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Helpful Hints For The Airlines

AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,578
edited 06/11/2012 - 7:23 AM in Lighten and Brighten
Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.

Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell -- the attendants have gotten old and haggard-looking. They don‘t even serve food anymore, so what‘s the loss?

The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a "party atmosphere" going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn‘t need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and "special services."

Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues. This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

Why didn‘t Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself?
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Comments

  • I don't think there'll be anyone on the flights but men.. (|: ..Women and children will have to take private jets... ya know..champagne, filet mingon, chocolate covered stawberries, plenty of pillows and blankets..aahh.. now that sounds nice.. 8> jade
  • Wasn't Hooters Air kind of like that?

    Sure, the women weren't strippers, but they were still wearing next to nothing. And I don't know about those "special services" but I'm sure it must have happened sometime on one of those flights.

    Annnnyway....

    I think it was only in business for three short years before it tanked. :B
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  • if Clinton were still in office...

    ...and Jade, don't forget the foot massages given by the Clive Owen look-alikes...I'd be in for sure!! <:P <br />
  • yes, froggyrn--foot massages..aaahhh..good idea..
    Hooter's Airline--The guys were there only for the food, right? :$ jade
  • just like they subscribe to Playboy and Hustler for the great articles...L
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