I'm hoping that there might be some people who have gone through a pregnancy and raising children with serious back injury and long-lasting chronic pain.
I have complex failed fusion between L2-L3 and L4-L5, the lower one has never fused and the upper has fused in a rotated position causing scoliosis and kiphosis. I have lots of disk degeneration and lots of pain, both muscular and neural.
I am so scared I just won't be able to manage if the weight of bearing a child increases my pain significantly, not to mention doing futher damage during pregnancy or childbirth, not to mention then carrying and caring for a young child.
My doctor has been pretty vague, saying he's not sure how it will affect things, offering little advice and leaving me very much to make my own decision.
I'm not in the best situation relationship wise as it's a very new relationship, and whilst the father is a great guy and would be supportive and loving as best he could, i don't think he really understands the day-to-day realities of living with chronic pain as we're not living together and havn't been together long enough. He has lots of other commitments with work and three children from his previous marriage so i guess i feel like it'd have to manage myself so a large extent.
I'm in the really early stages of pregnancy and seriously close to having an abortion, but just wanted to hear from any mums who have managed to make it work whilst living with chronic pain - I long so deeply to have children and i worry that as my back has been getting worse over the last 12 years and is continuing to degenerate i might really regret terminating this pregnancy.
I'm nearly 30 now but the reality of chronic pain makes my body feel so much older - and i worry that if i;m struggling so much with my own, pain, lack of work/roles/meaning, depression... maybe i'm just not able to be a mother!?!?!
This feels like its ripping my heart in two... the limits of by body/pain/injury crushing the dreams i have for life and love and building a family.
Hope to hear from people with some experience of this,
Thanks so much