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March 3rd I went into the hospital because i had a new onset right foot drop and couldn't move my leg without assist. I have had 3 L5-S1 right sided hemilamis. So my surgeon and I decided on a PLIF at that level. My surgery was the 9th because he had office Monday and Tuesday and was booked Wednesday. Immediate postop was horrible. My pain was not managed at all for 3 hours. They put me on a morphine PCA. I told them I did not want morphine because it does nothing for me. They finally got pain management involved and I was good to go after three hours of crying and agony. Mind you i also had a dural tear so I was laying flat for 24 hours. He was unable to put a drain in due to this. Things progressed and I was able to move my right leg and I was walking. Then on post op 3 I had no sensation to urinate. No feeling in "that area." I'm a neurosurgical nurse myself so i knew it wasn't good. They put a catheter in and 1250cc of urine came out. THAT'S A LOT. I had no sensation of the urine in my bladder. They did and MRI the following day (they wanted it done that day but didn't order it stat). The PA came in with that look on her face. The MRI showed a massive hematoma pressing on the cauda equina. So I had cauda equina syndrome. Yay. They did surgery again the next day to drain it and put in a drain. Holy cow. Being opened twice in the same spot in matter of days was painful. I'm at home now after a 12 day stay in the hospital. I felt pretty good the first two weeks but now it's bad. I was on dilaudid but that wasn't working well. The Half-Life is quite short. Then Percocet, and now fentanyl 12mcg patches to help. That i just started yesterday. So we will see. I don't know if maybe I'm doing too much or what. I'm 30 years old. I have a 3 year old. And a 6 year old who is on a dance comp team so mon, wed, fri and Saturday she has class for hours. I have help from my husband who is also a nurse but he is working overtime to supplement my not working. I am getting disability but it's only 60%. I just needed to let this out in a forum where people can relate. Every time I feel a little burn down my leg i get worried or that numbness in my foot. It's on both sides now which I know is a possibility afterwards as like I said before I am a neurosurgical nurse of 8 years. Any tips from people in similar situations as me?