In January 2013 I had my first MRI revealing an L5-S1 bulge, minor L4-L5 bulge, stenosis and arthritis (mainly on facets) because I was experiencing strange sensations down my left leg and severe back pain. I followed up with physical therapy, which was unsuccessful due to chronic pain and inflammation. The next step was facet injections followed up with PT, which was unsuccessful, so I followed up with another facet injection. When I accepted these methods of treatment weren't working, I quit seeing the doctors and just walked; I lost 35 pounds and found some relief August 2013- August 2014. The pain came back full force last August, however I was traveling and unable to see a doctor until January 2015. In March, I had another MRI followed up with a visit to the neurosurgeon, the way my bulging disc settled against my sciatic nerve was nearly debilitating, so they performed a discectomy March 24th. I had relief for approximately three months before I realized something was terribly wrong, as I was enduring more pain and different sensations down both legs, than ever before. Another MRI this month revealed a recurrent disc- the discectomy was unsuccessful. I will follow up with the neurosurgeon the 30th. I am finding several things very challenging- mostly my state of being- I am not accepting of my restrictions. I have always been able to provide for myself by working, and am unable to work at this time- it's killing me! I have a very supportive boyfriend, but my family hasn't been supportive or understanding at all. I'm wondering what comes next? More surgery? How long will I feel so helpless? I'm thankful for life; other than breathing and being alive, I'm terribly miserable. I'm in therapy for the emotional support and to learn coping skills. I'm tired of pain, tired of crying, tired of the sadness and anger (outrage).