We've had a LOT of problems with that of late down here in South Florida. One group tried to burn a kid to death about 7 months ago, another (dead) stabbed etc. Nasty! I remember when I was in school. "I'm gonna kill you after school" meant "Gonna kick your butt!" Sad....
Brenda
_____________
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy 10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused. For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name! "Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
I was put on the "bully" side for some reason and called ridiculous and nasty.
How about this novel idea? Let the mods handle the bullys and just give whatever feedback you have to the person in question, without your random commentary on other people on the board?
This post was NOT made to bring up crap from other post on the forum. IF you feel you have been mistreated go to mods. Why bring it up here?
I am just making a statement reguarding the upcoming Bully Awareness Week. This is NOT just a random commentary on other people on the board.
This post was NOT made to bring up crap from other post on the forum. IF you feel you have been mistreated go to mods. Why bring it up here?
I am just making a statement reguarding the upcoming Bully Awareness Week. This is NOT just a random commentary on other people on the board.
Sorry you missed my point.
My point has nothing to do with feeling mistreated and everything to do with not using the word "bully" lightly, and that many here (and you did mention "on the internet") could learn something about using group dynamics to belittle others.
_____________
11/2007- equestrian accident. Fractured L2, 90% loss of height, retropulsion, bone fragments. Moderate-severe chronic pain treated with epidurals, facet ablation, medication.
12/15/2010- L2 corpectomy and L1-L3 fusion via thoracotomy. Posterior plates installed next day. Total surgery time 9 hours!
This board needs a good dose of it, it has been a nightmare lately.
_____________
11/2007- equestrian accident. Fractured L2, 90% loss of height, retropulsion, bone fragments. Moderate-severe chronic pain treated with epidurals, facet ablation, medication.
12/15/2010- L2 corpectomy and L1-L3 fusion via thoracotomy. Posterior plates installed next day. Total surgery time 9 hours!
And I am proud of you Kelly, with remembrance day around the corner I hope you hear more of how ppl are proud of you, and Thank You for your service ! !
What is so scary now a days with "bullying" is that it use to be once you were home, you were clear and safe. Now these guys are in their cell phones, their internet etc. I don't have kids, but when I hear on the news of some kid committing suicide due to being harassed on all fronts, so sad.
Brenda
_____________
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy 10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused. For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name! "Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
Adults, nodding. Bullying in the work place. Almost forgot about that! Before I retired we had one "Bully" supervisor. He tried that crap with me, but I was senior (same grade though), and I put him in his "equal" place in front of everyone. He never tried that crap with me again, but man-o-man did he get on certain subordinates!
What I remember as a kid about bullies? Many times their parents are just as bad! Or you get the total opposite where they are the bullied one at home, and at school they take it out on other kids!
Brenda
_____________
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy 10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused. For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name! "Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
We grew up in farm country. Our elementary school was a country school, with a total of maybe 100 students, on a good year, from kindergarten to Gr 8. The one bully I had, lived on the farm around the corner from us, and is now my brother-in-law! ROFL But seriously, he wasn't that bad, pushed me and my best friend around a little, would trip us, and tore the heads off our barbie dolls, and always told us to f off. Well, one day, my sister and the boy who lived right beside us were teasing me, so I told the neighbour boy to "f off" as I had been told the day before by my now BIL. I had no idea what it meant, I was only about 8, and they were about 11. Anyways, that night at the dinner table my sister told on me, I got in trouble, she didn't for teasing me in the first place, and our neighbour didn't come back to our house again til he and my sister were seniors in high school, and his parents were away so my mom invited him! lol... Anyways, I'm pretty sure my BIL feels badly about the way he treated us back then, as the story inevitably comes up when our two families get together (our parents still live there, and my sister bought the house on the corner in between them!) and he always looks embarrassed and a little ashamed. Maybe having kids of his own now has helped with that.
Sadly, some adults don't learn that lesson when they have kids, and you're right, the bullying just continues on at home for them.
_____________
Kelly I am aPROUD CANADIANsoldierButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
Our resident *cough* bully was Pete. At that time I was in junior high, but the 6th grade. At our bus stop most of us were either in grade 6 or 7 as were most on our route. Pete was the "big" kid in the 8th grade.
He thrilled for knocking kids books to the ground, running off with some of the stuff he wanted (lunch or a new little toy). I don't think anyone liked this kid, and most of us were scared of him. One day he got me in his sites and kept behind me and kept poking me and being verbally rude. When we got to my bus stop he got off and almost pushed me down the stairs. His bus stop was the next one btw. He started pushing me from behind again and something snapped. I turned around and started screaming at him, then I just started wailing on him until he was on the ground!
He was a good 5 inches taller than me, and maybe 25 pounds? When I backed away to look at him crying on the ground, all the other kids cheered! He never bothered anyone on that bus again, nor did he ever go to anyone else's bus stop to torment others. I got home and I shook all over, as I never knew I had it in me. From that day forward I realized that most bullies are bullies because *we* let them have that power. I wonder what course Pete's life took? Hummm...
Kelly, since you know your "Pete", is he any different now as an adult compared to his bully days?
Brenda
_____________
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy 10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused. For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name! "Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
Oh yes, he changed. It's funny, because he was the biggest in our school, too, the proverbial "big strappin' farm lad", lol. I think high school sorted him out, though, he wasn't the biggest anymore.
_____________
Kelly I am aPROUD CANADIANsoldierButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
Oh yes, he changed. It's funny, because he was the biggest in our school, too, the proverbial "big strappin' farm lad", lol. I think high school sorted him out, though, he wasn't the biggest anymore.
Kelly,
Either he matured in High School (which I hope is the case), or another bully showed him he wasn't the biggest and baddest anymore! *wink* I do think of Pete every once in a while. (G)
Like Eve said, part of the problem in the schools is the teachers *still* don't try and stop it. We have had a rash of really over the top bully behavior down here, and too *cough* in "Bully free" schools. Sad. It also seems that some of those bullies are the very same "hoodlum" types that cause all manner of illegal mayhem of late! They also sometimes get a "pack" mentality.
Brenda
_____________
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy 10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused. For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name! "Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
Bullying has been going on for so long, in so many places, even parents to children, I have seen it in the way they talk down to them, and when a time of self esteem is so important.
Hearing of kids killing themsleves because they have been bullyed so much, and school, have a no bully rule, but hardly follow it, making excuses, grrrr,
Hopefully Bully Awareness will be a big time thing, and people will be made aware, and accountable.
Kelly, your BIL, too funny,you are so full of great strories, and alway make me smile, or laugh
I have been here at SH since around 2006 and have seen people disagree and there was never a need for a Novel to be written. That comment alone is a bit rude in itself. This is not about just 1 person, or 1 thread and 1 view. We are all adults and some people hit it off with others while others do not. It does not make it bad or good, it just is, it is life.
You say you have been a victim of bullying so i would think that you understand the pain and isolation that comes with others behavior.
Chronic pain is hard and living with chronic pain 24/7 has it's own challenges. We all do the best we can. So perhaps a short story would be better, or a slogan , ones i try and live by.
We are here to see each other through, not see through each other.
And if you have nothing to say or contribute, pass, and say nothing
There is nothing worse then making others or an individual feel worse so you/ or others can feel better or justified.
Life is short. To tell a member that they have to many different issues for this forum to support is a short cut on just plain human kindness.
just my 2 cents
Cindy thanks for looking into all these threads, but where are all the other mods.
let's get back to supporting each other, not tearing each other apart
And if you have nothing to say or contribute, pass, and say nothing
There is nothing worse then making others or an individual feel worse so you/ or others can feel better or justified.
I agree completely. I was simply adding the fact that two wrongs do not make a right, but Tamtam said it for me in her post under "announcements."
I don't think you'll find that I was "tearing anybody down." But thank you for showing people what I was talking about.
_____________
11/2007- equestrian accident. Fractured L2, 90% loss of height, retropulsion, bone fragments. Moderate-severe chronic pain treated with epidurals, facet ablation, medication.
12/15/2010- L2 corpectomy and L1-L3 fusion via thoracotomy. Posterior plates installed next day. Total surgery time 9 hours!
Click on my user name to see my medical history
You get what you get......not what you deserve! I stole that from Susan (RIP)
Today is yours to embrace....for tomorrow who knows what will be starring you in the face
your wasting you time .i tried to calm thing down and all it got me is in a load of trouble .don't rise to it .i have feel i have wasted time and energy tying to calm the waters but if your face doesn't fit there are always going to be bullies where every you go /be that at work or school and even on a forum .please dint rise to it it wont do you any good when i suggested leaving it to the mods i was deemed a bad person i cant believe what i am reading if this in not enough proof that some people can turn i dont know what is something is screaming constructive dismissal of whatever the forum equivalent it
tx
_____________
2010 just had a discography and now waiting for an ALIF open fusion {360 degree}
I guess I have been away for awhile as I certainly missed something. But we are here to help one another through the rough times. At least that is why I joined. To help and be helped. Is everyone going to agree, of course not we are all adults and entitled to our own opinions. When we post a question we must be prepared for an answer. If it is constructive criticsm than so be it. I don't feel that is being a bully. Many have been on here for so long or have been through so much more than I. I look to them for their wisdom.
My dad taught me a lesson in life I will always remember. Simply follow the Golden Rule" Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Now you must admit you can't go wrong with that one.
Jan
As we go from school to school and organization to organization educating and setting up programs to stop #bullying, the question continues to arise, ” . . . but why do we need laws to address the issue?”. Comments come up such as “We didn’t have laws when we were kids and we survived”. Then I sit with children (as their therapist) who attend schools who are exempt from the law who tell me “I was afraid to tell my teacher . . . .” about #bullying for fear of repercussions. Children and adolescents fear the consequences from the adults and from the other students. Exemption allows these schools to continue to turn a blind eye. Do we NEED the laws? Perhaps yes, perhaps no. Do they help us advocate for children . . . YES! Let’s stop fighting about the law and focus on the kids it was written for. It is a different time now. . .
agree +
Kelly
I am a PROUD CANADIAN soldier But NOT a doctor, my thoughts are my own
Jim
We've had a LOT of problems with that of late down here in South Florida. One group tried to burn a kid to death about 7 months ago, another (dead) stabbed etc. Nasty! I remember when I was in school. "I'm gonna kill you after school" meant "Gonna kick your butt!" Sad....
Brenda
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy
10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused.
For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name!
"Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
This post was NOT made to bring up crap from other post on the forum. IF you feel you have been mistreated go to mods. Why bring it up here?
I am just making a statement reguarding the upcoming Bully Awareness Week. This is NOT just a random commentary on other people on the board.
Peace
Sorry you missed my point.
My point has nothing to do with feeling mistreated and everything to do with not using the word "bully" lightly, and that many here (and you did mention "on the internet") could learn something about using group dynamics to belittle others.
11/2007- equestrian accident. Fractured L2, 90% loss of height, retropulsion, bone fragments. Moderate-severe chronic pain treated with epidurals, facet ablation, medication.
12/15/2010- L2 corpectomy and L1-L3 fusion via thoracotomy. Posterior plates installed next day. Total surgery time 9 hours!
Nov 14 - 20 is Bullying Awareness Week.
Kelly
I am a PROUD CANADIAN soldier But NOT a doctor, my thoughts are my own
This board needs a good dose of it, it has been a nightmare lately.
11/2007- equestrian accident. Fractured L2, 90% loss of height, retropulsion, bone fragments. Moderate-severe chronic pain treated with epidurals, facet ablation, medication.
12/15/2010- L2 corpectomy and L1-L3 fusion via thoracotomy. Posterior plates installed next day. Total surgery time 9 hours!
And I am proud of you Kelly, with remembrance day around the corner I hope you hear more of how ppl are proud of you, and Thank You for your service ! !
Eve,
What is so scary now a days with "bullying" is that it use to be once you were home, you were clear and safe. Now these guys are in their cell phones, their internet etc. I don't have kids, but when I hear on the news of some kid committing suicide due to being harassed on all fronts, so sad.
Brenda
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy
10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused.
For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name!
"Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
Eve, you know you don't need to do that! But thank you, from myself and all others who serve for the acknowledgment.
You're right Brenda, it is so scary, there's no haven anymore for kids, or adults for that matter!
Kelly
I am a PROUD CANADIAN soldier But NOT a doctor, my thoughts are my own
Adults, nodding. Bullying in the work place. Almost forgot about that! Before I retired we had one "Bully" supervisor. He tried that crap with me, but I was senior (same grade though), and I put him in his "equal" place in front of everyone. He never tried that crap with me again, but man-o-man did he get on certain subordinates!
What I remember as a kid about bullies? Many times their parents are just as bad! Or you get the total opposite where they are the bullied one at home, and at school they take it out on other kids!
Brenda
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy
10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused.
For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name!
"Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
We grew up in farm country. Our elementary school was a country school, with a total of maybe 100 students, on a good year, from kindergarten to Gr 8. The one bully I had, lived on the farm around the corner from us, and is now my brother-in-law! ROFL But seriously, he wasn't that bad, pushed me and my best friend around a little, would trip us, and tore the heads off our barbie dolls, and always told us to f off. Well, one day, my sister and the boy who lived right beside us were teasing me, so I told the neighbour boy to "f off" as I had been told the day before by my now BIL. I had no idea what it meant, I was only about 8, and they were about 11. Anyways, that night at the dinner table my sister told on me, I got in trouble, she didn't for teasing me in the first place, and our neighbour didn't come back to our house again til he and my sister were seniors in high school, and his parents were away so my mom invited him! lol... Anyways, I'm pretty sure my BIL feels badly about the way he treated us back then, as the story inevitably comes up when our two families get together (our parents still live there, and my sister bought the house on the corner in between them!) and he always looks embarrassed and a little ashamed. Maybe having kids of his own now has helped with that.
Sadly, some adults don't learn that lesson when they have kids, and you're right, the bullying just continues on at home for them.
Kelly
I am a PROUD CANADIAN soldier But NOT a doctor, my thoughts are my own
Kelly,
Our resident *cough* bully was Pete. At that time I was in junior high, but the 6th grade. At our bus stop most of us were either in grade 6 or 7 as were most on our route. Pete was the "big" kid in the 8th grade.
He thrilled for knocking kids books to the ground, running off with some of the stuff he wanted (lunch or a new little toy). I don't think anyone liked this kid, and most of us were scared of him. One day he got me in his sites and kept behind me and kept poking me and being verbally rude. When we got to my bus stop he got off and almost pushed me down the stairs. His bus stop was the next one btw. He started pushing me from behind again and something snapped. I turned around and started screaming at him, then I just started wailing on him until he was on the ground!
He was a good 5 inches taller than me, and maybe 25 pounds? When I backed away to look at him crying on the ground, all the other kids cheered! He never bothered anyone on that bus again, nor did he ever go to anyone else's bus stop to torment others. I got home and I shook all over, as I never knew I had it in me. From that day forward I realized that most bullies are bullies because *we* let them have that power. I wonder what course Pete's life took? Hummm...
Kelly, since you know your "Pete", is he any different now as an adult compared to his bully days?
Brenda
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy
10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused.
For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name!
"Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
Oh yes, he changed. It's funny, because he was the biggest in our school, too, the proverbial "big strappin' farm lad", lol. I think high school sorted him out, though, he wasn't the biggest anymore.
Kelly
I am a PROUD CANADIAN soldier But NOT a doctor, my thoughts are my own
Kelly,
Either he matured in High School (which I hope is the case), or another bully showed him he wasn't the biggest and baddest anymore! *wink* I do think of Pete every once in a while. (G)
Like Eve said, part of the problem in the schools is the teachers *still* don't try and stop it. We have had a rash of really over the top bully behavior down here, and too *cough* in "Bully free" schools. Sad. It also seems that some of those bullies are the very same "hoodlum" types that cause all manner of illegal mayhem of late! They also sometimes get a "pack" mentality.
Brenda
ACDF C5/6 2/08 - C6/7 8/09 - Neuropathy right arm and both legs - Cervical Myelopathy
10-11-11 PCF C4-T2 - C4-C7 Lamies; Surgery #2 Emergent removal large Hematoma!
L2/3/4 & L5/S1 fusions and Laminectomy on hold till neck fused.
For the full "Cliff Notes" please click my name!
"Life can knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to get up!!"
Bullying has been going on for so long, in so many places, even parents to children, I have seen it in the way they talk down to them, and when a time of self esteem is so important.
Hearing of kids killing themsleves because they have been bullyed so much, and school, have a no bully rule, but hardly follow it, making excuses, grrrr,
Hopefully Bully Awareness will be a big time thing, and people will be made aware, and accountable.
Kelly, your BIL, too funny,you are so full of great strories, and alway make me smile, or laugh
I have been here at SH since around 2006 and have seen people disagree and there was never a need for a Novel to be written. That comment alone is a bit rude in itself. This is not about just 1 person, or 1 thread and 1 view. We are all adults and some people hit it off with others while others do not. It does not make it bad or good, it just is, it is life.
You say you have been a victim of bullying so i would think that you understand the pain and isolation that comes with others behavior.
Chronic pain is hard and living with chronic pain 24/7 has it's own challenges. We all do the best we can. So perhaps a short story would be better, or a slogan , ones i try and live by.
We are here to see each other through, not see through each other.
And if you have nothing to say or contribute, pass, and say nothing
There is nothing worse then making others or an individual feel worse so you/ or others can feel better or justified.
Life is short. To tell a member that they have to many different issues for this forum to support is a short cut on just plain human kindness.
just my 2 cents
Cindy thanks for looking into all these threads, but where are all the other mods.
let's get back to supporting each other, not tearing each other apart
j
So true, I love that line "we are here to see each other through, not see through each other". Well said.
Kelly
I am a PROUD CANADIAN soldier But NOT a doctor, my thoughts are my own
I agree completely. I was simply adding the fact that two wrongs do not make a right, but Tamtam said it for me in her post under "announcements."
I don't think you'll find that I was "tearing anybody down." But thank you for showing people what I was talking about.
11/2007- equestrian accident. Fractured L2, 90% loss of height, retropulsion, bone fragments. Moderate-severe chronic pain treated with epidurals, facet ablation, medication.
12/15/2010- L2 corpectomy and L1-L3 fusion via thoracotomy. Posterior plates installed next day. Total surgery time 9 hours!
I agree!
Jim
Click on my user name to see my medical history
You get what you get......not what you deserve! I stole that from Susan (RIP)
Today is yours to embrace....for tomorrow who knows what will be starring you in the face
your wasting you time .i tried to calm thing down and all it got me is in a load of trouble .don't rise to it .i have feel i have wasted time and energy tying to calm the waters but if your face doesn't fit there are always going to be bullies where every you go /be that at work or school and even on a forum .please dint rise to it it wont do you any good when i suggested leaving it to the mods i was deemed a bad person i cant believe what i am reading if this in not enough proof that some people can turn i dont know what is something is screaming constructive dismissal of whatever the forum equivalent it
tx
2010 just had a discography and now waiting for an ALIF open fusion {360 degree}
I guess I have been away for awhile as I certainly missed something. But we are here to help one another through the rough times. At least that is why I joined. To help and be helped. Is everyone going to agree, of course not we are all adults and entitled to our own opinions. When we post a question we must be prepared for an answer. If it is constructive criticsm than so be it. I don't feel that is being a bully. Many have been on here for so long or have been through so much more than I. I look to them for their wisdom.
My dad taught me a lesson in life I will always remember. Simply follow the Golden Rule" Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Now you must admit you can't go wrong with that one.
Jan
Jan
Dad's are the best. I miss mine so much, It has been 5 years now.
Thanks and wise man.
j
As we go from school to school and organization to organization educating and setting up programs to stop #bullying, the question continues to arise, ” . . . but why do we need laws to address the issue?”. Comments come up such as “We didn’t have laws when we were kids and we survived”. Then I sit with children (as their therapist) who attend schools who are exempt from the law who tell me “I was afraid to tell my teacher . . . .” about #bullying for fear of repercussions. Children and adolescents fear the consequences from the adults and from the other students. Exemption allows these schools to continue to turn a blind eye. Do we NEED the laws? Perhaps yes, perhaps no. Do they help us advocate for children . . . YES! Let’s stop fighting about the law and focus on the kids it was written for. It is a different time now. . .