Welcome, Friend!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Veritas-Health LLC has recently released patient forums to our Arthritis-Health web site.

Please visit http://www.arthritis-health.com/forum

There are several patient story videos on Spine-Health that talk about Arthritis. Search on Patient stories
Protect anonymity
We strongly suggest that members do not include their email addresses. Once that is published , your email address is available to anyone on the internet , including hackers.

All discussions and comments that contain an external URL will be automatically moved to the spam queue. No external URL pointing to a medical web site is permitted. Forum rules also indicate that you need prior moderator approval. If you are going to post an external URL, contact one of the moderators to get their approval.
Attention New Members
Your initial discussion or comment automatically is sent to a moderator's approval queue before it can be published.
There are no medical professionals on this forum side of the site. Therefore, no one is capable or permitted to provide any type of medical advice.
This includes any analysis, interpretation, or advice based on any diagnostic test

Counting my blessings..

AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,671
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:19 AM in Matters of the Heart
The past two days have been extreme with pain. Due to my own doing. I have the "think I can attitude and no one can tell me different". So I overdid myself. Pretended I didn't have limits. Pretended I didn't have pain. Well pain showed it's ugly self and I had to use a cane yesterday. I sat and cried. Thinking of all I want to do and can't. I became really down. My kids noticed and reacted to it. They went on their best behavior. One of my boys even learned how to run the washer. Then I remembered.... I forgot to count!

I learned in December that I have to look for the positives in life, because sometimes those postives don't just fall in my lap.

Last November our daughter was murdered by an ex-boyfriend. I crawled in a hole. I wanted to be in the hole next to her. For not only was she my daughter, but she was my best friend. December rolled around and I woke up one day. I had to crawl out of this hole. I had to for my children. I needed to be there for them. They needed me. So I started looking for the positives in life. Then it struck me, the years we had with our daughter was a blessing in itself, for some loose their children at birth. I know my pain--but can't imagine theirs. We have incredible memories and she will always be with us.

The week before Christmas I lost my job. Having always been employed, this was a new way of life for me. I now didn't have to make the decision to take time off from work for my hubby's up-coming hip operation in January. Instead I took that blessing and learned how to conserve money. I spent much more time with my kids--good quailty time. Healing time together.

Now I sit here thinking about the blessings over the past couple of days. To see nine kids taking care of things in the house. To see how my son learned to use the washer. To know I can see and hear my children. That my children can work together as a team. To see my youngest son pick a cucumber from the garden--his very first one. Only because I couldn't bend over to pick it myself. To see the excitement in his face.. To enjoy their smiles--because I wasn't "too busy" doing something.

Sometimes I have to look for those blessings. But you know what? They are always there.

take care,



  • To dwell in darkness at times, and so hard to find the light. The light is always there, in every situation. I am so glad for you that you choose to seek it out.

    One Love,

  • :) hi! what a thrill it must be to realize that many of the lessons you are teaching your children are actually getting through. they are there for you as you are for them. what a basis for a wonderful family and what terrific adults you are creating. so sorry you overdid but it is easy to do in our quest to be "normal!" take good care of yourself and don't beat yourself up over it! just don't do it again! lol! look around you and know that the lord may not have blessed you with good health but when it comes to love he gave you bushels. Jenny :)
  • Thank you for that reminder to remember to count our blessings. We seem to have a lot in common, or at least half-way in common. I have 5 kids and my name is Cindy. I can't imagine how you are sane after having 10!

    When I get down, I sometimes sing a hymn titled Count Your Blessings. The big things can be so overwhelming, that it is difficult to stop and look at the little things.

    I have been feeling pretty low for the past week. It seems that medically I am falling apart and I am frustrated and just tired of it all. It isn't just spine issues, but it seems like everything is going wrong. But this morning, after reading your post, I have been brought back to reality that on the whole realm of things, my health is only a small part of my life. For today, you have given me the desire to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

    I'm sorry about your daughter, but it sounds like you have found a way to deal with your pain, and your attitude is great!

    Surviving chronic pain one day at a time, praying for a reprieve because living another 40 years like this doesn't sound too fun!
  • It can be hard when we are overwhelmed with the bad to stop and remember the good...I think the pain has a tendency to drag us down even more and there are so many articles on how chronic pain affects the brain! With all that has gone on, it's amazing how you've taken the time to not let it beat you and stop to count the things that are good in your life. I'm sure it gets hard sometimes, and that may be a gross understatement, but it's admirable that you've taken the time to see the good. You're in my prayers!
  • I have 5 young children and they keep me grounded daily. I thank God daily for their health and mine. Even with the problems I have had with my spine there are so many people so much worse off than I have ever been.

    My kids give me daily motivation to keep moving when in pain. Seeing them together and helping each other is the most heartwarming thing for a mother.

    Mom of 10- I am so sorry about your daughter. That is a tragic loss. I am inspired by your strength to keep going.
    Yes, count the blessings, daily.
  • And I thank you for posting this. I can't imagine what you have been through and are still going through every day. I hear time and time again that peoples children are what gets them through each day. I desperately wish I had children myself, I've wanted a baby since I was 19 years old. With my back how it is I may never get that chance, but that small possibility that it might still happen for me one day can help to keep me going. Children are such amazing gifts. And yours are very lucky to have you as their Mum.

    Take care and hang in there. Life is really tough but it's great that you can find the blessings you have in yours :)
  • Cindy, thanks for sharing your story and feelings, and please accept my condolences in the loss of your daughter; I commend you for getting out of "that dark place" and working your way back up to your family. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been, and I'm sure you know there will be lots of bumps ahead. You have succeeded in helping your kids on their way to independence....at least now they can do their laundry! ;)

    I don't know if you've see the video of "The Secret" (I loved most of it, but some of it was a little "hokey"....); one of the ideas I loved was carrying around a "gratitude stone". Every time the guy put his hand in his pocket, he felt the stone and made himself think of something in his life he was grateful for. I had a special stone that was given to me once by a friend, and I did that for a while (til I lost the stone!!). I have been feeling better for the past two weeks as well, so it's made me stay out of my head a little more and allowed me to SEE how lucky I am for the amazing things in my life. My kids are grown and have all moved away, but I still live for them.

    Take care, and thanks again for sharing. Feel free to PM if you just need a shoulder.


    "The love of a mother for her child is woven with a thread so strong, it is indestructible." Author unknown

  • Cindy,
    That is beyond comprehension, and I admire your tenacity to continue, you are an inspiration to us all in adapting, that positive outlook is hard to develop and will prove beneficial in the future even after your tragic loss, after seven years and the all clear my beloved and ever friend, my sister died from breast cancer, she was the epitome of grace and endured her trial with some poignancy and steely determination, her real bucket list was cut short by time and even with the knowledge of her passing she supported her family to her last dignified breath, do not be sad for her, the pain has stopped and she has taught me an invaluable lesson in how to live every day to its fullest and I miss her. Her infectious spice for life will live on in me and my children and ever grateful for the gifts her short life shared with us.

    My thoughts Cindy are with you and your loss from this unspeakable act, our pain brings with it unseen elements that are in vision and your description of those important times is one you have worked hard to develop, I teach young children and many of the things you describe are missed in the pace of life itself, those children are lucky to have you and we applaud your achievement.


Sign In or Register to comment.