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Trying to rest but can't due to depression and my life

Cindyx3CCindyx3 Posts: 144
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:33 AM in Depression and Coping
I had acdf June 30th came home the next day and my neighbor from hell was ripping up a wall that he put on my property. I hate him and I don't hate anyone, but I hate this guy. He's a slime. Today he was ripping up the sidewalk, unreal to me!!!!! It's been a nightmare all because he wanted to put in a driveway. My husband yells at me because this guy is not following the city rules. I have to cope with pain and now try to recover and also deal with my EDITED life.

I'm not doing to well and maybe it's due to not smoking. I guess it helped me cope with my EDITED life. I'm a teacher and can't get a decent job and I'm sick of people thinking it's OK to EDITED on me, including my husband. He is upset because he has to help more, I want to get better and just run away.

Sorry, very sad and in a lot of pain today.:(

Inappropriate language edited by moderator Paulgla on 7/9/09



  • i'm pete and i'm also in pain. my wife is a retired teacher and my daughter is a biology teacher...youve been through he$$ and you certainly have reason to be down in the dumps and depressed. i have seen days in my life when depression hit and it was terrible. i've told people i'd rather be in pain than depressed.
    but how to climb out of that deep hole? just posting here is a first step.
    sometimes pain killers and other meds can bring on depression...what drugs have the drs given you?
    is there something you can do to relax. call a friend?
    relax at the beach. peace and quiet. you need to treat yourself well. be good to yourself and ask for help.
    i'm sure other folks here will want to help you as we have all stood in your shoes.
    oh one more thought...anger causes depression. You got hit...you must be angry. does it make sense to talk with psychologist to try to ease some of your anger...or get it out of your system?
  • Doc has me on prcocet since operation. It takes the edge off the pain but I walk around like a crazy person. Could it be the medication or all the insanity in my life??? I'll try to just take tylenol and see how it goes. Man this hardware hurts! I have anxiety about going back to work in September and if I'll be able to and bills that are piling up! OVERWHELMED and idiots distracting me from what I need to do. If I could punch my neighbor I would!!! If I told you all what this man put my family through over a friggin driveway you wouldn't believe it! The jerk did get what was coming to him. He was worried about one inch and it turned out he was on my property and lost 5 inches. If he shut his mouth he would have still had extra inches but he lost it and was upset that I wouldn't let him put his wall on my property! What a jerk, a wall that had been there for over 60 years he removes for one extra inch that turned out to be mine and I wasn't filing for a permit for him to put a wall on my property. I wall was in the middle of both properties for over 60 years and now he has to choke on less room. Not my fault yet he has the nerve to be rude to me. Then he's sorry one day and doing mean things the next. I told him, I hope you never have your neck ripped opened and metal put in your spine and come home to this aggrevation, but then again what goes around comes around and he's getting his because he can hardly fit his cars in his driveway due to being a sneaky liar! Sorry just really annoyed and sick of people trying to take advantage of me.
  • The percocet along with the stress is taking its toll on you. But if you are hurting, tylenol might not be enough and maybe you should talk to your Dr about another form of pain meds. Also, maybe something to help you with all the stress you are currently going through. We all have had times in our life when things get too much.

    I had been hurting for 2 1/2 years before they found what was wrong. And now am going through reocvery from a PLIF. It was 7 months ago and I still have dailey pain. Had pnuemonia for 2 months and recently found out I have a tumor in bone in my head. Have to have 2 knee scopes done. It can all get overwhelming, and I had to go on antidepressants. Best thing I ever did, 2 years ago. I dont think I would be here if I hadnt. Think about it. You need to feel better, in some way. If not medication, maybe a visit to a friend or relative out and away from the neighbor for a few days would help. I hope this makes sense. I hate to think of the stress you are feeling. Heres a warm and gentle hug. >:D< Hope it helps. I'm here for you if you need me...
  • Hi Cindy,

    My name is Maryanne. You have just been through a major surgery less than 3 weeks ago. Give yourself a break! Not only has your body suffered the assault of surgery, you are also dealing with the effects of the pain meds. I can tell you my experience with Percocet is that it made me CRY LIKE a BABY, for no particular reason, at something as silly as sad commercial on TV!

    The neighbor thing, well, you can't control someone else. There will always be difficult people. However, if your neighbor wants to spend his time fretting over a driveway, so be it - you've got more important things to do, like care for yourself and get better. Think of your neighbor as some insignificant little gnat who is of no more importance to you than a minor annoyance. Screw 'em! You owe it to yourself to not let this get under your skin right now.

    There will be plenty of time to deal with this LATER and at your convenience, as well as all your other concerns. Nothing is going to come crashing down TODAY.

    Take it one day at a time, one hour at time if you have too. You will get through this!

    Take care,

  • You have a lot on your plate. It's often easier to get angry at the outside sources than deal with the real source of your anger, and just having had surgery doesn't help one bit. My husband often got angry with me after surgery and it's only been the last few months that he's come to the realization of what he was doing to me. We have to realize that our situation adds stress to their lives as well- not that it makes it okay for them to act like fools but it makes it easier to understand that they get hurt by this too.

    I've been in therapy for a long time to deal with my anger of being hit and injured. It was something I just couldn't do alone and it was taking over my life. Someone posted a joke on here which turned out to be the thing that opened my eyes to my behavior and feelings. It was a quote from Larry the Cable Guy and said "Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm". It made so much sense to me- I was enthusiastically depressed!

    Since I've been in therapy and on anti-depressants I've been able to cope with my anger better. It's not gone, not by far and never will be, but it's not all consuming like it once was.

    You know I'm here for you and you can PM me anytime if you want to talk about it. I understand and will do what I can to help you along.

  • I agree with the others. You are to close to the surgery to handle all this well, so try to let the driveway thing go and stop talking to the neighbor. gotta love people like that...

    Percocet, It can drive some people right up the wall and I do not like it... I find I do better on either Hydrocodone/Vicodin/Norco or Ultram/ultracet/etc, There are other options.
    If you're ready straight Tylenol may be the best move.

    Please talk to your doctor about your current feelings about all this. Don't be afraid to ask for a little emotional support if needed, been there done that, bought the T-shirt, lost it and can't find it...

    Hope you feel better soon, don't forget to allow yourself time to heal!
  • I'm doing better and I'm still on pain meds. My neighbor apologized to my husband and I refuse to look at him. He knew I had surgery and couldn't care less the pain and upset he caused my family. I am a firm believer in what goes around comes around. Just a jerk! I could care less about him. I do still get upset but not as much. I do need therapy because I've been through a lot. We all have on here. You're all wonderful people and thanks for your replies. Sorry you had to edit me, just was having a really bad day.

  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,846
    So many of us have them. But we always have to remember to keep within ourselves during those times.
    If not, there are many things we can do or say that will might regret later on.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
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