Hi all, havnt been back on this forum since joined up las year, have had lot on my plate. Being treated for depression aswell as my back problems. Was in hospital awaiting spinal morphine pump implant but after waiting some hours was told had to be cancelled due to short theatre staff. Have to ring dr rooms in morning to get another surgery date hopefully only wk or two at latest, dont no how much more i can take from the back and leg pain, feel like taking my life at moment, have had suicidal thoughts for sometime now, just dont if i can keep going. Sorry for the post its just cant get my feelings out all the time and texting is easier for me as too hard to talk to people face to face, i can to my drs but family or others is hard to share my feelings. Hopefully tomoro will be good news regarding surgery for pump otherwise dont no how i will deal with it, im trying my best but near as much as can take.. thanks, tazz, in Oz