/winter), and understand that sad, heavy feeling that you mention. The best I can offer is that finding something you can enjoy during your recuperation, and keeping your mind and hands busy can help a lot. Good movie/s, puzzles, music, etc., whatever you enjoy. I hope you feel better soon.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,839
    Anytime we are not feeling up to par and for reasons we have not always been able to control or understand, different emotions can easily surface.

    For you it was crying, just like hundreds of others, then there are those that smile, hundreds of them, going through the exact same thing, but just view it differently

    Human nature is so very hard to rationalize.

    As long as you dont let it consume you, consider yourself normal.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • skiingcowsskiingcow Posts: 9
    edited 01/31/2015 - 5:04 PM
    your post touched me, and I want to tell you that you are not alone. I hope things are better for you now and to try to keep strong and positive. I am 42 yrs old and I have had to have an l5/s1 fusion recently. I too have had to rely on my husband and boys heavily, I feel so guilty about it. I feel sad often too. I am sending my best to you.
  • Mary,
    I think that you may be feeling a lot of things that are related to pain and recovery. Your body and mind are going through so much chemically that you can't really hold your actions up as rational, you know? Please be kind and gentle to yourself and with yourself as you heal.

    It's hard to rely on others to help you, but please know that everybody needs help sometimes. Ask yourself if you would mind doing these things for your husband. You love him, I'm sure, so I am reasonably comfortable in saying that you wouldn't mind helping him in any way that you can. He probably wants to do all he can to be there for you through this because he can see how hard this is for you and for those you love. But please, don't be worried about talking to him, and just saying what's on your heart and mind. Just be real and as honest as you can and know that, from what you've posted, that he's there for you.

    In the meantime, please be kind yourself. Recovery from any surgery is hard. It sometimes takes a while to feel like you again. There's no shame in that. Please know that I am thinking of you with good thoughts.

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