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Sometimes you just need to tell the universe that "IT HURTS"!

CherylCCCherylC Posts: 199
edited 09/07/2015 - 11:44 AM in Chronic Pain
Sometimes you just want to put it out there. You're not looking for sympathy and you know that there are no easy answers - you just have to endure it until you get through it.

I've tried telling my nearest and dearest but that doesn't help - it just makes him worry more and he gets frustrated because he can't take the pain away. I don't want to burden family and friends, they will all stop for a moment and offer sympathy and advice ... have you tried this or that, or, if you follow the advice in this or that book you will never be in pain again and then they will move on - they have their own trials to deal with. I even tried just "putting it out there" once via my private account on Facebook - I got comments such as "What is it now?" - so all that did was make me feel like a winger ...

So ... what is it now?

Nothing really - I'm just a little frustrated and definitely over it!

Why? Because I have been stuck in a breakthrough for two days and I just can't get on top of it. At the limit on breakthrough meds. Even the slightest twisting movement is causing me to cry out. Major difficulty with walking, sitting or laying down so lots of alternative pain free things do do - NOT:(. Haven't been this bad since the early days of recovery after surgery and last surgery was in 2013!

Have spent the night trying to figure out how to turn over without crying out - not much success. Now I am focussing my effort on figuring out how to get out of bed. Do I need an ambulance? Maybe ... Am I going to call for one? Probably not ...

When will it end? What do I do? How do I make it stop? All good questions but none of them need to be answered. It will end when it ends.

Thank you Universe for letting me just "put it out there".

I just need to scream at the universe for a moment or two
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13

Comments

  • I probably do this more then I think. My family is immune to my sounds since seems like it's become a part of me. Now I'm having extreme leg pain. Like Charlie horse but front and back of leg and foot is involved. Have no clue what this is just trying to get comfortable and can't stretching, walking, resting. Feels like my legs have been run over by a truck. I don't think anyone of us would mind you screaming, I'm sure most of us have been there.
    Vicki
  • 2dgs4cmpany22dgs4cmpany Posts: 200
    edited 09/07/2015 - 11:55 AM
    We are here.

    of course I have to suggest - any worse - go to hospital. If it is any worse. If you absolutely can't make it until you call you doctor tomorrow (which I highly recommend). Off my pillar of advice now.

    Scream it out, in writing. We are here.
    Happy
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  • Sheri76Sheri76 Michigan Posts: 572
    I live in an apartment, and often wonder what my neighbors think I'm up to....granted I wouldn't scream unless I had to, and I sure hope somebody would care enough to check on me, or call for help. So, sometimes I cry as quietly as I can.
  • PlumbTuckeredOutPlumbTuckeredOut Philadelphia, PAPosts: 325
    and I thought about my different ways of tolerating the pain. Tonight though I'd like to scream too!

    I also live in a small apartment- a tiny one in the middle of Philadelphia. I can hear the voices from outside but they cannot hear the voices inside. But I'd hate to alarm anyone who did hear a scream! Years ago now I lived in the deep woods and even then I wanted to see how loud I could scream and I never have. I'm too inhibited to make a scene.

    So I'm screaming here instead even though typing hurts now. Sitting upright hurts. Moving my arms, moving my head! What craziness! Our own bodies fail to allow us to convey what we feel we need to do!

    I need to go into the kitchen, a few feet away, turn off the lights, and return to bed- behind me. Extremely small apartment! I don't know what I'd do if I were faced with stairs or long hallways.
    So I'll do my silent scream (think Edvard Munch!) and go to bed.

    Thanks
    Sheila

    Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by...... (Robert Frost)
    I still don't know if I should have taken the one that said, "Caution! Dead End" (Me)
  • Thanks for the words of encouragement. I went to my physiotherapist the morning after I posted this. It appears that I have some serious levels of inflammation around L4/5 and also have a 'protective' muscle spasm that is causing seriously nasty acute pain every time there is any form of twisting. Probably my own fault. I was having such a good day that I tried to act like a normal person and did things like make the bed etc. Must remember not to get so enthusiastic about housework in future!

    Isn't the body amazing - looks like it's trying to protect itself from further injury by inflicting an acute pain attack at level 12 out of 10! (trust me - not exaggerating. It's been so intense that I have come close to passing out a few times)

    Anyway - Diazepam and heat packs to try and ease the protective spasm and high levels of agony for the next week or two until the inflammation goes down. No wonder I want to scream!

    Grammaof9 (Viki) Sheri76 and PlumbTuckeredOut - feel free to scream at the universe! I found it helpful just to put it out there about how much it hurt without having to worry about what reaction it would cause. I hope that it has helped you two. I also hope your pain levels get back under control.

    I hope this thread serves as a place for others to just scream out. It has helped me - maybe it can help you too!
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  • SadAthleteSadAthlete Toronto Ontario Posts: 39
    It took me six months to convince my friends that my back was in bits and the neuro pain was so horrible that trying to run was actually impossible unless I wanted to get hobbling on one leg for the rest of the week and totally pissed off at anything that breathed.
    Continue to suffer from alignment issue and myofasical pain in rib cage and pelvic area.
    Nerve pain and back pain are more stable these days but still get flare ups.
  • Sheri76Sheri76 Michigan Posts: 572
    I hear you SadAthlete....these past years I've often wished someone would invent a pain simulation machine,... where the person in pain could be hooked up, and another person (like the Dr) hooked up to the other. Whenever the person in pain moved, the other would feel it all, just as you are feeling it. What a great diagnostic tool that would be. You could take your unbelievingly friends to your next Dr appointment.
  • SadAthleteSadAthlete Toronto Ontario Posts: 39
    Thats a great idea, like I said luckily my friends understand now that what I have gone through and continue to struggle with is not your typical muscle sprain. My Mom has been the best through all of this, she could almost see the pain signals firing through my body when I was at my worst, god bless her.. Seriously...
    Continue to suffer from alignment issue and myofasical pain in rib cage and pelvic area.
    Nerve pain and back pain are more stable these days but still get flare ups.
  • PlumbTuckeredOutPlumbTuckeredOut Philadelphia, PAPosts: 325
    edited 09/16/2015 - 3:10 PM
    I came looking for this thread! I'm so busy with life issues and needing to scream "IT HURTS" , even if it's only typed, helps!

    Thanks
    Sheila

    Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by...... (Robert Frost)
    I still don't know if I should have taken the one that said, "Caution! Dead End" (Me)
  • MeydeyMeydey Posts: 591
    edited 09/18/2015 - 9:56 AM
    I totally get it. It's hard to make others understand who haven't gone through what we have. It's very difficult. I hate sounding like a broken record all the time..my back, my back, my back...Sometimes I want a little sympathy, other times I feel ashamed and try to hide the pain.
    Ol' Spiney..Micro-D L4-L5, TLIF L4-S1 -post op central HNP L4-S1,stenosis, retrolisthesis, EF, facet arthropathy, lumbar& cervical DDD. FBSS- Medtronic pain pump & SCS
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