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AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,578
edited 06/11/2012 - 7:26 AM in Matters of the Heart

I am so glad that my suicide attempt in october was treated ( thanks to my friend i forgot i had invited over
who stayed with me for 48hours till i
became conscious again)
and i wasn't responcible for causing my friends and family grief. Its hard to remember to appreciate life and the deal dealt. Since then even though physically i have been ill i have felt much more positive about life.
Its a shame that most people are not very understanding or empathetic towards those in pain or distress or depressed unless they have experienced it themselves.. and even then... Our culture "stiff upper lip" prevents people from reaching out to each other.
Peopletell me i'm useless, worthless , a waste of space and time ( or at least reading between the lines they do)Its hard to remember that i'm not. Its frustrating not being able to be who i wld like all the time but the least i can do is try and do all those things i intended.

i have a new supportive gp and hoping to get some answers from the tests the neurologist has done. I've been diagnosed with myesthenia gravis and CPS but sceptical since it doesn't explain it all so will seek another opinion this january.At least MG is treatable. Its given me a fresh perspective and i plan to quit wasting time and get on with all i had planned to do, so i am moving house to be closer to the universities i want to go to and will be compelteing the alevels i need this spet.
i am amazed how resilient my body is and that i haven't done any lasting damage.
At the mo.i amquite well and able to get around ok. The pain which was dogging me every morning has died down and been replaced with different paininstead. However i don't care because its not going to stop me from trying to live my life as best i canand at least the painkillers are working



  • to know that you are okay and that your attitude seems to be a positive one. You sound like you are headed in the right direction my friend...if I can help at all then you know that I am just a PM away. Keep up with the positive attitude and reach out when you need to..there will be those of us that are there to help you if you let us....take care....Miki
  • :) good for you Martha. <:P it is going to be a great New Year for you! your SH family never left you, you just went away at times. >:D< so glad you are back and sound happy!! :D Jenny :)
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  • Marthara.....glad to hear that you are OK and feeling positive about things. Take care and Happy New Year to you.
    Keep positive!


    ...an old timer here and ex-moderator

  • Glad to hear you are doing better. Please be sure to post here when things start heading south!!! You know that you are loved at SH and we all want to help you when you need it. God bless and keep you in His hands!
  • :H and congratulation on the willingness to make these life changing decisions. It's hard when we are in pain to reach out but I'm glad that you did with your friend. Please continue to post and let us know how you are doing.
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  • Thank you for sharing your story with us, it's a very difficult subject to talk about and I'm so glad you were able to overcome those feelings. All we can do is take life on step at a time and always remember tomorrow's a brand new day. Keep up the good work, and we are here for you whenever you need us. Take care >:D<
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