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l4-l5-s1 surgery

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Comments

  • Yes it does start getting better just when you are about to get up. I was always trying to do too much but you really need to take it easy.

    I gave up wearing socks - they are overrated!! Sleeping thru the night is so much more important!!

    Keep up the good attitude and keep us posted.

    L4/L5 laminectomy, L4/L5 360 fusion with instrumentation, L1 to L5 fusion, L5/S1 fusion w/ disc replacement, left and right SI joints fused.
  • armelindarmelind South TexasPosts: 131
    Wow... you wanna know something? That pain from what I thought was the battery pack feeling like an IPad in my back, it is still there. It feels like I have a rigid flat square thing at the base of my back and pelvis. Pain meds controlled it well at first then it got worse. Then they took out my hardware 19 mos later. He said my bone had re-grown and healed well. But still the pain never really went away. So I am guessing I had the epidural fibrosis since the first surgery. The 2nd surgery was easy. I was almost back to normal after a week.

    After my first surgery, I returned to work in just over 2 weeks. I worked 4 or 5 hrs the first few days and a whole day after that.

    Since I play music, I played a 7 hr show (with many breaks) about 2 months after my surgery in a city about 2 hrs away. So I was much better at that time.

    Oh well with my new meds, I am hoping to feel better soon.
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  • armelindarmelind South TexasPosts: 131
    This last year has been my worst. I am in more pain and my endurance is faltering. My teeth are rotting out of my head. My marriage is in trouble. My love life is ruined.

    With low impact chores, I get about 20 minutes of good work in (for some things, even less) and then the more time that goes by, the pain gets incrementally worse. For example, yesterday, I mowed the front yard. It took about 30 minutes. I felt great (subjectively) when I started. By the time I was finishing, I felt out of breath, I was dizzy, nauseous and very weak. Last year at this time, I was able to do the whole front and backyard in 100degree heat with some discomfort. This is common for anything I do. Laundry, dishes, vehicle maintenance, I am definitely losing the battle. My pain from before my surgery never left. My injury was treated and my bones have healed but as my nerves became more inflamed, I have suffered so much more.

    I am still on methadone 10mg 2x a day but it never has allowed me to actually live comfortably. I am not in a good place and I hate the life I have to live. Nothing helps. I cannot relax, I cannot get any relief. Luckily the only thing I seem to have is sleep. However it is a razors edge. I am always tired, but if I sleep too long, I will be in great agony from not getting up and moving around. But if I dont sleep enough, I will doze off at work or while I am driving.

    The epidural fibrosis is a curse. MRI's show that it is there, doctors know of its existence, but there is nothing that can be done about it. I cringe at the thought of how bad I feel now and what it may become in a year or 5 or 10. I am barely keeping my mind straight. I have little happiness to distract me. My pain meds are failing. I am alone in my home but I can not escape my prison of pain. I am trapped in a broken, overweight, stiffening body.

    I have tried exercise, I have tried increasing my physical activity. The result of that is longer recovery time until the pain goes back to the regular throbbing wall of misery. I was losing weight for a while, but it has come back because there is always a reward of intense pain for my activities. I know what muscle pain is, I know strain from working out after being sedentary. This pain is not that. This pain is the aching, throbbing breath stealing, sweaty weight of a garbage truck parked on my pelvis; trying to deform it from the weight of it all. Standing, lying down, walking, sitting is no relief for it. No matter what I do or where I go, my pain is like a living being inside me, feeding on my will to live. It is all consuming and wants me to suffer in a way that I have never suffered before. My pain is retaliating against me for trying to remove it. My pain is digging in to my soul, causing it to whither and putrefy and rot.

    I am the shell of the person I used to be. My wife did not marry this man that she lives with. I am not the person that married her. I live in my own part of the house alone because I cannot let her watch me struggle and writhe in pain from my physical and mental afflictions. I was a happy man. I am no longer that man. it takes every ounce of my energy to participate in life and go to work and do my job, and help my wife around the house. I wear a mask that is blank. I show no feeling or pain. I cannot cry out, I just do what I have to and pray that it wont get worse. It always does.

    I get surges of pain and after a few days, I realize that new pain is here to stay and that is my new pain threshold. I promised myself that if it got worse, I would take care of it in my own way but I cant do that. I have people that rely on me. Even though I am in my own hell, I cannot give up.

    I have a Dr appointment with my pain specialist on May 6. I will let him know that I am at the level where I am going to give in. I hope there is some new news. I have no reason to think this appointment will be any different than the last 2 or 3. He tells me that he is sorry and that there is nothing he can do for me. I know of one other Dr that is 1 hr from me and the rest are about 1.5 hours from me and they wont do any better. I have been looking on line for what could be done about my condition, epidural fibrosis, and from all of my research, the most information I got was from this website. I have said it before... my Dr and all the articles I have read say that I should feel lucky. They say that many with this same issue are either bed ridden or wheelchair bound from the pain. For me, I believe the pain is the only reason I am not bed ridden or in a wheelchair. My pain wont allow me to be in those positions. I have to walk. I have to get up. If I were to not get up, this pain would kill me for sure.

    I wish there was some way I could humanely put my wife and Dr in this pain for 1 week. I have thought of giving it to them for 1 day but anyone can deal for a day then easily relegate it to something less. But if they felt it for a week, I am sure it will leave a lasting impression on them and possibly realize how empty my existence feels. Maybe then, they can work to make me better. I have tried all I know and each answer hurt me more. I am alone in my head with my monster. He grows stronger while I get weaker. I dont know how much longer I can take this. I am losing my battle.
  • armelindarmelind South TexasPosts: 131
    After seeing my Pain Specialist Doctor, He told me I have one last option....Spinal cord stimulator. I am not sure what to think since it is another surgery and a possibility for more scarring. I am still looking up info. I am 50/50 about it... not sure what to think yet. The promotional video seems like it is the perfect choice but so was the surgery and the 5 other procedures I had. I am not sure. Pain has gotten worse since last post so... no changes there. Time for a long excruciating day. Bye for now.
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