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At wits end ....

nurselynnaiennurselynnaie Posts: 167
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:55 AM in Chronic Pain
All day I sit and look at my house and my kids, boyfriend and grandkids wander around. Finally at 7 I get sick of it and start the dishes vaccum and wipe stuff down pick up toys... all of a sudden everyone is looking at me saying what are you doing you know you shouldn't do that lol... if I don't obviously it won't get done. Now after a hour I am shot can't do anything ... can't sit long can';t stand long god forbid if I should lay down my leg will start burning unbearably. Anyone have any ideas how to deal with the pain Deal with the inability to do pretty much anything. I take Ibuprofen 800 Loratab 1-2 every 4 hours. Nothing works


  • Wow! Bless your heart! First I would talk to your family about helping you around the house. My daughter is 13 and I sat down and talked with her about my medical issues and gave her specific stuff to do to help me out. My son is 12 and he vacuums everyday for me, takes out trash and keeps his room clean. My husband does the yard work and helps with laundry. My family tries to help most of the time. There are days when they half butt the stuff but I have learned to let it go. I try to stress to them that I am still working all day on my feet even though my doctor recommended I cut my time to half days. That I am doing the best I can to work to provide for our family and that my husband can't do it all and after that speech it seemed to really open their eyes to my daily pain and how we should pull together to take care of our home. As far as your pain situation I would definitely speak with your doctor to see what may be changed to help you. I hope things get better and wish you well.
  • Thanks Laney,
    I know you are right. I have a issue with independence and always doing everything on my own just because it is easier ... and I need to learn to let things go sometimes. I am going to take your advice and have a talk with my family tomorrow and have them all pitch in ... it may not get done as I would do it with my OCD behavior lol ... but I am going to try to except what I can't change at least just yet. I am def talking to the doctor that I see on the 12th of Sept he is the pain management specialist.. so I am keeping my fingers crossed that he can control the pain better then the neurologist has been able to. Hope everything is well with you and the pain you have is bearable.
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  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 13,423
    It would be very helpful if you can provide us with more information about yourself and your condition.

    - Diagnostic tests - Their results
    - Doctors seen and their suggestions
    - Treatments

    The more we know about an individual;l, the easier it is to respond and provide suggestions. Just remember, no one on the forum side is a medical professional, so any input is based on personal experiences.
    Ron DiLauro Veritas-Health Forums Manager
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences 
  • Hi there,

    I like you used to think that I COULD DO IT ALL. I still do at times. If you continue to do all what you do, people unfortunately will let you as they think you can. No one truly feels anothers pain unless they have BEEN THERE themselves.

    I agree that you need to talk to your family and try to let the little things go by the wayside. It is not that easy I know, but I am getting better at doing just that.

    On a good day I think I can do something and a short while later my body screeches to a halt. Do you have a diagnosis? What has your doctor told you as far as work goes?

    Best Regards,
  • Sorry guys .. sometimes in my mind that has been going a mile a minute lately I forget I probably should tell you my story.
    IN 2006 I worked a night shift and went home, it was the weekend so I decided to stay up. I was cleaning doing laundry when I went to get the laundry out of the washer a pair of jeans were kind of tangled so I tugged on them and I heard a POP was bent over the washer and could not move. This lasted about 15 min. From Oct 2006 to Dec 2007I did pt, injections, pain management, I had so many MRI's Ct's that my underneath of my bed is filled with them. They found a ruptured herniated discs at l3 l4. They sent me to Dr Ferraro a neurosurgeon in Pittsburgh PA .. he was sure that a fusion of l3 l4 l5 would work. So I had that done 1/7/08 38 years old. Was a horrible experience I lost alot of blood .. my BP was unattainable for firt couple days without a doppler and my pain was WAY WORSE down my right side...( during all of this my left side never hurt was alwasy my right). Anyway doctors say give it time lol .... send me home my 17 year old son at the time was helping me in and out of the shower helping me pull up my pants, his girlfriend would come and help when she could and my two youngest sat on my bed and stared at me scared to death. Multiple complaints to the doc over and over it stil hurts it is way worse .. finally they let me come into get mt staples out and say well Sheryl everything went fine but we will send you for extension/ flexion x rays to check .. I went right away they called the next day said they look fine .. I said plz there is something wrong so two weeks later I went back they finally sent me for a CT and low and behold the L3 screw had broke through and was laying in my spinal canal needless to say the Darvocet were quickly replaced w oxycontin and surgery for screw removal was set up for the following Monday. They did that on a same day surgery thing went in in the morning and he took the screw out after I was out of recovery I went home. I wore the back brace the bone growth stimulator I did pT ... I followed up with this doctor until May of 09... multiple ct scans myleograms everything. It all looked good I did still have some pain numbness and tingling on my right side butt down to mid thigh which he contributed to the screw that he had to remove he said it caused some nerve damage cuz it was in there for almost two months. Anyway it was pain that I could take Ibuprofen for and they started me on Cymbalta which helped alot w the pain. I am a LPN single mother so when I was allowed I went back to my normal life (three months after 2nd surgery) I work 50 plus hours a week and then ran the kids everywhere they needed to go wrestlig soccer lol .. did that for three years until May 2011 I was a Nurse Manager and was walking down my hall at work and a larger lady was slipping out of bed so myself another nurse and three aids attempted to pull her back up so she didnt hit the floor then I got this SHARP STABBING double over yelling out pain in my left buttock and shot all the way down to my calf.. Of course I did a incident report and then was taken out of work. I have seen the comp doc who lol knew nothing, then he sent me to a neurologist who ordered a myleogram w contrast and a ct . I went back to see him last thursday thinking ok injections get rid of this pinched nerve (thats what he told me the first time I saw him In June) He comes in sits down and says " I honestly thought you were going to be simple.. You are no where near simple I need to send you to someone else" I said what are you talking about and he said well I would rather you see a specialist wo is a affiliate of mine .. So then I got angery maybe scared and I said WTH did you see. He says " Well I see that your screws are moving they are wobbling around in there everytime you move. I also was unable to see any bone growth around the cages where the discs were removed. This is what is causing the ncrease pain on the left side due to the screws moving and pinching nerves as well as the cages bumping the spinal canal" I just loooked at him honestly I am thre years post op... and he is telling me this now. I said well my pain is on my Left side I have never had that before. Needless to say the man really didnt know what to say to me. He did promise that he would get me a appointment with a doc who had exp with this type of thing. I called the next day to get the appointment because now my restrictions have gone to no lifting or over doing it to dont move your spine is unstable lol.. This is what they told me well Dr so and so doesnt want to see you he wants you to go to pain management your case is complex and they have been going over it tryingto determine if something else other then completely redoing the fusion is possible. I said pain management I dont want the pain managed I want the pain and my back fixed .. I am at my wits end lol ... sorry it was so long
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  • I can so understand that ... After about a hour I am laying in a chair yelling at the kids for not doing it and making me have to ... lol I feel bad for them they get the blunt of the pain. They understand I think. You are very right they try not to get in the way when I start doing something even if I am not suppose to because they know me.. my oldest always says you think you can do it go do it mom I am not fighting with you over the garbage, I am very inpatient when I say the garbage needs to go out it needs t go out right now... lol I need to adjust my thinking and let them take over they are old enough 12;14;21 You are right!!:) I am over reacting most of the time.
  • Hi Nurselynnaie,

    I am still pre-surgery on my spine but have had all the conservative and alternative treatments except some heavy duty meds, and this began in 1985 after I broke my tailbone and have had numerous problems since. Most recently, I am having problems with radiculopathy right arm and am looking at an ACDF 2 level.

    I do believe that you need to research all of your options right now. I can imagine the pain you are feeling. Hopefully you'll find good answers soon.

    There are others that may be able to help you more but know that I am hoping you find some better answers soon.

    Broke my tailbone in 1985. Dealing with ruptured discs in my back and cervical area, arthritis,osteoporosis degenerative discs, CTD, Fibro and PKR and other things.

  • Hi Nurselynnaie,
    Sounds like you are feeling better emotionally with things today! I am glad! I can totally relate. I depend on my 13 year old daughter to do so much. She does great most of the time, but she is still a kid! Sometimes she gets tired of doing extra stuff around the house and I understand. I feel the same way you do at times. Like the kids, the family take the brunt of our pain. I feel like at work I have to put on my actors cap and then by the time I get home I am ready to scream just out of frustration of having to smile and pretend I feel great. It really can get old. What really makes it suck is now my doctor has recommended and actually written me a note for work to cut my days in half and we cannot afford it. I have two children of my own plus two step kids and it's not easy when 3 out of 4 are teenagers and one of those driving.

    I hope that your family can understand where you are coming from and that their "cleaning" (lol) is atleast close to being comfortable for you. It is so hard when we are sitting there in pain looking around at STUFF that we so want to clean up but we can't! I am right there with ya on that!

    I wish you well and hope that you get some much deserved rest and relaxation! Have a great week!

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