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I am deeply saddened.....I never would have....

I have been on this site as a source of support and for guidance and information as all members have. In the past 16 months I went from being a healthy, active individual, in Feb I fell in july 2014 I had to have a simple procedure microdisectomy lead me through, several different medications, some which I had severe reactions too, 2 epidurals one leaving me with a "wet tap, the other just didn't work, 9 MRI's a bone scan, EMG, xrays, full blood panel, accusation of abuse, I've lost my job nearly lost my home, had to fight and be my own advocate to insist something was still wrong with me medically. I had numerous types of PT in the salt water on land and everything continued to make my pain increase. Which turns out I was right that finally one test which ive tried to post about, the discogram, was the only test to show I was having nerve damage due to the annular tear leaking on the nerve. Why this wasn't detected for 11 months I dk. I have never intentional offended anyone if you read my posts I have always tried to "in my own opinion" lend support advice ect. I am a kind person only 48 years old I've lost most my friends and family, because they don't know what its like or want to take the time to understand it, in 11 months. For anyone think my words were to be offensive it is far from that. Unfortunately that test lead me to a second surgery now a bone fusion, which now seems to have left me completely disabled. I have had many members PM me asking for help, sharing their kind words and vice versa, even thanking me.

I am nearly in tears.

I don't know why someone would report what my "opinion" may have been offensive I try to be sensitive to everyone. I thought thats what this site was developed for. Clearly I did. I will thank you all who have shared their painful stories its not easy to be on here and be vulnerable and make sure your saying things within the guidelines again thank you, who have asked for my help in my area of expertise. If you'd like to stay in touch outside of this website for those who weve developed a "spiney" friendship I wish you all the best leave me an email and I will keep in touch. I don't know who I offended that would warrant reporting me. I think we are going through very tough times, some completely new and unexpected like myself, and others who unfortunately have been dealing with this stuff for life times....its not only dealing with a physical ailment but mentally plays a toll on you as well. I believe freedom of speech but never intentional to hurt anyone I think we are going through enough of that already. I guess I'll just check in on a few of you periodically but will not longer contributing to the forums for fear something gets misconstrued. To whom every reported my PM as offensive I do not recall this conversation but do deeply apologize. I'm sure I was trying to empathize or comfort, or be able to speak more freely in a pm so we wouldn't offend others. Be well all...Continue to be your own advocate its the only power we have...
This can't be happening


  • I'm sorry that had happened to you. I hope you can now start feeling better after the fusion.maybe it was a mistake someone flagging you. I once hit the flag as offensive button while scrolling they on my iPad reading posts. I emailed and told them I didn't mean to do that. Maybe something like that happened to you? Can't they tell you what happened ?
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,877
    edited 11/14/2015 - 4:35 PM
    and that there was nothing in the 'flagged' offensive post by How did I get here that I viewed as having to take any corrective actions.
    There are times when we read those flagged, we in fact have to take some corrective steps.

    Not in this situation. I, nor any other moderator will be taking any action on that flagged as offensive. I am deleting that item. I do hope that it
    was sent by mistake.

    To date, I have not seen anything posted by How did I get here as being something that needed to be monitored.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • Thank you Lvn86, unfortunately the bone fusion has created me to be furthered disabled, in the last week I went through a nerve test again, an 7 mos PO CT and an MRI, I'm dealing with severe low back pain, tendenosis in right leg, atrophy, denervation, hypertrophy, continues loss of feeling in both legs my sacrum has shifted??? So I'm not sure whats my next step other then cry.

    And it was a PM I guess? I do understand people make errors.

    Ron. Thank you for looking into it.
    This can't be happening
  • Sheri76Sheri76 Michigan Posts: 497
    I accidentally flagged a post while scrolling down my phones screen also. I don't recall whose it was, but I PM'd the member and told them it was an accident. Maybe the person that flagged yours didn't even realize they did that.
  • Sheri76Sheri76 Michigan Posts: 497
    Is that the same as being tilted? My Dr said my sacrum felt a bit tipped, had X-rays done, not showing any fractures, but sending me back to surgeon for further tests (had L4-5 fusion last March, but had fallen a week after surgery, that's why just had X-rays). I've been having more sciatic symptoms (not as bad as pre surgery, though I haven't been able to go back to work yet, but nerve issues have increased the further out from fusion surgery). Hopefully just from inflammation, or a flare up.... if that's the best, that's what I'm hoping for.

    I hope you'll keep sharing your journey here, you are needed and wanted.
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    ....your tears! And I'm so sorry for that!

    If I'm understanding correctly, please consider, you are responding to what could have been accidental, or ...say a member expressed feeling offended opinion. I dunno.....

    But that was one person!
    One person should not be given so much power as to negate all the positives! ....the benefits and all friendships you have made here on this site! ....the support you've been to others.

    This really shows the power of words!
    Sometimes I would think about the people in my life, family and friends who are not understanding the new me.
    I grieved that I lost that friendship...sometimes to the point of dwelling on it and increasing my depression.

    But for me, it helped considerably and changed my perspective to not only...consider that person has their own issues and
    I can't take it personally ....as it only hurts me.
    But also, to not allow that negative energy to interfere with the positives of my life....the people who are sticking with me and trying to understand and be there for me. They are deserving of my energies!

    It was like my eyes could only see the negative person and their words....and as if I turned my back on those who care and do surrounding me.
    Since that discovery in my life, I turned to the friendships with a new appreciation!

    Whenever you get a community of people, like this site, it's a reflection of the personalities we experience in our personal lives.
    Learning how to understand, people have opinions...and that people have the power to hurt.
    People we love dearly, we still may disappoint, hurt them and feel misunderstood by them.
    My people are the ones I choose to go through life with....the ups and downs and the "what the heck are you talking about?" :)

    I would bet that whatever happened causing these feelings to you....that person who offended, if intentional even, has moved on...
    no further thought of you, nor any consideration to how you may have been hurt.
    Support people in our lives, often hold us up as we recover from such a blow.
    But the power is not with the one who hurt you, it's within yourself to choose your response.

    For myself, with all this pain and its many complications, I feel more vulnerable to life's situations at times.
    But I choose to take care of myself! ...and in part, that means I choose to share the cares and concerns with my people.

    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • Wishing you well and comfort on this beautiful Sunday. How did I get there: be happy and do not give the issue another consideration. Now I will be super careful myself as I scroll thru spine land on my iPad. I would hate it if I ever hit that button on accident. I can feel your hurt...I would feel the same way. But I also know each and everyone of you would do what I'm doing now: hug hug hug you. You have helped me along my journey, depend on us to help you. I know what it is like to find out in real life what real friends are in my life and not. I actually am appreciative of my back for that gift..it makes my relationships more valuable to me. But not here. In spine land, we have your back (puny!) . Take a breath and let it roll off your shoulders, trust me.
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