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Hi everyone, so happy to find you!

OverItAllOOverItAll Posts: 89
edited 03/21/2015 - 10:18 AM in New Member Introductions
Hi everyone- I also happy to find you here! I am hoping to finally get this back stuff treated and done once and for all as I am a busy mom, business owner and wife who desperately wants to get back to all of that and take care of them instead of the reverse.

I am looking at a possible fourth surgery(micro discectomies, repairs-emergency surgery for burst dic, decompression and fusion in previous surgeries) with a second fusion and totally freaking out in my head while trying to be a normal busy mom, among other things. After almost 10 years of dealing with chronic and acute pain, neuropathic and muscular, stemming all from my S1-L5 and L4-5 levels with countless rounds of PT, medication, spinal shots, doctors, chiropractors, etc. it was nice to find somewhere that others have been there done that.

I have posted on the spinal surgery threads too, the thread is " in review", so I am not sure if it is posted yet.

I am battling with the how I feel about all of this. I was receiving epidural shots for a pain management from a physiatrist, who essentially passed me back to the neurosurgeon after putting me back on gabapentin, flexeril and oxycodone. I am meeting with a new neurosurgeon next week(we've moved since my last surgery, this is a highly recommended neuro by the previous surgeon, who is a consulting physician over the phone in all of this until I have a new neurosurgeon).

I feel defeated, afraid, angry, scared bu trying to be hopeful. Nothing is more frustrating and frightening than a doctor afraid to treat without me seeing another doctor. I get why, I have been here before, only this time I knew I needed X-rays- both kinesthetic and traditional, mri, PT and medication. I know what the answers were in the past to none of these working and I also have learned that my pain tolerance is fairly high, so this is real and not in my head. Last time I had these symptoms, which were not as bad as they are now, a dime sized bone chip was found compressing my nerve and causing a spinal fluid leak when removed- that same surgery I had a fusion at s1-L5 and decompression atl4-5( so wished they had just done the double fusion).

I want my life back, as currently I basically survive until I can lay down flat and get the symptoms to subside, or medicate, or both. I am trapped in an energetic mind and a body in pain. The past three years have been me in pain, or recovering from pain, or in surgery, or recovering from surgery. My life feels like I am watching everyone else zip by and I am so over it all.

I try to remind myself that this is temporary, but after three surgeries in two years time, it feels endless. I am so thankful I found these forums, but wish I didn't need them.

Thanks for listening!

Link to duplicate post......

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