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Hi fellow back pain suferers I am a newbie

rdcomarrdcoma Posts: 6
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:48 AM in New Member Introductions
Thought I would try something new and talk to other chronic back pain people like me. I am coming up on my 15 year anniversary of the accident that changed my life forever. On me 40th birthday I thought I would have some fun so I went snowmobiling with 3 good friends. We were having a great day on the marked trails until noon time when we decided to get some lunch. We crossed the main road and went down an unmarked trail to the pizza shop. I was last in line because I was a novice when we came to a large bowl in the trail. I sped up the bowl hitting about 40 mph and thought I would fly down the oncoming hill when I came to the top of the hill I realized that the trail cut sharply to the right and rode a ridge. By this time I could not change my course of direction and I drove off a 40 foot cliff and landed on a huge downed pine tree which I rode on my back with the machine on top of me until I hit the trees exposed stump.I FLEW ABOUT 25 FEET FROM THE IMPACT SPOT AND I KNEW I HAD DONE EXTENSIVE DAMAGE TO MY BODY I COULD NOT MOVE. The emts and rangers along with about 25 spectators gathered and pulled me up the cliff on a gurney board. To make a long story short I had broke all my ribs on my right side along with 20 small bones that run up my spine and I had moved L5 about 2 inches. I had to have spinal fusion surgery on L3 L4 AND L5 with titanium rods and 6 pedicle screws or my s1 nerve would have severed causing me to lose the ability to pee shit or get a erection. I have been in chronic pain for 14 years and have gone through many procedures at 3 different pain clinics. Just writing this stupid blog is causing me extensive back pain and I have to stop writing. I am sure this horror story is lame compared to others but my life sucks and I hate my back pain. I am at the end of my rope.


  • rdcoma

    I read your story...a sad one like most of us. None of us deserve the burden of chronic pain and suffering....I can not change your situation but my heart is open to listen...my life like your was changed in a rolled over auto accident ( well in my case I already had DDD ..but the crash made things totally messed up different)
    Please just allow your self the right to be sad, to cry when you need it but to reach out TOO cause even though it may feels like it...youre not alone..- hopefully this forum will help you as it is starting for me heal the spirit which is truly a part of this journey
  • Hi rd.
    It is good to see you here. Your story is certainly not lame--my goodness, it is horrifying.
    It only takes a split second to change our lives completely.
    It is so hard to live with chronic pain. After two years, I am still unable to believe or accept it. I know that somewhere, somehow, I will find a way to change this.
    Being new here, I am still trying to read and absorb all of the information here. I came here to learn, and to find others who really understand what you are going through. You can try to explain how you feel until you are blue in the face, but unless someone has "been there," it is hard for them to really understand.
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  • Welcome to Spine Health. It is very cool to have this avenue to communicate and commiserate with other chronic pain individuals. A life altering event is something that happens to all of us at some point in our lives. Sorry that yours was such an incredibly terrifying ordeal. I have to admit though that I could picture myself on your snowmobile as you described it. I have had a few good wipe outs in my younger years on skis, motorcycles, horses and personal water craft. I know the feeling of control being lost and flying through the air unable to stop the impending impact. Wow! You just gave me an incredible trip down memory lane. It has been quite a while since I have felt the reality of those memories!

    What I have found though is that there is a way to find life once again. What it is, is different for each of us, but in some respects very attainable. The key is having the desire to move ahead regardless of the pain. We have to live with it anyway, so may as well do what we can to enjoy as much of life as possible. I've been told that I am an incredibly adaptable person. I found a way to become that kind of a person in order to have a life despite chronic pain. I hope that one day you can find the same for yourself!

    Once again, welcome to the Spine Health community.

  • Welcome to Spine-Health. This forum is a great place to find others that understand what you're going through. The members here are very knowledgeable, friendly and supportive and sometimes that's the most important thing we need (in addition to our docs and meds, of course).

    But having others to talk to, to ask questions and even to support can be very cathartic.

    I was in a horrible car accident 30 years ago and only started on my spiney journey when it came to a head in 2008 when my spine apparently had enough with what I was doing and started to collapse, especially my cervical area. I think many of us know where it all began, and sometimes our issues don't start until years later.

    I'm very sorry that you've been in such pain for so long and hope that you are getting or will be able to get further help to get you to a reasonable level of pain management.

    Take care and I'm glad you found us. I hope we can help you, at least on the emotional and psychological side of your spiney journey.

  • Thank you for your replies, I know that I am not alone in this world of pain.
    I am having an extremely difficult time trying to adapt, my mind still thinks that I can do all the things I use to do. My depression level is off the charts I feel like the end of the world is right around the corner. I hope I can get some help form everyone because this is my last go round. Winter time is the worst time of the year for me it brings everything back the pain the emptiness and the loneliness is unbearable. Sorry to sound like such a downer but that is where I am at.
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  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,362
    Welcome to Spine-health.

    Whew! What a ride! Yep, I guess you've got a pretty good reason to be down.

    Seriously though, you've come to a good place for support, advice, and friendship. I agree with you that wintertime is much worse for depression. For me being outside in the warm sunshine makes things seem not so bad. I guess it gets our mind off of things somewhat.

    I hope you can find some comfort here.
  • Depression is a hard thing for both us and the people around us, my poor husband must think I am totally off my rocker. I cry at the stupidist things he says or does and I used to be a tough lady. Its a very rocky road to go down, its horrifying, our lives have been changed so much and we had no control over it. I am a person that had control and I lost it so we all understand and feel for you and anyone around you. We are here for you and even though I am a newbie also I have learned that these people are the most caring people you will meet. Take care and best of luck to you.
    annette m ichenberg
  • Howdy rdcoma,

    Lame? Nope, not even close. Like was said, our lives can and does change in an instant. For me, I was on my day off, and agreed to come in and give a guy his flight test to become a helicopter instructor. Needless to say, we had an engine failure at a very bad juncture in a "simulated" emergency engine failure and we crashed! That was in 1985. I had 8 months of therapy and adjustments to straighten my spine back out, and then regular chiropractor (disks were deemed fine then) manipulations due to constant misalignment of my spine. My disks started failing in 2002, and chiropractor treatments stopped, and the intervention (surgeries) began.

    Depression happens to a lot of us, as the pain is constant, limiting, and so painful! Have you spoken with your doctor, or better yet a psychiatrist that understand chronic pain sufferers yet? I went for a consult with a psychiatrist a while back to see for myself if I was just bummed, or depression was setting in. I was deemed "bummed" out, and she offered me some ways to reduce it. There are also anti-depressant drugs out there that might help. Just know that we are here to support when needed. :)

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • hi and welcome to the forum! :H we are here to offer you support and answer what questions we can. it is such a wonderful feeling to come on line here and find a whole new way of living.. friends, informaition, chat, the list goes on and on.... you have come to a great place and especially feeling as you do... so cheer up and join us.. have a good look around, make yourself at home!! good luck! Jenny :)
  • Wow, you people really open up. I have been in a funk but your stories and support could not have come at a better time. My birthday and anniversary of my accident is coming up and it all seems to be coming to a head if you know what I mean. I also have other medical issues, don't we all that is why I have not responded until now. I guess I gotta get off my butt easier said than done but if I don't I am going to fade away. I am so depressed and lonely that it is unbearable at times. The pain level increases with the depression so I am going to start therapy again. I will keep you guys updated on my situatuin and I also feel for everyone of you because I know the personal hell that you have gone through or are going through. Thanks again you guys do rock.
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