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What's going on with me?

AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,670
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:19 AM in Matters of the Heart
I'm scheduled for surgery July 31st at UCSF. I'm very confident with my doctors and it will be a relief to be pain free after 2 years of chronic pain. Here's my question:

I've been more depressed since I found out about this surgery than I ever remember being in my life. I should be happy. I'm not terribly frightened, although I am a little apprehensive about the recovery, but shouldn't I be happy? Has this happened to anyone else? :?


  • Sorry you are feeling so low. I think it is normal to be depressed and apprehensive while going thru all that you have been thru! While you are looking forward to pain relief, wouldn't it be tough to be happy about any kind of surgery? Please try not to be so hard on yourself.I think you are feeling normal. I know that my depression and anxiety has certainly magnified since my diagnosis. Take care.---Mazy
  • I had my surgery at UCSF in February, 2006 with Dr. Phill W.

    PM me if you want to discuss anything.

    Cheers, Mate
  • I'm sure worrying and anxiety will bring on a certain sense of depression. Maybe that mixed with any meds you are on could be causing it? I think the happiness will come post-op and the pain starts to go away. Good luck and you might want to ask doc about it.
  • Knucklehead,

    Perhaps the discomfort you know is easier to deal with than the unknown? It's tough to come on this board and read about so many surgeries, especially the ones that didn't go as planned, and be totally optomistic about your own. Rest assured that most surgeries go completely smooth and withour complications during or after, and that you'll more than likely be in that category.

    2 years is a long time and it's scary to not know how your life will be after the surgery. Just try to look at the positive side of it, the pain relief, the freedom to do all the things that you've been missing. Maybe you've had to leave a job you secretly hated and you're afraid you may have to go back? LOL

    I agree with agriman, it wouldn't hurt to have a talk with your doc about it. Just try not to worry too much. It's normal to stress about surgery and stress can take on many forms.

    Let us know how you're doing.

  • Hi Guys,

    Thanks for the comments. I'm feeling alittle better. My boss was wonderful when I told him I had to be off for 3 months. I think that was a lot of the apprehension I was feeling. That and the fact that my sister is staying with me for a week after surgery. Thank Gawd I'm going to be sedated! I don't know what I'm more afraid of - the surgery or living with my sister for a week! ;)
    I'm going on disability on the 21st so I can prepare myself and my home for recovery. I know as it gets closer you're all going to hear a lot more from me!
    Right now trying to deal with insurance and disablility is keeping me busy, as well as preparing my coworkers for my absence.

    Thanks again!
  • Hi Knucklehead,

    Going through this is such an emotional roller coaster and there is so much to take in. Add to that the apprehension of the surgery, and then after surgery is when the hardwork really starts because that's when you need to be so strong and focused to get through the recovery.

    I think it's normal to feel a bit depressed having to deal with all this but don't bottle up how you're feeling. Remember to come and vent here anytime you need to!

    Good luck with the surgery and stay focused on how much better you're gonna be afterwards! Hugs, Spicey
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