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advocate for chronic pain

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13

Comments

  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 13,298
    edited 05/21/2013 - 1:57 AM
    Respectively, and I mean that in a total professional manner, Anelsen and I have battled back and forth regarding the issue :
    Does, or Can Chronic Pain cause Death?

    By itself in black and white terms, I still hold that no one is going to die from a spinal problem.

    But there is so much that goes around that. I had a good friend on this site, he was very valuable and helping members whenever he could. The chronic pain, suffering every day finally caught up to him and he took his own life. Its not my religious beliefs, but I just do not believe in someone taking their own life.

    Can I understand that they can? YES, Will I ever believe it is ok? NO

    Everyone has a choice, that many times is what separates us from animals. What we do with those choices, is where we can draw the lines.

    Right or Wrong? I am a believer in that Life is the most important thing we have. We might struggle through it, it may create enormous hardships, but the strong always find the way beat those dark dark thoughts and figure other ways to move ahead.

    I was so very close , closer than most of you can imagine, that I was in a situation where someone asked me to end their life. I refused. They cried and begged me, still I refused. Weeks later they did die, but it was natural .

    So does chronic pain kill, I still say without a doubt NO
    Ron DiLauro Veritas-Health Forums Manager
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences 
  • dilauro said:
    Respectively, and I mean that in a total professional manner, Anelsen and I have battled back and forth regarding the issue :
    Does, or Can Chronic Pain cause Death?

    By itself in black and white terms, I still hold that no one is going to die from a spinal problem.

    But there is so much that goes around that. I had a good friend on this site, he was very valuable and helping members whenever he could. The chronic pain, suffering every day finally caught up to him and he took his own life. Its not my religious beliefs, but I just do not believe in someone taking their own life.

    Can I understand that they can? YES, Will I ever believe it is ok? NO

    Everyone has a choice, that many times is what separates us from animals. What we do with those choices, is where we can draw the lines.

    Right or Wrong? I am a believer in that Life is the most important thing we have. We might struggle through it, it may create enormous hardships, but the strong always find the way beat those dark dark thoughts and figure other ways to move ahead.

    I was so very close , closer than most of you can imagine, that I was in a situation where someone asked me to end their life. I refused. They cried and begged me, still I refused. Weeks later they did die, but it was natural .

    So does chronic pain kill, I still say without a doubt NO
    XXOO
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  • Shoot!!! I tried the quote thing and that's not at all what I wanted! Sorry Ron...
    XXOO
  • this goes back to risking jobs friends etc.
    i as a teacher have a morals clause that can cause me to get fired if i go against it. being on narcotic meds can be a problem if not taken carefully. my belief was to be as honest and upfront as possible with my school district. i would not lie or keep things secret. that is my own personal belief and i can see where jenelle is coming from and respect her decision.. even being open and hones i have received harassment from teachers administrators, HR and the union. i had doctors write a list of accommodations and gave them to my district, hr and admin. when being evaluated, a admin stated that all i did was sit down. i told her to read my accommodations but she said that wasn't in the list when in fact it was. the district had to buy an expensive chair which ticked them off and the last straw a couple of teachers i work with logged a complaint about my lollipops even though i did not use them around the kids. i never use my meds around kids. well HR told me i had to get a note from my dr and he wrote one saying my meds did not affect my job and be also said to tell them to f..k off. his exact words. so i do have issues about meds but i am willing to go public, more so than i have. i still respect jenelle and those who don't want to. i would not want to risk my position either if i were a ceo. but i will do this if others do and not treat this like a pipe dream where all we do is talk. we need action not talk
    jon
    I have 4 fusions from L5-3, the latest last May '12 where they fixed my disc that broke.They went through my side this time. I take 40 mg of oxycontin 4x a day and 4 fenatyl lollipops 300 micro gms 4x a day.
  • Kiki48KKiki48 Posts: 196
    edited 05/18/2013 - 5:53 PM
    Dilauro, I thought that was a great way to present your views. My intention is to share my views in the same respect.

    Because I obviously don't understand the quote thing right now I am doing it this way.

    Dilauro said
    "By itself in black and white terms, I still hold that no one is going to die from a spinal problem"

    Will you pls elaborate on what you mean by that. Mainly because I know because of your knowledge with the spine it's pretty much black and white that people do die from a broken atlas or axis or both. Not always but it does happen. Mabe too with the other cervical spine fractures. I have not done that research on the other C's as of yet.

    Chronic pain and suicide...I agree everyone has a choice. I don't believe one is better than the other. I believe that it takes alot of strength to commit suicide from chronic pain. I also believe it takes alot of strength to live on with chronic pain. It's an incredibly hard decision to end your life from chronic pain. And it takes strength to make that decision either way you make it. It takes strength from those you love to be selfless if that's what you decide to be okay with that. It says much about them if you can tell them/prepare them this might happen and them to wish you peace because it's your choice and they understand if you weren't so miserably in pain, death would be the last thing on your mind. But they don't want you to live in the pain if you yourself can't take it. I'm aware that many people who have loved ones who have comitted suicide blame that they are the victims and left to live there lives without them. And how self centered it was that they checked out no matter how much pain they are/were in. Too me that's completely self centered. Mabe with some chronic pain suicides, they do take there life for self-centered reasons. I believe many of them have nothing to do with self centeredness. There is a difference between selfishness and self centeredness.

    Does Chronic Pain kill? Mabe not. Does it lead to suicides? Absolutely. Is it okay? Who can really make that call but the individual themselves?

    Kiki
    XXOO
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  • Kiki48KKiki48 Posts: 196
    edited 05/18/2013 - 5:59 PM
    Dilauro, I forgot I wanted to express.... I can't imagine having someone ask me to end their life. I would refuse as well. It would be so very hard to do seeing them in that much pain but I would like to think I would have done the samething you may have done. I could not ask someone to do that for me. I can't even think how difficult that must have been for you.

    Kiki
    XXOO
  • I think we loose so much through pain - our old lives and some of our friends. Guess we have all thought of suicide at times but just being able to comunicate with people who are in the same boat is so great. It makes me feel like I'm not alone and I think a part of suicide is the feeling of being alone. Blogging on this site had been so good for me, doctors should recommend it as part of therapy because this site is the best therapy I have had for years.

    Kiki I agree if your life looks like it's never going to be any better, what's the point of being alive But it does hurt everyone around you. There is a great site called living works. I did a course through this for work as I dealt with a lot of injured veterans and I had a suicide call every couple of weeks from someone who was ready to end it all, had their plan in place and called me just before they were about to carry it out. I just made them wait until I could get some help to them and didn't lose one of them.

    I carry the suicide intervention model round in my wallet at all times and have had to use it a few times out of work as well.

    I'll give you some of the stuff on it. You aren't supposed to use it unless you've done a course but you need to ask the person if they are thinking of suicide which is the hardest thing. They will tell you if you ask.

    Here is a summary:

    Questions

    Are you having thoughts of suicide? YES SUICIDE Keep them safe, give them safety contacts i.e friends who they can call or services, make them promise you they won't use alcohol or drugs (except their medication), link them to resources

    Do you have a current suicide plan , how, how prepared, how soon? YES PREPARED Disable the suicide plan

    Do you have pain that at some time feels unbearable? YES DESPERATE Ease the pain

    Resources Do you have few, if any, resources? YES ALONE link to resources

    Background factors

    Prior suicidal behaviour
    Have you ever attempted suicide? YES FAMILIAR Protect against the danger/support past survival skills

    Mental Health
    Are you receiving or have you received mental health care? YES VULNERABLE Link to health worker.

    The most amazing thing is that if you ask people they will tell you.

    I believe chronic pain is a silent killer. Ron I am sorry you lost a good friend.

    That's what's great about this site. Suddenly there are people who are going through the same thing and it really eases the pain and loneliness we all feel sometimes.

    Don't be afraid to ask if people are thinking of suicide. They will tell you and I've spent hours sometimes days sitting with people to make them feel safe.

    I've looked up people in Aus who are famous but the information is hard to find.

    I do believe pain is a silent killer and this is a great idea. It does need to be brought out in to the open.
  • by the way, on espn they had a show on magic johnson coming out with aids. there were all of these platitudes and famous people accepting him and going on tv and setting up a foundation etc etc. why not for chronic pain you say? one thing it is not a deadly disease like cancer or aids where you die directly from pain. there are people who die indirectly from pain but i don't think a direct corrolation between chronic pain and dying has been proven but does that not mean we have issues either. we do because chronic pain for the most part affects the rest of our lives. so this is one roadblock we have to overcome if we want an advocate, to show people that even if we don't die, it makes our lives a horrible way to live
    jon
    I have 4 fusions from L5-3, the latest last May '12 where they fixed my disc that broke.They went through my side this time. I take 40 mg of oxycontin 4x a day and 4 fenatyl lollipops 300 micro gms 4x a day.
  • sandisandi Posts: 6,269
    edited 05/19/2013 - 5:54 AM
    I have written to both newspapers, and my legislators about living with chronic pain, and the changes to the laws, the restrictions and the financial burden placed on patients to comply with the ever increasing compliance mandates and restrictions.
    I have an outline of sorts, depending on the reason that I am writing, that I have used, but like to add my own story to give it a bit more impact. I used the government links available on google and other browsers to get the contact information-email addresses for senators, legislators, etc.......
    I think that our best hope for change is to keep contacting our government officials, repeatedly, each time a new proposal is made for more change or restriction. Or we need to band together to get rid of those who refuse to listen to their constituency.
    Sandi
    http://www.statelocalgov.net/50states-legislature.cfm
    http://www.senate.gov/general/contact_information/senators_cfm.cfm
    http://www.house.gov/representatives/find
  • I just wrote my state senate, california. i will let you know if there is any feedback
    jon
    I have 4 fusions from L5-3, the latest last May '12 where they fixed my disc that broke.They went through my side this time. I take 40 mg of oxycontin 4x a day and 4 fenatyl lollipops 300 micro gms 4x a day.
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