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Frustrated & just need to vent. My apologies
I was compelled to medically retire from law enforcement this year after loosing all strength in my right leg; and being unable to walk the rest of the day while at work without the aide of a cane. I was told it was for safety reasons, which I fully understand.
Now to get medical retirement, I need to provide ALL medical records to the board from two years prior to my initial injury in 2001, until I am (hopefully) approved for medical retirement. Which could take a year or more. Add to that dealing with social security disability and financial concerns.
Now my pain management doc has me on percoset, which I absolutely hate. Sure it minimizes the pain, but the side effects I could do without. He also wants to place a spinal cord stimulator in my back which would hopefully get me off the pain meds, which I would be thankful for.
My surgeon however is against the stimulator as he can "fix" the retrolithesis when the time comes. Problem is, no one knows when that will be. I am already at 4mm at L5-S1, with my L4-L5 beginning to ooze out more of its innards. And with the facets deteriorating (according to my latest MRI) it might be sooner than later.
Add to that not working or being able to do anything close to what I used to do, such as mountain climbing, hiking, mountain biking, canoeing and other outdoor activities. It gets rather frustrating to say the least.
I guess the most difficult part is, getting motivated to do much of anything. Even the things I am still able to do, like amateur radio.
Sorry for the rant and thanks for reading, but frustration has set in and my lovely bride of 22 years deserves a break. I know I will pick myself up and move on because that is what I do.
View my history for all the gory details.