Forgive me for getting right to the point of my problems. Im hurting so bad all over, even using my finger tips to post this I have tears running down my face I have cervical hernated disc C5-C7..along with spinal neuropathy due from contracting Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever from tick 4 yrs ago. Wasnt expected to survive but here I am..feeling once Blessed that I lived now sitting wondering why. I have seen a lot of doctors over the years & many trips to ER. Had a pain management Dr. once that got upset due to I removed pain patch in her office due to I had blisters around site..next thing I know im being told Im being discharged for going to have dental surgery & getting pain meds (same ones she had already had me on) but I had called and asked if I could get med filled young lady answered phone said yes as long as it was same meds I was already on. That Dr continued to see me three months later not mentioning anything until the day I took pain patch off..arguing with me that patch wasnt causing the blister. WTH it was around the patch oozing watery blood. Now its on my record DISCHARGED like Im a drug addict. Never failed a test..never missed an appointment..always had more pills than required during pill count. (I hate taking pills). Could not find a doctor to take my daily severe pain over after that. Now I lost my job we are a very low income family..no medical insurance..no meds to help with pain in need of cervical surgery bad..no doctors..hospital says nothing they can do for this that I need surgery. My pain now is debilitating. Even my bed sheets hurt touching me..I sleep 2-4 hrs every night I cry most of day..depressed..came so close taking mylife until my son happened to walk in before I did it. Another few minutes I would not be doing this postm I cant drive..barely can walk..I have fell..I have three sons grown and a girl 11 years old. I love t by email more than anything but my daughter helps me as uf she is my mother. I hear her crying about she wants a normal mom who can do things with her. I no longer have any friends..I have nobidy that emotionally supports me..my family makes me feel as if Im a big burden on them. I have yelled top of my lungs due to Im mad I woke the hell up to endure another long day in this messed up hell I live in. Im 43 yrs old..my life is over..Im the dead breathing. I use to be a loving happy always on the go..full of life..thanking God for another beautiful day..to living in pure hell feeling my body in gulf of fire on a daily basis. Im not living any more Im just here taking up space and suffering. Only peace I get at all from this pit of fire and pain that Im in..is the little few hours I sleep so I figure If I stay sleep..how great the thought not to feel this pain any more. I dont take day to day..its to long for me I pray what seems like every min of every day I can make it through next 60 seconds without putting myself out of this hell. With no insurance..dont qualify in Va for medicade..free clinics booked not taking anyone..dont qualify for credit or make payment arrangements cant afford my bills as it is in hopes right now I can keep lights on..food..roof over our heads...I have contacted everybody I can think of..reached out to The Governor's office..NOTHING!! I HAVE NO MORE FIGHT IN ME NOT EVEN AN OUNCE OF ENERGY TO EVEN CARE..IM TO WEAK AND TIRED.(ANEMIA.M.ASTHMA..CYST ON OVERY...MIGRAINES..ALL I WISH FOR IS HELP SOMEONE TO CARE TO GIVE MY DAUGHTER THE MOM TO SO MUCH DESERVES...I EVEN TAKE BEING PARALIZED AT LEAST I WONT HURT..I PRAY FOR IMMEDIATE SURGERY & PAIN MANAGEMENT..SO I CAN HAVE AND ENJOY MY LIFE..JUST A LITTLE I WILL BE OK..BETTER THAN NO LIFE..THIS PAIN IS BEYOND WHAT I CAN EXPLAIN AND ITS EVERYDAY NOW..ALL DAY..NEVER GIVES ME A BREAK TO JUST TAKE A BREATH..PLEASE SOMEONE IF YOU CAN BE MY MIRACLE OH HOW WILL I BE FOREVER GRWATFUL..WITHOUT A MIRACLE..COMING VERY SOON COULD BE TO LATE FOR ME..GOD FORGIVE ME BUT I CANT TAKE THIS MUCH LONGER!
Tired of hurting