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Why is it so hard to get help and to diagnose what have wrong/ Why as soon as I enter doctor office

iamjmeiiamjme Posts: 9
edited 06/07/2015 - 11:36 AM in Neck Pain: Cervical
15 years ago a boyfriend tore my neck back smashing my head against a telephone pole and held me there for 10 minutes while blood gushed out of ears. I have lived with excruciating neck, shoulder, and arm pain since.
I was diagnosed with "whiplash: and it would go away, well it never went away and for 15 years I have probably been to 100 doctors trying to get answers.
All day everyday I am in agony tortured by my arms/neck and headache caused by it. I take care of a toddler by myself and I just want to cry. I dont understand why as soon as I so as enter a doctors office they automatically discount everything I say, like they dont believe me, and everything I say is followed by "MMMMHMMMM"....
Everytime I go to the doctor to try to get help I end I in tears. all they do it belittle me, minimize my pain, try to tell me Im imagining it????, dont believe me???WHY? I am just try to get help to live my life, why be so mean????????????????
I just want to be able to take care of my toddler without a headache everyday, why are these doctors so mean to me everytime I dont understand?
And I dont understand this pain, it is everywhere ever square inch of my arms shoulders. My shoulder and arms feel out of place and I have to click and pop them back into place all day, and neck has big bulge I have to stretch it and release it every 2 minutes all day.

My whole day consists of stretching my neck, holding for 10 seconds and letting go, followed by both arms. Its all I do all day every day, every 2 minutes literally. If you saw me in public all you would see is me with my neck to one side every 2 minutes literally.
I cant look up anymore, I cant look down anymore, I can barely get dressed anymore. I dread going outside because I have to have straps on my shoulders from my bra and any aggravation leads to headache that lasts for days.

I do everything to take care of my toddler and force myself to try to ignore the pain but its impossible. It widespread all over me, feels like arthritis everywhere. What is going on?

And why are these doctors so mean to me it makes it even worse I just cry and feel so alone with no help.

I finally got a MRI in November but aside from this what can I do?


  • It is very difficult when you feel a doctor is not taking you seriously and understand your pain. You don't mention if you have had an x-ray or MRI scan or treatment from an osteopath for alignment or massage to help with muscle tension. Pain has a massive affect on muscle positions as it can make muscles pull the body away from an injury. I experienced this with a massive left hand tilt to my body when my lumbar disc herniated.

    I have suffered domestic violence in the past and during a doctor's consultation the doctor said we needed to work out why I choose men like that, as if it was a problem created by me!! I never visited that doctor again but took advice from another doctor to attend CBT therapy. This was to learn how to change my thought processes to help me break the circle of behaviour, because I would never change another persons behaviour, just deal with it in a different way. I have never worked out to this day is he was referring to my ex or the doctors behaviour :-) !! It has helped me deal with all challenging behaviour in my life so guess it helped with both.

    You are entitled to further investigations if necessary to help you with your pain so I hope you are able to get a doctor to help you get further treatment.

    Good luck and well done on coping with chronic pain

    L5/S1 herniation Apr 2013
    nerve root injections Oct 2013
    L5/S1 discectomy Jan 2014
    L5/S1 nerve roo &, facet joint injections & edpidural Jan 2015
    L5/S1 revised discectomy, L4/L5 discectomy & Wallis Inswing Stabilisation L4/L5 May 1st 2015

  • Hi can anyone help? I have four pf the disks in my neck are herniated one of which is so close to the spinal cord that its worrying. I also have spinal stenosis from it loss of cerebral spinal fluid plus impingement of a spinal nerve at c7 dr recommend epidural cervical injections but I read they are more dangerous than lumber injections please any good experiences of these injections anyone? I don't know the best route to take all I know is im in constant pain & get numbness , stinging sensations & pain in shoulders arms back & head every day can't cope . sorry for going on but I don't have anyone to talk to my gp is not very helpful thsnks in advance :')
  • It sounds like you've reached the point where the pain and suffering can no longer be tolerated. Go forward with the MRI and keep making appointments and undergoing treatments until you get the right diagnosis and have a proper course of action to follow.
  • You had a MRI, that's usually the first step towards a diagnosis then treatment follows. So did you get a diagnosis?
    ACDF C6/C7 on 05/20/15
    ...and it was the best decision of my life :-)
  • itsautonomicitsautonomic LouisianaPosts: 1,807
    edited 06/08/2015 - 11:47 AM
    Whiplash can become chronic if not treated properly early on and from there can develop some neurological effects and pain syndromes. What type dr u seeing?
    Do your due dilegence, trust you know your body and question everything if it does not fit. Advocate for yourself and you will be suprised what will be revealed trusting your body and instinct.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,856
    whiplash is a difficult condition and there are not a lot of solid tests to prove it one way or the other.

    Doctors need to identify a cause of a problem. If that can not be done in standard clinical examinations, then additional diagnostic tests will be ordered to isolate the problem.

    But keep in mind, what your pain level is and frustration does not equate to any doctor immediately coming up with a solution.
    This all can take time.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,856
    Sent you a private message.
    You should probably start your own thread
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • You mentioned you had an MRI, what were the results? If a doctor isn't taking you seriously go to another doctor until you find one who will. Wolfpack's advice is my advice.
    I had to go to four different doctors until I found one willing to investigate what was causing all my pain and willing to help me. My MRI didn't show everything that was going on in my neck. I had a torn ligament and a severely herniated disc and all MRI showed was a slight herniated disc. But I knew from the agony I was in for 19 months that there was more going on,mom continued seeing different doctors until I found the one who ultimately helped me.
    There are feat doctors out there, you just have to be your biggest advocate and be stubborn. Eventually you will find the help you need. Your abusive boyfriend probably did more damage than you realize. You could have torn ligaments in your neck which don't heal on their own, he could have ruptured a disc, the possibilities are endless. If it's been a while since your MRI I would advise you to get another one to get a more up to date picture.
    I am so sorry you suffered this horrible abuse and have to be reminded of it constantly with your pain. I pray you find the help you need.
  • sandi123ssandi123 Posts: 456
    edited 07/01/2015 - 3:02 AM
    Have you consulted with a board certified spine surgeon? If not, that's where you need to start. How long ago was the MRI taken and what did the report say?
    One thing that probably is not helping is constantly popping your neck or shoulders, in fact doing that can create problems, including severe muscle spasms.
    Try some of the over the counter pain and muscle topical ointments and creams, and perhaps one of the over the counter TENS units available in pharmacies that is reusable to help with the muscle strain. You might be amazed at how helpful that can be.

  • I understand your frustration to a degree. I have it a little easier because I only have 4 legged kids. One thing that does help me, on the really bad pain days I go with the strapless bras. I have been dealing with chronic pain for 50 years because of people not believing me or wanting to help. I was going through my folders, (I keep copies of everything) and discovered that back in the early 80's I was placed in a mental facility for my headaches, the same headaches that I am going to be starting physical therapy for. It took about 30+ years for someone to finally take me seriously. Hopefully it won't take that long.
  • Thank you everyone for your kind words it means a lot, thanks for taking me so seriously I am really at a bad point with this. I was also assaulted about 20 more times by the next boyfriend, he hurt my neck knowing it was injured.(needless to say I am done with abusers) And also in 4 MVA with whiplash accidents after the original so my neck has really been through so much.
    I went to a massage therapist for the first time she said I have absolutely no movement in my C1 and C2 what ever that means, I may try another appointment but it seems useless because I feel everything she manages to "heal" is counteracted the next week with my daily activities like lifting a toddler and its back to square one?
    I also realized I have something with my arms I have had my whole life, I can twist my arm all the way around almost like I am double jointed. I have never had any doctor look at this but I am wondering if this condition is somehow making my arms and neck worse? I wake up a few times a night by my arm and shoulder clicking so loud back into place. There is an area in my back triceps that need to be stretched for pain relief so many times a day its very weird. I didnt have any pain before I was assaulted though so I just feel maybe the arm condition is amplifying the neck injury somehow( and vise versa). Where would I even begin to find info on this?
    It just feels like I have some unknown pain that doctors are not able to help me with. I mean they can put a man on the moon but they cant figure out whats wrong with me.
    I have tried Dr'Hos before 15 years ago I didnt have much luck maybe if I try a different type of TENS from a pharmacy thanks for suggestions. Is there any hope in a over the door traction? Currently I put a long nlyon over the side of my neck and lie on my side and pull the area that feels compressed. Could home traction help?
    I finally got a MRI for November I hope it will show something but scared it wont as that will just give more power to the doctors to discredit me.

    My first MRI 7 years ago didnt show anything but I couldn't keep still because it hurt my arms too much she was barely able to get a clear image., my neck has been through a lot more trauma since.
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