Welcome, Friend!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Veritas-Health LLC has recently released patient forums to our Arthritis-Health web site.

Please visit http://www.arthritis-health.com/forum

There are several patient story videos on Spine-Health that talk about Arthritis. Search on Patient stories
Protect anonymity
We strongly suggest that members do not include their email addresses. Once that is published , your email address is available to anyone on the internet , including hackers.

All discussions and comments that contain an external URL will be automatically moved to the spam queue. No external URL pointing to a medical web site is permitted. Forum rules also indicate that you need prior moderator approval. If you are going to post an external URL, contact one of the moderators to get their approval.
Attention New Members
Your initial discussion or comment automatically is sent to a moderator's approval queue before it can be published.
There are no medical professionals on this forum side of the site. Therefore, no one is capable or permitted to provide any type of medical advice.
This includes any analysis, interpretation, or advice based on any diagnostic test

When does it become enough?

dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,868
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:55 AM in Depression and Coping
Yesterday, I received news from onw of my best friends letting me know that his brother shot and killed himself in the parking lot where he worked.

This was very hard news to take, not only for the person, but for how hard it will be for his wife he left two teenage daughters he left behind.

What does bring a person to a point where they feel that the only solution is taking their lives?

Depression is an very ugly disease. I will call it a disease, because it can cause so much pain. And that so may people have it, live it and do not get any treatments.

What situations and circumstances bring a person to this edge?

So many of us are dealing with painful medical conditions that have placed a huge amount of strain not only on ourselves, but for our loved ones. At times it seems we have no way out and that this life of pain is what we have to deal with forever.

Forget about my personal religious beliefs, I can and never will see or understand one taking their own life.

To me that seems like the easy way out, knowing that the ones you left behind have to deal with that situation and move on.

I guess and this is only a guess, is that so many of us have an avenue to release our problems. We have a community that understands each other, so nothing seems that strange. But how many people have that same outlet?

I tend to believe not many That is just one of the reasons the site owners, my team and so many other members always try to promote the positive side .

Is your glass half full or half empty?

I only hope that through the efforts of my team, the owners of this site and so many members that we see that glass as being half full and that more will come to fill it up.
Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com


  • Ron,

    Since I posted on this on another thread a year or so ago, I can maybe give some input as one who came >this< close to ending it in my past.

    In my case it was due to sexual abuse by a step father that the 'ex' mother ignored and too blamed me for...hence the 'ex'.

    I was 13, and my game plan was to walk home from school (4 miles), and when on the last portion of my walk (a semi highway), my plan was to wait for a truck, and jump in front of it. Luckily for me, a fellow classmate knew something was wrong, and wouldn't let me walk home alone. After a lot of tears, talking and screaming at times, she said this to me (and I use it as my mantra to this day)... "There is nothing anyone can do to you to cause you to give you the death penalty!"

    Pain for many of us is the "anyone" (in my mind anyways). When one gets to where "that's it, I'm done" you are in a tunnel that is very dark. That tunnel is your pathway to ending the misery...be it pain, abuse, life sucks etc. When you get to the point that there is no "light at the end of the tunnel" and you feel lowest of low, worthless, those thoughts come in. The door opens to the easy out.

    What I learned additionally that day is who would I hurt due to my selfish "temporary" actions? Who wins? I of course wouldn't have.

    In my career as a pilot and most especially in law enforcement, I've had far too many friends "end a temporary problem by a permanent end"...and to this day I have yet to forgive even one. Another tool that I have in my "won't go there again" toolbox.

    But Ron, there is a lot of thought believe it or not that one goes through before that faithful day happens. You don't wake up and say "gee, I think I will end it today"...it isn't like that. It is a build up, and a lot of internal thinking, many times on the negative side that brings one to take the ultimate and final step.... Posted via personal "almost did it" experience...:(

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • i just wanted to say even though i did not know this person he must have reached a massive low in his life to resort to suicide .and to that i have some knowledge as my father in law hung himself 10 years ago just gone .and the hurt from that still lingers on ..my thoughts are with you {as i know you} and his family .very sad news Ron
    1997 laminectomy
    2007 repeat laminectomy and discectomy L4/L5
    2011 ALIF {L4/L5/S1}
    2012 ? bowel problems .still under investigation
    2014 bladder operation may 19th 2014
  • Ron,

    I am sorry to hear about the loss of your family friend. Please know that you and the family is in my thoughts and prayers. I also know quite a few people that have attempted suicide, and one person who was successful.

    I don't know what causes people to get there. Sometimes I think it is an untreated mental condition, or even physical pain leading to a mental condition.

    Although I knew suicide was never an option I knew what it was like to be in so much pain that I felt my life was over. The sadness and depression that comes with it is so overwhelming. If someone feels that way for long enough, and especially if they feel they are a burden on others, it can come down to suicide.

    Through my experience of neck pain, I have finally made a decision about what I would like to do for the rest of my life. I would like to be a counselor/therapist, so that I can help people in pain (mental or physical) and possibly turn some lives around. I am currently looking into graduate programs.

    This site and all the supportive members has made this "spiney" journey just a little bit easier. I truly appreciate the support network that we have going on here. Thank you Ron- and all the other administrators, for keeping it going.


    ACDF C4-5 June 23rd, 2011

    Another surgery in the near future. I am 26 years old.

    Current Meds- Norco 7.5/325, Cymbalta 60mg, Gabapentin, Adderall 20mg
  • Ron,
    So sorry to hear of the suicide... I have had 3 friends who committed suicide, and all were seeing the glass empty, never mind half empty or half full...
    It was very sad, especially for those they left behind.. I will keep his family in my thoughts and prayers.
  • One moment in time and making a bad decision like your friend's brother did doesn't realize the pain he would cause his family and future pain. My own cousin also took her life and ODed and left her 22 yr old son and 8 year old daughter then my cousin's daughter's Father died and she's an orphan at only 12. She's 13 now and has to go to Psychotherapy to go on. there's a lot of anger now and it's not easy as she was like the sister I never had and we were only a month apart in age.

    I encourage anyone who feels like they can't make it to check yourself in the hospital and surround yourself with positive encouraging people and you will get through it. There's always hope for tomorrow no matter how bad it may seem today.

    Depression is an illness just like any disease and there's help available. Call a distress line or get to a hospital where they have a Dr. on call and medications available. Isolation and loneliness can bring anyone to imagine unreal thoughts. Reaching out doesn't make you weak and you're not a rock or an island on your own. I believe there's a reason for everyone here on earth and you have a right to be here. reach out and you're not alone as someone will understand and help you. I like Deserata a poem of inspiration that I look at from time to time and one can see others and what they're going through and life is a gift and you have something to offer someone no matter what you're going through you will get through this. I take each day at a time and if it's not a good day I know tomorrow can bring change.

    We can't do what we could before but we can find something that brings us pleasure and hope for the future.

    Condolences for your friend and his family what they're going through. My best. Charry

    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • Ron, I`m so very sorry for the loss of your family friend. I also, like Brenda, have known people who have attempted suicide and unfortunately succeeded. I also have experianced the feeling of abuse. Thinking at 15 years, please God take me, please, I can`t stand living any longer! I was beat by my father, sexually abused by a family member,and a mother who chose a bottle to help her get through life. We lived in a small town. We were masters of looking like the perfect American family. That being said, at 15,I chose the selfish, and fast end to my life. A bottle of aspirin(60). I planned it, I thought at 15 my plan would work!!! Nope, got my stomach pumped out(I`ll never forget that), NOT, part of the plan! That was in the 60`s, so my family, Doctor,and hospital covered it up. No mental counseling. Life went on... I discovered, if I couldn`t control anything in life,I could control my body. In the 60`s eating disorders, were not known! I`m a master, at anorexia! There are so many ways of killing yourself. With no mental help, I continued living my life. God blessed me with a husband, who has always loved me and made me feel adored,(most of the time,sometimes I forget how much). Bless his heart,he didn`t know all my secrets. God also gave me 3 amazing children. Which leads me to a train wreak!!! I raised my children(always knowing,don`t raise them how you were raised)never beating,never hurting them in anyway. Life goes on, 1 daughter raised & married, son graduating college, and our beloved baby daughter off to college. Life was so great! Then the day, no parent should experiance, the call. The day she was coming home for Christmas, The Dean from the University of Arkansas,Dec.16,1998, told me she was dead. Gone at 19. The most amazing daughter. She never gave us 1 worry!!! GONE,WHY,HOW? We will never know. I just know,if there is a death at a college and the school is in charge of the investigation,forget finding the truth!!! One of the hardest questions, God, why her? Why not me? Why do good, loving parents have to experiance that pain?... I now know, whatever life gaves you, and how you deal with all lifes up`s,down`s and pain, we own them. I wish I had known and done abetter job, at taking care of the body God gave me. I believe my problems with my spine are hereditary,my own responsibility for my body and mental health. Sometimes, it is so hard to see the glass half full,or turning lemon`s into lemonaid. If I had been successful at 15, I would have done the most selfish, unforgivable thing .At 15,I thought I just couldn`t handle it. Like the beautiful song,"The Dance", I would have missed all life`s pain! But, I would have never gotten to see & experince all the wonderful things God has gaven me. I`m very thankful and very blessed. I hope as long as I live, I can gave back and stay positive. If ever I can help another,it is a good day... Brenda
  • Like Meucci said, "someone" has to clean up the mess. Over the years, and more so after having friends 'eat their gun', another mess was realized. Had I jumped in front of that truck that day, what hell would that driver had gone through? He/she would have done nothing wrong, yet here is this stupid kid he hit!

    One of my co-workers did the 'contrary' actions before he ate his gun. Most suicide folks cancel activities, appointments, plans...basically isolate in the last days of their plan. My co-worker didn't do that. No note, nothing, even planned on going fishing with some of the guys - he canceled though that day "something came up" was what they were told. On that faithful day, he awoke, had coffee with his wife, and then told her to take a long walk. She later told me she "sort of" knew what he was going to do, but knew she couldn't stop it.

    When she came home, she discovered he had shot himself in the head, in their bed! I'm sorry, but to this day I have not forgiven him. Not so much for the suicide, as I know what drove him to it, but the location!! To kill yourself in your marital bed....shaking head....I've never gotten past that. That ranks right up with if I did jump in front of that truck. That driver would have been scared for life.

    Crime scenes with messy bodies are bad enough, but those that were murder suicide, or just suicide, most are messy and leave a mark. Sadly when one gets to where they are "done", logic is out the window, and the tunnel is there for you to go down and do it. Some (like my friend who talked me out of it that day) can be pulled out of that tunnel, and see the sunshine once again!

    I also remember as a 'tween' my sister OD'd twice. She never talks about it, but part of me isn't sure if they were indeed 'accidents'...sigh, maybe they were...shrug.

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    ....I am so sorry for your loss.
    And for the others who have responded and experienced loss..my deepest sympathy.

    My heart has felt the deapth of despair, also. I felt I was a burden and everyone would be better off without me.
    Some of that has proven true. My friends are few, my family have chosen to not have contact with me. So in a way...I have relieved them of the burden that is me..and they have no communication with me.

    But I still see the sunshine some days and enjoy a thing or two along the way. I take care of myself as noone else could do as good a job.
    And keep hope for a day of reconciliation... to see my grandchildren.

    I also decided noone...and no pain... is going to have power over my destiny..and my life here on earth cut short to effect my eternity (religious belief).

    My depression is a reality and a struggle. But with my doctors and therapists... and thankfully, this site... I have support. I mean you help me stand tall and maintain that hope for a better tomarrow.

    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,868
    Your post is very thoughtful, personal and has a message that every member on this site should get and understand.

    Thank you for your post
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • Sorry to hear about the loss even if its just a friend of a friend or who ever it may be its always a sad thing. I dont know what leaving a mess behind has anything to do with suicide when its way deeper then that. Leaving a mess behind is just materialistic if you ask me and has nothing to do with the depression that causes these people sometimes to kill themself.

    If the only reason someone dont comit suicide is because they dont want to make a mess sounds a litle crazy to me. But of course whatever works i guess to keep those thoughts away if it works. If thats the only reasoning a person finds then i would thing yes should be seeking treatment.

    I dont believe there is 1 person that has not thought about it at 1 point or another suffering in chronic pain. As i said before in a previous post . Before my scs trial having to see a shrink i told him . Anyone in this kind of pain that never thought about it is either crazy or they just wont admit it. Or they are not in as much pain as they posibly claim in my opinion.

    But of course that dont mean i would do it of course for i have plenty to live for. Many are depressed because family and friends left them behind. That includes me. But as the bible says. Forgive those fools who dont understand and dont know any beter. We are no less of a person just because we are injured.

    We have to keep our self worth and respect ourself enough to know we are strong and we can fight and nobody will bring us down just because of there ignorance to our situation. And besides. Pay back is a bitch. Not sure if thats in the bible. But i know it should be.

    Maybe we can re write the bible?
    Flexicore ADR 2004 resulting nerve damage l4l5 Fusion 2006 same level, 2009 hardware removal with lami !
    2012 scs implant ,
  • Hi Ron, sorry to hear of your family friend's decision. I feel bad for his family.
  • Ron, sorry about your friend. As Alex said, it doesn't matter how close you were, it still hits hard.

    However Alex, the "mess" isn't necessarily the visible mess, it's the emotional mess that the families and friends, and anyone else who's lives were touched by the person have to suffer after. The unanswered questions, the loss, the anger... It's all just as messy.

    I love what Savage wrote:
    I also decided noone...and no pain... is going to have power over my destiny.
    What an awesome thought!

    I've known more than my share of people, friends and aquaintances, who have committed suicide (more than a couple of dozen). And with the Afghanistan mission, there's more all the time. It never gets easier. I'll never understand it, because as bad as I've been with the PTSD, as well as the pain, I could never. Life can sure suck some days, but it will never be that bad for me. One thing I've learned though, is that you can put 10 people in the same situation, and all 10 are going to come out of it differently. Things affect each and every one of us in a different way, be it the mental and emotional demons from our past and present or the beast, physical pain.

    A little plug for some psych therapies here. I was just at my Operational Stress Injury (OSI, which includes all psych diagnoses like PTSD, depression, anxiety disorders, in our cases due to operational deployments) support group tonight that I volunteer with. A lot of the guys do something called neuro-feedback. I've never tried it myself, if you want to know more about it, I suggest googling it, but most of them really like it. There have been some who didn't, but that goes with not everyone is the same. We have one guy who also was just deemed cancer free earlier this year, after a 2 year battle with it. He just started coming to the group last month, and started neuro-feedback around the same time. The difference in him is so obvious. He told us tonight that the psychologist asked him this week when the last time he thought about suicide was, and he said he surprised himself, because it's been a couple of weeks, where it was basically 24/7 before. He was singing the praises of neuro-feedback tonight, that this has basically saved his life.

    Another newer therapy is called Emotional Freedom Therapy. There is a group of mental health professionals that are working with vets, and have put out a video about it, if you google it, you will find it. It involves "tapping" the pressure points that are used with acupuncture, working with your body's natural energy. My psychologist is big into using this technique (again, I haven't tried it yet) but a friend of mine who also sees him did start doing it a couple of months ago, and loves it. He said that within 3 sessions, he was finally able to talk about the incidents that haunt him without breaking down and into a cold sweat and causing wicked anxiety attacks. Now, just because I mentioned vets, it's not exclusive to just us, it can be for everyone who suffers from depression, anxiety, anger issues, etc. The site also shows how it's done, and there are videos that talk you through the exercises, so you can do it at home by yourself. I haven't done it myself, as I am at a point that I don't really need it anymore, but after watching the videos (includes the actual sessions with people) and seeing the change in them, had I known about it even a year ago, I would have been all over it. The change in my buddy is amazing, too, he's come so far since he started it. He, along with a couple of the other guys, was at a funeral yesterday for a guy from our regiment who was killed last week. Buddy said he was seconds from getting up and leaving, because he was going to lose it, but decided to stay and work on one of the pressure points in his hand (he didn't tap, but pressed on the spot so he wasn't obvious about it). He said that within a couple of minutes, the anxiety attack completely subsided, and he was able to sit through the rest of the service. If I ever get back to that point, it will be one of the first things I try.

    Anyways, just thought I'd throw those two things out there, as it might help someone.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • Oh that mess. I been reading with 1 eye and this is the 2nd post i missread then. Ok i got it. The family mess i can understand. I was thinking the other mess brenda mentioned which is small popatoes compaired to the emotional suffering person must of been going through finding no other way out. I guess i just feel more for the person that had no other way to resolve there suffering because i can put myself in his place and i know his family will suffer and not understand but we all have lost a loved one but our life always goes on and find a way to get through it.

    But once a person is dead. There is no more. And especialy if there was no chronic pain condition involved and the depression could of been treated makes it that much worse in some cases. Thats what i was refering to i guess.
    Flexicore ADR 2004 resulting nerve damage l4l5 Fusion 2006 same level, 2009 hardware removal with lami !
    2012 scs implant ,
  • Part of the 'mess' I was referring to is like my friend made. His wife (also a friend) was mentally destroyed for years over that sight, so NO it is not small potatoes as you put it. Yeah the person is dead, and no more pain that caused him to do it, but her pain can become just as severe, and it includes the final visual.

    So I will stand by the ways some end it, DO affect the living, some of which end up going out the same way. It's a bad deal all around. To one small potatoes, to others not.

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    Thank you for the reminder of the "tapping" type therapies.
    I did go through that with a therapist when I was in despair about my divorce...about 15 years ago.

    Sometimes I notice the tapping I will be doing to.. well my forehead mostly..and I think it's so cool that my body..or something in me..remembered and was trying to take care of me! :)

    Now I feel motivated to look into it again as it did help me with my anger and depression at that time.
    Results were noticed very quickly in my case...so yay..another tool to keep on keeping on!
    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • Savage, I'm so glad that you saw the post then! Everything happens for a reason, I went to the meeting, my buddy talked about tapping, I wrote about it here, and it reminded you of how it helped you before. Weird how things happen like that. Good luck, and I hope you have success with it again!
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
  • I already said i agree about the emotional aspect of it having to see it and all that. Its obvious i am talking about the mess itself if a person ate there gun as you put it. Unless he used a shot gun or something i guess would be a mess and not a prety sight. And the visual would of had a much worse affect if he did it in front of her.

    So i am sure in his mind he was avoiding that making sure she is not there. Either way these are of course sad situations and i am not underminding her reaction and emotions about the mater. I was just simply refering to the mess that has to be cleaned up after something like that which i would hope she would of called in some outside people for such thing. So that my reasoning for calling the mess small potatoes for its after the fact of a suicide and its a clean up as it would be with any crime scene.

    Its not that i am trying to be cold hearted by any means for i feel the emotional hurt of course is a very serious one so dont missunderstand. I just cant blame him for making a mess for i am sure was the last thing on his mind being in that state of mind.

    If it was me that did it. I am sure Sandra would probably be bitching oh great! Not bad enough i have to pick up his socks and underwear every day. Even when he leaves earth i still have to clean up after him that bumm!
    Flexicore ADR 2004 resulting nerve damage l4l5 Fusion 2006 same level, 2009 hardware removal with lami !
    2012 scs implant ,
  • Yeah, she of course didn't do the clean up. I may have just not expressed myself correctly in so far as the mess's impact on the living.

    I too was meaning the emotional mess aspect of those that leave us by their actions. I guess to for me, having come this >< close to doing it myself as a teen, I gave a lot of thought as to what the messy mental effects would have been.

    That poor truck driver that I involved by jumping under his truck. The friends that did care for me, and too family etc. Aside from my very observant friend who wouldn't let me walk home alone, "thinking" after what affects I would have induced helped keep me turned around.

    What you said about your wife, hehehe,... the same could have been said by me if my hubby did that! (G)

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • The constant pain, sleep deprivation, not eating and constant trips to the doc and being told there is nothing we can do for months puts you into that long dark tunnel and the light just went out. An admittance to the hospital and a few days of hydromorphone turned the light back on. I now know there is a light and there is a treatment "when" the pain gets out of control again. A previous post was right it is a long process and many like myself look for anything to prevent it, it's when you don't find it that it becomes a possibilty.

    My condolenses for your loss.

    The above is my opion only nothing more nothing less
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    ...writing. Your words really touched me. And I am very sorry about the your father.

    Thank you for sharing your experience. Again, your words are very moving.
    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • I also am sorry for your lose.I myself am struggling with whether to end it all. I know it is a selfish act and something I don't want to do. I never thought I would even consider it because I don't believe in it but when does the suffering become so unbearable you can't deal with it anymore. My husband is a retired police detective and when he was considering retiring, we had to think of a way to make a living afterwards and we started a crime scene cleaning business. We did that for 13 years, until this past January. I have read a lot of suicide notes and seen the pain left for those loved ones left behind, it is a tradgic situation. I never thought I would be one to consider it myself! I don't want to put my family through that pain but how much pain am I suppose to live with. I am putting them through so much apin as it is because they don't know what to do to help me and I am not living much of a life anyway. I have just had my 2nd surgery and it really hasn't helped and created some new problems. I have been dealing with this for 12 years. My family doctor says I had surgery I should be fine and quit treating my pain, cold turkey. The surgeon allows me 4 hydrocodones 4 times a day but it is not giving me enough relief and I still hurt alot and cry alot. I haven given up everything I love and I don't do anything at all except go to grocery once a week. I use to spend my life volunteering and helping people. I have no friends anymore because people don't like to be around people in pain. My husband is depressed because he doesn't know how to help me. I found a pain clinic that will help me but not until a doctor agrees to sign a pain contract to take over care in 6 months. I told my doctor about this and he said good and I told him he has to sign the contract and he said no way. So I have no doctor. I have called about 40 doctors and I can't even get my foot in the door because now adays they ask up front what you are taking and when you get to pain medicine they ssay we can't help you. If you do find a doctor that will see you, you have to wait at least a month to get in and lets face it, on your first visit they don't know you and are reluctant to deal with pain issues or they want to start at the beggining and try all the things you have already been doing for the last 12 years. I don't have much pain medicine left, no doctor, and I don't know what todo. All I know is I can't take that much pain. I am not crazy, I enjoy life and I do want to live, but I can't take that much pain. No one wants to get involved in pain issues and it doesn't seem like the medical community cares whether you live or die. If you take pain medicine for an extended period of time you are made to feel like you have a problem. I feel like because I have back issues and pain problems, I am clumped in with the addicts, or like what works on average should work for all. I know there is help out there but I can'y seem to find it in this area and time is running out. It is unfair to want to live
    and enjoy life but you can't find the help. Just because you need pain medicine doesn't mean you can't live a useful, productive and happy life.
    Suicide might be said to be the easy way out but it is a painful decision and something I don't want to do, but I know I can't take that much pain, so where do I turn to for help?
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    ..unbeleivable that doctors are behaving that way.
    Refusing to sign the form..etc.. So sorry for you.

    I have experienced the doubt from docs, but I now have meds to keep the edge off and to keep me out of the ER. Before that, I was in the ER regularly.

    The emergency room may be an option to get the care you need until you are recommended to a pain management doctor.

    Unbearable pain without treatment is unbelievable in this day and age.

    I would hope you would go to the ER for pain relief, each and every time. Eventually, one of the docs should come across your case and get a doc to take care of you.

    But taking care of yourself is not easy. I say this to myself as I say to you. Going to the ER is not a weak move..it's taking care of yourself because, sadly, noone else understands. For like example, if it was your sister or child, you would be relentless in finding help.

    Suffering, being weak and exhausted...it's not easy.. but try to be relentless in pleading your case as you would for someone you love.

    Be relentless in with your tears, exclamations of agnony and no relief..no relief..no relief. If you need to imagine yourself as the child you were, so be it. Do not stop caring for this person in horrific pain and who is begging for relief.

    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    ...be in my thoughts and prayers. And your family, also.
    I do know the aloneness and thoughts.
    Please stay connected. You're not alone and we're here for you!
    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

Sign In or Register to comment.