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how to move on after scoliosis? (mentally)

I can't stop thinking about my scoliosis, whenever i feel happy i remember that i have scoliosis and the mood goes down.
Only because this stupid school never cared about our physical and mental health.

Like serioisly i have mild ocd but high anxiety and after the worst period of my life i get told now that i have scoliosis and that its "partly" my fault.
Couldnt they make more tests in school I mean its not like 2% of the whole world have scoliosis and its not like we have 2 hours of sports each week.. what for anyways..?

So now that i have this stupid illness i dont feel like working out anymore. I was doing good for 1 month but since i know i have it, i feel it's useless.
Have you ever seen a muscular guy with scoliosis?
Me neither..

I just wanted a healthy body to start training..
But it doesnt matter anymore right...
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Comments

  • It would be fine if I was old but im young.
  • memerainboltmemerainbolt IndianaPosts: 6,058
    Why would it be "fine" to have it when you're old verses having it when you're young?
    There are people younger and older than you that have it.
    Are you currently seeing a specialist? Have you worked with him on options or how to manage it? Have you talked to him regarding exercises that you should or should not be doing?
    You're giving up way too early in the game. And why is this your fault?
    Sorry, I just have a lot of questions but that's what we do here. We learn about each other so we can learn from each other. I might have missed where you've already posted all this I'm asking, sorry. But would really like to know a little more about you and what's going on.
    Don't let the anger take over. If you need someone to talk to, we're here.
    Sandra
    Spine-Health Moderator
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    Please read my  Medical History
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  • WLLadyWLLady Ontario CanadaPosts: 1,435
    Hi vergil900
    i am very sorry you are having difficulties....i did read and respond to your other post....no sitting like that will not cause scoiliosis! Otherwise most people will have it! 
    I do not know how to help but to tell you a bit about my story-not just with scoliosis but with life. 

    I do not consider myself old. But my change happened when i was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 42.  Then my husband was diagnosed 1 year later-at the age of 40.  What do you do? Roll over and let it take you?  No way. Somehow you dig deep and you learn who you are. You make the decision to own it. Yes that was cancer and not scoliosis-but either way it is a life altering diagnosis.  I am not scoliosis. Scoliosis does not define me. I do not allow it. 

    You need to find a physician to help you treat it and help you attain your goals. 
    If you want to be a muscular body builder-do it. Just know that you may need to alter the exercises so you dont end up with painful irritation because of the curves. But what is to stop you from trying? 
    And yes-i do know muscular people with scoliosis.  I also know a person with bad scoliosis facing a wheelchair if they do not do surgery (and maybe even if she does) who had just about every dream ripped out from under her in the last 2 years....just got horses to be told if she rides she will likely sever her cauda equina or permanently damage it because of a 70+ degree curve at L2-after getting her first 2 horses she dreamed of having horses from the time she was 10 years old. She was training to run her second 10km road race....and had to stop because her left leg kept giving out. She built a barn after saving up every cent she had for 10 years to realize her dream of being a farmer and living off the land to discover now she cannot lift a bucket of water to water the chickens and horses with because arthritis ate her back and gave her degenerative and rotatory scoliosis . She took up a shooting sport that she loves to be unable 5 years later to fire a gun because of the pain.
    Yeah...if you havent guessed yet..that is my experience. My point is life is what you make it. Do you let scoliosis define you? Or do you change and figure out how to do what YOU want to do and not let it beat you?

    I honestly do not know how to dig inside and figure out how to make that decision to not let it define you.  I do not know how i did it or where it comes from. Maybe its because i have had to fight for everything i have had my entire life that taught me that i can be and do anything-even if i am not perfect....even if arthritis is eating my body and making me different from normal....but i cannot let it define me-i have too many things to do in life to roll over and admit defeat. 
    So i wont ride again. That doesnt mean that i love them any less than i do! The same with other things i love...okay i never loved running-but you know what? I can swim. So i do. Will i ever run again? I dont know...but honestly do i need to run to be a whole person? Does it make me any less of a person if i cant? I dont think so....
    Will i be in a wheelchair after surgery? Maybe. Maybe not. If i dont do surgery i WILL be....do i accept that? NO. But if it happens i will deal with it. Because scoliosis does not define me. I dont let it. 

    I wish i could tell you how to feel differently, how to find the motivation from within-but i dont know where it comes from. Maybe its from not wanting to be told what i cant do.  I dont even know what i can help with, but i hope that you dont give in to the feelings of uselessness and despair about not even bothering....

    I hope that you can find a physician that will help you learn what you can do and how to do what you think you cant do...and someone that will help you treat and manage your scoliosis so that YOU control it and do not let it define you. You did not cause your scoliosis to be there-but you can manage it to the best of your abilities....


     

    Kathy
    Spine-Health Moderator
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    Dec '16 T10-S2 fusion with pelvic fixation. Laminectomies L2, L3, L4, L5, facet removal, cages L4-5, L5-S1, severe scoliosis, arthritis and stenosis repair. 

  • You make me motivated WLLady.
    So I'm up to believe that it's totally not my fault that I have scoliosis and that it might be genetics..?
    That would be a great thing to be sure of.
    Anyways I will tell how my scoliosis progressed if I ever make another x-ray thingy..
    But still weird that scientists don't know what causes it. It's such a visible illness at high degrees.

    There must be an obvious cause to it. I thought the cause was too much sitting in school on old chairs and not enough sports but if you say that can't be it... well...

    I will take a break now from this forum.
  • WLLadyWLLady Ontario CanadaPosts: 1,435
    a ton of what i am reading is saying that there is a very strong genetic component. there are also other factors that seem to be involved-in my case arthritis caused my facet joints to erode to the point where they no longer hold my spine straight and everything is falling over. i went from no scoliosis to 70 degrees in less than 2 years! and it's still going.....
    please, get another xray-talk to your doctor-find out exactly how fast it is progressing, IF it is progressing, which way does it curve? Where is it? is it thoracic, lumbar, cervical? 2 of the 3? or all 3? What can be done now to slow it down, or stop it from getting worse? what muscles should you stretch and what muscles should you strengthen to try and slow it down, and prevent the onset of bad bad pain and instability? is bracing an option? is there an underlying condition like uneven disc erosions? or facet arthritis? or vertebral wedging (where the bones grew on an angle when you were growing? How old are you? Where are you? can you find a spinal clinic near you to get in to see a spinal orthopedic surgeon or a neurosurgeon-or both? Please keep in touch, let us know how you are doing.
    Kathy
    Spine-Health Moderator
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    Dec '16 T10-S2 fusion with pelvic fixation. Laminectomies L2, L3, L4, L5, facet removal, cages L4-5, L5-S1, severe scoliosis, arthritis and stenosis repair. 

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